Viewpoint Do you ever play the opposite gender? Do you prefer it?

[Flowiest D]

I usually rp as male characters as I feel me role playing a female would be off. I don’t know how a woman would feel in most situations etc etc.
Yet a male character has (at the bare minimum) my reactions and thoughts, as a male I know how I (or would like to assume) I would react.
I don’t mind playing female NPC’s or relevant characters but I don’t particularly do romance or any huge things with female characters as I think I wouldn’t do it justice.

 

[rae2nerdy]

But what if you AREN'T a gender? Does this question still apply?

//jkjk

I've never actually put any thought into which "gender" character I've ever played, because it's never been important to me as an agender person. Gender to me is literally just a word, and it holds no significance.

That said, when I do roleplay, I typically like to grab stereotypes for whatever they may be and throw it out the window. Because screw stereotypes. I love my crybaby males who have no qualms expressing their emotions, I love my strong, powerful women whom people don't view as a b---- because she's not afraid to speak her voice, and I love my characters who just want to express who they are no matter what it may be.

I do mostly play male characters, but these days I'm just getting more and more agender folk because I can and there are still very few of them out there in the roleplaying world. Genderfluid, too. They just don't seem to be character aspects that lots of people feel comfortable (for some reason) roleplaying. I've never agreed with how some people say "never write about anything you don't personally know about" because then that'd just make everyone a boring writer LOL

So, I play every type of character because their gender has nothing to do with their personality or character, unless it's a story about them discovering their identity or something. Which most of the time it's not.
As an artist, it's really just aesthetic, their gender. Nothing more, nothing less.

I think for gender issues specifically it’s more the same reason people don’t play as a controversial ethnicity or a specific mental disorder.

Especially with mental disorders this site is FILLED with folks who will go up in arms if you play a mental disorder you do not personally have or have not done extensive research on.

Unfortunately it’s not as easy to research “gender” , “race” , etc as it is a mental disorder.

So those same people who are too intimidated to play a mental disorder for fear of offending someone don’t play non binary genders or other races as they’re afraid of getting something wrong and having half the site after their blood.

Also speaking for the older demographic it’s just harder to write no gender. It takes a lot more effort to figure out the write pronoun and working it into a flow for the character.

It’s actually as difficult as writing romance explicitly for me. It takes me out of the experience as I’m focusing specifically on an aspect that I know I’m not comfortable with and I don’t honestly understand.

So it comes across frustratingly stilted and I’m never happy with the end result.

So yes in theory people should be the same no matter what but the thing about writing what you know isn’t you write literal your self insert into all stories it’s about writing experiences that you can empathize with and understand to the extend you can portray them naturally.

Someone writing a mental disorder based on research or stereotypes is not going to be as comfortable with it ( as a general rule ) than someone who actually experiences it.

Same with gender. If you understand gender to be binary and your only creating an agender character from stereotypes ( most likely ) or research ( sadly less common ) than your not going to be as comfortable with it as someone who has experienced being agender ( either personally or in their immediate social group )

People forget it’s a changing time and not everyone grew up with the idea of things like
agender, transgender, homosexuality , racial diversity, etc.

They might seem easy to substitute in or portray well but it’s a big shift especially for an older demographic.

 

[Alyxsandre]

I think for gender issues specifically it’s more the same reason people don’t play as a controversial ethnicity or a specific mental disorder.

Especially with mental disorders this site is FILLED with folks who will go up in arms if you play a mental disorder you do not personally have or have not done extensive research on.

Unfortunately it’s not as easy to research “gender” , “race” , etc as it is a mental disorder.

So those same people who are too intimidated to play a mental disorder for fear of offending someone don’t play non binary genders or other races as they’re afraid of getting something wrong and having half the site after their blood.

Also speaking for the older demographic it’s just harder to write no gender. It takes a lot more effort to figure out the write pronoun and working it into a flow for the character.

It’s actually as difficult as writing romance explicitly for me. It takes me out of the experience as I’m focusing specifically on an aspect that I know I’m not comfortable with and I don’t honestly understand.

So it comes across frustratingly stilted and I’m never happy with the end result.

So yes in theory people should be the same no matter what but the thing about writing what you know isn’t you write literal your self insert into all stories it’s about writing experiences that you can empathize with and understand to the extend you can portray them naturally.

Someone writing a mental disorder based on research or stereotypes is not going to be as comfortable with it ( as a general rule ) than someone who actually experiences it.

Same with gender. If you understand gender to be binary and your only creating an agender character from stereotypes ( most likely ) or research ( sadly less common ) than your not going to be as comfortable with it as someone who has experienced being agender ( either personally or in their immediate social group )

People forget it’s a changing time and not everyone grew up with the idea of things like
agender, transgender, homosexuality , racial diversity, etc.

They might seem easy to substitute in or portray well but it’s a big shift especially for an older demographic.

Actually that's where I don't exactly agree.
There's a specific obviousness that some things will never be 1:1 if you haven't experienced it yourself, but take, for example, why can actual psychopaths portray empathy towards things even if they can't (according to various studies and research) feel empathy? It's because psychopaths are very good at mimicking things because they've observed it.

So the same thing applies to writing.

I'm also of the older demographic (as far as I'm aware, RPN's always been very young. I'm 24, turning 25 this year.) I grew up in a time when the word "agender" and "gender-fluid" hadn't even really been something of the mass public, much less known. Heck, the internet didn't even really spur up when I was still a child. I didn't even have a computer until 7th-8th grade! I didn't have a phone until High School, and even then it was just a walkie-talkie phone! And I grew up in a Mexican household, which even down to its language is a very gendered culture, but yet here I am, able to put those conceptions aside and realize that some things are more just words and experiences.

So I think it's less "knowing it personally" and more "being open to hearing and learning about the experiences and facts of X thing." Especially with mental disorders. Culture's the same.

Gender has never been that for me, because in a perfect world (which is usually what fiction is, in its own way), gender never matters. It doesn't change anything about our characters unless, as I said earlier, the story is about those struggles. Mental disorders have a physical and emotional effect on how characters react, so research must be done. Culture affects outward appearance and behavior, so research must be done. But Gender, from years of observing, doesn't (until we get into some social justice issues, but in the day-to-day life, that stuff isn't completely apparent). In most worlds, a person doesn't look at somebody and go "oh that's a girl." right away. Oftentimes it's "oh wow that person has a cool shirt." And then they'll make the connection that maybe they're a girl.

If the focus is about how gender expression affects the day-to-day life, then I agree that there must be proper research done, because they are experiences that the normal person would not personally know. But if it's not, I see no reason, especially as an agender person, to bring attention to a person's gender if it has no affect on the story.

Now, feeling comfortable playing a specific gender is definitely a different thing in and of itself, and unfortunately the fact that some communities have the view of "if you haven't lived it, don't write it" makes it hard for any casual writer to want to explore different aspects that they haven't personally experienced. They scare them away. Just like how people talk bad about up-and-coming writers. We all make mistakes at the beginning and we won't be able to get things perfect right away...

But that's what practice and doing proper research is for. To be able to capture those experiences as properly as possible.

 

[rae2nerdy]

Actually that's where I don't exactly agree.
There's a specific obviousness that some things will never be 1:1 if you haven't experienced it yourself, but take, for example, why can actual psychopaths portray empathy towards things even if they can't (according to various studies and research) feel empathy? It's because psychopaths are very good at mimicking things because they've observed it.

So the same thing applies to writing.

I'm also of the older demographic (as far as I'm aware, RPN's always been very young. I'm 24, turning 25 this year.) I grew up in a time when the word "agender" and "gender-fluid" hadn't even really been something of the mass public, much less known. Heck, the internet didn't even really spur up when I was still a child. I didn't even have a computer until 7th-8th grade! I didn't have a phone until High School, and even then it was just a walkie-talkie phone! And I grew up in a Mexican household, which even down to its language is a very gendered culture, but yet here I am, able to put those conceptions aside and realize that some things are more just words and experiences.

So I think it's less "knowing it personally" and more "being open to hearing and learning about the experiences and facts of X thing." Especially with mental disorders. Culture's the same.

Gender has never been that for me, because in a perfect world (which is usually what fiction is, in its own way), gender never matters. It doesn't change anything about our characters unless, as I said earlier, the story is about those struggles. Mental disorders have a physical and emotional effect on how characters react, so research must be done. Culture affects outward appearance and behavior, so research must be done. But Gender, from years of observing, doesn't (until we get into some social justice issues, but in the day-to-day life, that stuff isn't completely apparent). In most worlds, a person doesn't look at somebody and go "oh that's a girl." right away. Oftentimes it's "oh wow that person has a cool shirt." And then they'll make the connection that maybe they're a girl.

If the focus is about how gender expression affects the day-to-day life, then I agree that there must be proper research done, because they are experiences that the normal person would not personally know. But if it's not, I see no reason, especially as an agender person, to bring attention to a person's gender if it has no affect on the story.

Now, feeling comfortable playing a specific gender is definitely a different thing in and of itself, and unfortunately the fact that some communities have the view of "if you haven't lived it, don't write it" makes it hard for any casual writer to want to explore different aspects that they haven't personally experienced. They scare them away. Just like how people talk bad about up-and-coming writers. We all make mistakes at the beginning and we won't be able to get things perfect right away...

But that's what practice and doing proper research is for. To be able to capture those experiences as properly as possible.

And I think that the most people for better or worse don't do research on their characters. And when you combine lack of research with the prevalence of people on this site specifically who will jump down you're throat if you do something wrong ( not just with gender but with anything really ).

And you got to remember that with those youngsters they're going to be more sensitive to precieved criticism.

Now I'm not saying you can't play outside of your comfort zone I'm just saying that it's a lot more effort AND you have to be comfortable enough as a writer to face pushback by the community.

Which I would say like 99.9% of the folks on this site aren't going to be able to do.

 

[Alyxsandre]

And I think that the most people for better or worse don't do research on their characters. And when you combine lack of research with the prevalence of people on this site specifically who will jump down you're throat if you do something wrong ( not just with gender but with anything really ).

And you got to remember that with those youngsters they're going to be more sensitive to precieved criticism.

Now I'm not saying you can't play outside of your comfort zone I'm just saying that it's a lot more effort AND you have to be comfortable enough as a writer to face pushback by the community.

Which I would say like 99.9% of the folks on this site aren't going to be able to do.

I think that's where we as writers have to have thick skin, though. I mean, I'm a visual artist AND a writer, so I've faced various types of critiques my entire life. If I was scared to do everything, then I'd never grow.

You can't achieve something if you're scared of offending everyone. Unfortunately a lot of people these days are very sensitive to things, but that just means they're closed-minded and aren't open to different interpretations of things. Or that there are even people who experience things differently.

And honestly, it's a bit sad. Nobody should be scared to explore something just because some people are a little over-sensitive. If anything, those people should be disregarded because they're toxic. I've never once hard of toxic people being healthy for the growth of anybody.

 

[hostage]

I love playing all genders, as it feels pretty satisfying.

 

[Octavia; Skairipa]

Sometimes you have to, but, I don't play male well. Other male RPers are always trying to fight me when I play a male character and I don't do aggressive well.

 

[rae2nerdy]

I think that's where we as writers have to have thick skin, though. I mean, I'm a visual artist AND a writer, so I've faced various types of critiques my entire life. If I was scared to do everything, then I'd never grow.

You can't achieve something if you're scared of offending everyone. Unfortunately a lot of people these days are very sensitive to things, but that just means they're closed-minded and aren't open to different interpretations of things. Or that there are even people who experience things differently.

And honestly, it's a bit sad. Nobody should be scared to explore something just because some people are a little over-sensitive. If anything, those people should be disregarded because they're toxic. I've never once hard of toxic people being healthy for the growth of anybody.

And I think that is where both of our ages come into play. As I said I'm on the older end of the demographic which means I've reached a point where I honestly don't care what people think of me, my writing, my characters, etc. As long as we're having fun and being civil that's all I really need.

But I look at where I started and I know I would never have been able to face that push back in the beginning or even for a good portion of my roleplay career. I tend to be on the timid side rather than overly assertive.

Really most of my assertiveness now is more of a factor of - Ain't no one got time for you're B.S. toxicity - than any real growth in assertiveness or the like.

And I do tend to stick to my comfort zone in terms of romance ( namely I'll only do it if you specifically request it and even then I'll struggle ) because frankly romance is difficult for me to write and it tends to on the whole take me out of the story. I do slightly better with estabilished relationships but it's still an iffy practice.

But granted romance doesn't really have anything to with gender and for that I tend to play either some random archetype that I think will fit or whatever my partner requests.

But I do think that there is something to be said for knowing your limits. Some people are just not going to be able to do specific thing and some people are not going to want to try because they don't want to deal with the potential for conflict.

Either is fine. I mean sure it's easy to say - don't let the toxic bullshit get you down - but not everyone has a personality that will allow for that.

I mean I can handle criticism a lot better now as a middle aged adult than I did in my teens or even early twenties. That still doesn't mean that it doesn't upset me when people attack me or attack the way I'm doing things. It just means I've learned ways of coping.

However my mother is nearly twice my age and she's the kind of person who can be driven to tears over a slight ( real or imagined ).

So if she were to roleplay she would likely be exactly the kind of person to stick to her comfort zone because it's just not worth getting physically upset over something that should be a fun hobby. Does that mean she would be a bad roleplayer? No. It just means she would be slightly less adventurous than you or even me.

 

[C.C.]

It can be fun sometimes, but I don't prefer it :3

 

[Alyxsandre]

And I think that is where both of our ages come into play. As I said I'm on the older end of the demographic which means I've reached a point where I honestly don't care what people think of me, my writing, my characters, etc. As long as we're having fun and being civil that's all I really need.

But I look at where I started and I know I would never have been able to face that push back in the beginning or even for a good portion of my roleplay career. I tend to be on the timid side rather than overly assertive.

Really most of my assertiveness now is more of a factor of - Ain't no one got time for you're B.S. toxicity - than any real growth in assertiveness or the like.

And I do tend to stick to my comfort zone in terms of romance ( namely I'll only do it if you specifically request it and even then I'll struggle ) because frankly romance is difficult for me to write and it tends to on the whole take me out of the story. I do slightly better with estabilished relationships but it's still an iffy practice.

But granted romance doesn't really have anything to with gender and for that I tend to play either some random archetype that I think will fit or whatever my partner requests.

But I do think that there is something to be said for knowing your limits. Some people are just not going to be able to do specific thing and some people are not going to want to try because they don't want to deal with the potential for conflict.

Either is fine. I mean sure it's easy to say - don't let the toxic bullshit get you down - but not everyone has a personality that will allow for that.

I mean I can handle criticism a lot better now as a middle aged adult than I did in my teens or even early twenties. That still doesn't mean that it doesn't upset me when people attack me or attack the way I'm doing things. It just means I've learned ways of coping.

However my mother is nearly twice my age and she's the kind of person who can be driven to tears over a slight ( real or imagined ).

So if she were to roleplay she would likely be exactly the kind of person to stick to her comfort zone because it's just not worth getting physically upset over something that should be a fun hobby. Does that mean she would be a bad roleplayer? No. It just means she would be slightly less adventurous than you or even me.

Ability to take constructive criticism and ignore lash-backs most definitely takes a place in this situation. Especially if there's a lot of people around who are saying the same thing. In that case though... I think that this is where those who can stand up for themselves should take a stance and be able to confront these toxic folks. If things really are as bad as you make it out to be... I can't help but to wonder why this site allows that to happen?

In the end, of course comfort zone should never be dismissed, either. Roleplaying, at the end of the day, is something we do for fun, and if we're forcing ourselves to do something, then it most certainly won't be fun. Or healthy.
So if you don't feel comfortable for personal reasons playing a specific gender, then there is no need to force yourself to do it. Again, roleplays are meant to be enjoyed! I feel comfortable roleplaying as any gender or lack thereof, so I'll do it because I enjoy it~
But if one doesn't feel comfortable simply because they're scared of people jumping at them because they got one thing wrong... Then clearly something is wrong and it needs to be fixed. Why this toxicity is allowed to be on the site in the first place is baffling.

 

[rae2nerdy]

Ability to take constructive criticism and ignore lash-backs most definitely takes a place in this situation. Especially if there's a lot of people around who are saying the same thing. In that case though... I think that this is where those who can stand up for themselves should take a stance and be able to confront these toxic folks. If things really are as bad as you make it out to be... I can't help but to wonder why this site allows that to happen?

In the end, of course comfort zone should never be dismissed, either. Roleplaying, at the end of the day, is something we do for fun, and if we're forcing ourselves to do something, then it most certainly won't be fun. Or healthy.
So if you don't feel comfortable for personal reasons playing a specific gender, then there is no need to force yourself to do it. Again, roleplays are meant to be enjoyed! I feel comfortable roleplaying as any gender or lack thereof, so I'll do it because I enjoy it~
But if one doesn't feel comfortable simply because they're scared of people jumping at them because they got one thing wrong... Then clearly something is wrong and it needs to be fixed. Why this toxicity is allowed to be on the site in the first place is baffling.

Because people have different ideas of what constitutes too much criticism or open aggression. I mean sure we can all agree that if someone is sharing inappropriate (re:nude) photos of themselves or if they're asking you to write smut they're probably crossing a line.

Or if someone is calling you a slur or stalking you across the site that's obviously not okay either.

But those are extreme cases. Not all of the toxic behavior is that upfront and there are of course people from other sites where such things ARE common and they've simply become gunshy to it.

You look at the discussion board there all kinds of topics about people who are frustrated when they're partners leave. On the surface that's flat rude. But as I've said so many times I practically recite it in my sleep - its honestly probably a matter of avoiding conflict.

I used to do it myself I would get uncomfortable or bored and just leave a roleplay without a word. Mostly because I just didn't like conflict and didn't want folks to be angry at me. And because I've had people get super shitty with me when I do try to mention something because god forbid I have an opinion of my own. Granted the worst were on another site but you deal with toxic bullshit long enough you just get flat over it everywhere. And I've heard enough stories from friends on this site to think there are some bad eggs floating around here too.

So it's a combination of not being comfortable with conflict and a few instances dealing with really shitty people.

And again this is stuff I've grown used too. Not everyone has that kind of experience to fall back on or just natural assertiveness to combat it.

 

[Jules8008]

I usually play more males than female, but it depends on my mood.

 

[Alyxsandre]

Because people have different ideas of what constitutes too much criticism or open aggression. I mean sure we can all agree that if someone is sharing inappropriate (re:nude) photos of themselves or if they're asking you to write smut they're probably crossing a line.

Or if someone is calling you a slur or stalking you across the site that's obviously not okay either.

But those are extreme cases. Not all of the toxic behavior is that upfront and there are of course people from other sites where such things ARE common and they've simply become gunshy to it.

You look at the discussion board there all kinds of topics about people who are frustrated when they're partners leave. On the surface that's flat rude. But as I've said so many times I practically recite it in my sleep - its honestly probably a matter of avoiding conflict.

I used to do it myself I would get uncomfortable or bored and just leave a roleplay without a word. Mostly because I just didn't like conflict and didn't want folks to be angry at me. And because I've had people get super shitty with me when I do try to mention something because god forbid I have an opinion of my own. Granted the worst were on another site but you deal with toxic bullshit long enough you just get flat over it everywhere. And I've heard enough stories from friends on this site to think there are some bad eggs floating around here too.

So it's a combination of not being comfortable with conflict and a few instances dealing with really shitty people.

And again this is stuff I've grown used too. Not everyone has that kind of experience to fall back on or just natural assertiveness to combat it.

I'm pretty sure there's a very distinct line between criticism (ie: "your character doesn't have any noticeable flaws. Is there perhaps something you can add?" or "actually, there are some trans people who don't want to transition nor do they have body disphoria! So it might be a good idea not to generalize") and open aggression (ie, use of curse words, phrases like "how dare you try to play characters outside of your gender. cishets shouldn't play anything they don't personally know" or even just "your character sucks." or "we don't want you here.") Recognizing that type of language is very easy.

Personally, though, I see no problem with people voicing their frustration with being ditched, so long as they're not being aggressive about it. "One of my partners just ditched me :/ I was really looking forward to our rp but I guess I can't really do anything about it..." vs "I can't believe my f**king partner. They just up and vanished. Seriously?"
Two very different responses.

And then we have the fact that this site is very, VERY over-protective about its users, if anything, they're trigger-happy about sending people warning points for whatever behavior that may have broken the rules.
So it's not a question of being able to confront the people, it's just a matter of reporting them. As far as I'm aware, reports are anonymous, or rather, they'll keep you anonymous so long as you hadn't confronted the person before and given them a reason to think you reported them. As long as you have the proof, I'm sure RPN will have your back. Nobody needs to deal with toxic people who hold them back from exploring things they want to explore.

 

[rae2nerdy]

I'm pretty sure there's a very distinct line between criticism (ie: "your character doesn't have any noticeable flaws. Is there perhaps something you can add?" or "actually, there are some trans people who don't want to transition nor do they have body disphoria! So it might be a good idea not to generalize") and open aggression (ie, use of curse words, phrases like "how dare you try to play characters outside of your gender. cishets shouldn't play anything they don't personally know" or even just "your character sucks." or "we don't want you here.") Recognizing that type of language is very easy.

Personally, though, I see no problem with people voicing their frustration with being ditched, so long as they're not being aggressive about it. "One of my partners just ditched me :/ I was really looking forward to our rp but I guess I can't really do anything about it..." vs "I can't believe my f**king partner. They just up and vanished. Seriously?"
Two very different responses.

And then we have the fact that this site is very, VERY over-protective about its users, if anything, they're trigger-happy about sending people warning points for whatever behavior that may have broken the rules.
So it's not a question of being able to confront the people, it's just a matter of reporting them. As far as I'm aware, reports are anonymous, or rather, they'll keep you anonymous so long as you hadn't confronted the person before and given them a reason to think you reported them. As long as you have the proof, I'm sure RPN will have your back. Nobody needs to deal with toxic people who hold them back from exploring things they want to explore.

And my thought is it's just one of those things that if you don't have a frame of reference for it then they're isn't anything I can do to explain it you.

But I do appreciate you being open minded enough to try, although I think we've kind of exhausted this line of dialogue.

 

[Alyxsandre]

And my thought is it's just one of those things that if you don't have a frame of reference for it then they're isn't anything I can do to explain it you.

But I do appreciate you being open minded enough to try, although I think we've kind of exhausted this line of dialogue.

I guess I'm just confused on what you think I'm saying? Do you mean I don't understand toxicity and trying to cope with it? I'm just not sure what it is that you're trying to say.

I'm just trying to say that nobody should ever feel threatened or insecure in a site like RoleplayNation because the mods will have your back if you're being harassed or encounter toxic users. I mean, every single post has the "report" button, and the user being reported will never know who reported them. I don't... understand why that's hard to understand?

 

[Silvana]

To be honest, I enjoy roleplaying as a trap male. Does that count?

 

[rae2nerdy]

I guess I'm just confused on what you think I'm saying? Do you mean I don't understand toxicity and trying to cope with it? I'm just not sure what it is that you're trying to say.

I'm just trying to say that nobody should ever feel threatened or insecure in a site like RoleplayNation because the mods will have your back if you're being harassed or encounter toxic users. I mean, every single post has the "report" button, and the user being reported will never know who reported them. I don't... understand why that's hard to understand?

The idea that people are just going to be comfortable with reporting something, that they're going to know that they CAN report someone, or that reporting someone will ultimately help the situation.

As I said not all situations that are toxic are in such a way that the person can get punished for it.

Ex. Someone who lies about their age so they can do mature ( site sanctioned ) contact with others. I would consider that to be toxic if only because your clearly going against the wishes of your partner by lying to them about your age.

But as far as I know as long as they aren't pushing the envelope into actual smut territory they aren't doing anything they could get reported for.

And again each person has a different level of what they consider inappropriate or aggressive behavior. So just telling people - hey someone makes you uncomfortable just report them. Isn't easy and it isn't even necessarily all that helpful although I understand you mean for it to be.

That is what I meant. If you don't have a basic understanding of that kind of anxiety and discomfort with conflict than you're not going to get the point I'm trying to make.

As I said I can appreciate that you're trying but it's just a different way of looking at things, one i don't think I can get across if you don't understand the basic mentality behind it.

Add to that we've kind of gotten off topic from the original point . As we're kind of talking beyond the scope of - what genders do you like to play and why?

 

[Alyxsandre]

The idea that people are just going to be comfortable with reporting something, that they're going to know that they CAN report someone, or that reporting someone will ultimately help the situation.

As I said not all situations that are toxic are in such a way that the person can get punished for it.

Ex. Someone who lies about their age so they can do mature ( site sanctioned ) contact with others. I would consider that to be toxic if only because your clearly going against the wishes of your partner by lying to them about your age.

But as far as I know as long as they aren't pushing the envelope into actual smut territory they aren't doing anything they could get reported for.

And again each person has a different level of what they consider inappropriate or aggressive behavior. So just telling people - hey someone makes you uncomfortable just report them. Isn't easy and it isn't even necessarily all that helpful although I understand you mean for it to be.

That is what I meant. If you don't have a basic understanding of that kind of anxiety and discomfort with conflict than you're not going to get the point I'm trying to make.

As I said I can appreciate that you're trying but it's just a different way of looking at things, one i don't think I can get across if you don't understand the basic mentality behind it.

Add to that we've kind of gotten off topic from the original point . As we're kind of talking beyond the scope of - what genders do you like to play and why?

Oooh okay now I get it. You're talking about people having different points of what they consider "toxic" vs "people being people."
But no I actually used to be very sensitive when it came to critique when I was younger, so bad that I'd go so far as to rip up my artwork or delete everything I had done if somebody said something bad about my stuff XD And I'm absolutely terrible about confrontation. I only do it in my own roleplays if I absolutely need to, but more out of the safety of my fellow roleplayers (as a GM) than for my own comfort ahaha.
Anything else, I usually just walk away, myself. Tough skin sorta thing where you can just disregard people being butts.

But yes, people certainly shouldn't go reporting everyone just because they make them uncomfortable x'D That's no good at all.
But if there's genuine reason to do it, then yes x'D Please don't hesitate.

As for on-topic-ness
I typically don't care but it's really more of a habit I've had since my early days XD
Males, IMO, typically have a lot more stigma going against them and in lots of media you see them being pretty stereotypical, so that may be part of the reason why I enjoy playing male characters more often than not. I enjoy going against the stereotype. I'm pretty sure over 50% of my characters are male eUe; I'd go so far as to say 80% of them are. That said, my female characters also follow a similar pattern—I enjoy going against the stereotype and make them very complex.

Agender's my second go-to. If not my first these days XD There's something rather liberating about removing that aspect (gender) in characters so that you can just focus on who they are and why.

 

[rae2nerdy]

As for on-topic-ness
I typically don't care but it's really more of a habit I've had since my early days XD
Males, IMO, typically have a lot more stigma going against them and in lots of media you see them being pretty stereotypical, so that may be part of the reason why I enjoy playing male characters more often than not. I'm pretty sure over 50% of my characters are male eUe; I'd go so far as to say 80% of them are. That said, my female characters also follow a similar pattern—I enjoy going against the stereotype and make them very complex.

Agender's my second go-to. If not my first these days XD There's something rather liberating about removing that aspect (gender) in characters so that you can just focus on who they are and why.

Actually I've never known people to really put any particular stereotype into a gender. I mean outside of really poorly written romance but I don't think I've ever had anyone really treat my male characters any different to my female characters. I mean I don't really do romance so I guess that could be a difference.

But even in the roleplays where I remember romance I don't think I ever saw it put like

Ooh girly girl meet studly boy and they fall in lurve or anything.

it was ooh this character likes that character and they happen to be the gender that the particular players wanted for their individual pairing.

I actually can't think of a single character who used gender stereotypes. Which actually feels like a failing I should definitely be looking into so huh I'll have to look into that for my upcoming roleplays

 

[Peacemaker .45]

Playing male or female for me is one of those things that it depends. Some RP’s seem to be better played as a male, others a female. It really depends on the RP for me, and the story I’m trying to tell with the character I create. I play both, but it depends, again, on the RP and the kind of story I’m looking to tell with the character.

 

[nighty]

I do a lot of both genders. Though I have counted up my characters before and discovered that most of my primary characters and a higher number of mine lean towards the opposite gender of what I am. I don’t know exactly why but oh well.

 

[Mattt4004]

I do both genders although i do tend to use mine more.

 

[boredhuman]

I generally play a female npc if I want to but never my characters

 

[a r i e s]

I really enjoy being able to put myself into the head space of different characters, so I don't let anything limit me!

 

[Squared]

I usually play male characters, even though (I guess) I'm female. It just feels more comfortable to me? Sometimes I feel guilty cause like, there need to be more interesting female characters out there in media, but it's just easier for me to play it that way. Oh well.