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Fandom Books, Libraries, and Other Sirius Issues

Arabella Cauwell

Arabella Cauwell

Harry Potter and Asian Drama Ambassador
Title: Books, Libraries, and Other Sirius Issues
Fandom: Harry Potter - Marauders Era
Pairing: Sirius Black x Remus Lupin
Place: Hogwarts - 6th Year
Summary: Remus has been spending far too much time in the Library, or so Sirius thinks. Sirius decides to make sure that Remus spends more time with him, by attempting to make the library unbearable.
~

Sirius Orion Black was well known throughout the halls of Hogwarts for a great many things. He was known for his lineage, as the Black Family did cast a long shadow. He was known to be the black sheep of that family, which was funny, because for a family so into the dark arts that actually made him rebel to being good instead of the usual route. He was known for his looks, charisma, wit sure, but also for taking things to far, not knowing when he crossed a line, and being…well a but nuts.

Indeed, most rational people would understand that their friends had lives that did not always include other friends. They would likely contact their friends in some manner and plan a get together, or perhaps have a rational conversation about their feelings and decide on a compromise if they felt neglected. They certainly would not be irrationally jealous…especially when the jealousy had nothing to do with a human being…but rather a place. Indeed, Sirius Orion Black, Gryffindor Hearthrob, infamous Marauder, and practically Pureblood Royalty was jealous of a place. The place in question: The Library.

According the twisted mind of one Sirius Black, Remus had been spending way too much time in the library as of late. Not that Remus hadn’t always enjoyed what Sirius referred to as ‘depraved pastimes,’ or rather studying in the library, but it seemed to have escalated into more frequency recently. Everyone knew that leaving Sirius to his own devices was a terrible, risky idea. Nevertheless communication must not have been as frequent as prior, for Remus and James had both not been around as much lately. Merlin, even Peter kept disappearing on him, not that Sirius minded as much.

Sirius knew what James’ problem was, one Lily Evans. He had gone along with the fun when Lily had been turning his mate down, but as she got more compliant, Sirius got more annoyed with it. But there was not much he could do on that one. Unfortunately his friend had been snatched and he’d not stopped it. He just hoped that James would inevitably return to at least 50 percent himself one day.

Sirius could understand being left for someone your head over heels for, he could be left by people he didn’t understand why was in his group, but left for a library? That Sirius would not tolerate. Besides, when he stopped to think about it, Remus was really the current most important person to him. Sure James was a close best friend. He had given him a roof over his head, support, helped change him, stopped him from not only becoming a murder but making a friend a murder himself, invited him into his family and so many wonderful things, but James had also seemed to mostly ignore him for a Red head named Lily Evans. It had hurt Sirius a lot more once he noticed that Lily was no longer hexing James into next week, that she was somehow changing him and Sirius had liked James just the way he was.

James followed her like he was under a spell and Sirius couldn’t stop it. Well he could, but he was pretty sure that James would hate him for it. So he’d watched and tried to adapt and that’s when Remus had come to the plate for him. Sirius had always liked Remus from the very first moment he met him. Remus had been funny then. In the early years many people questioned why James and Sirius befriended a bookworm like Remus and a lackey like Peter. Sirius couldn’t explain the Peter part himself. That had been James’ doing and Remus’ reinforcement. Sure Sirius enjoyed the praise, but where couldn’t he get that. But Sirius had never let anyone say something bad about Remus. He didn’t care what others thought. Didn’t want to hear the similarities between Remus and Snape and the questions of why Sirius and James were best friends with one and worst enemies with the other.

Sirius had no idea how anyone could compare Remus to that slimy git, and perhaps that was why, besides going after Snape because James didn’t like him, Sirius had always taken it a bit to far. James hated Snape, probably because Snape had once been close to Lily. Sirius hated Snape because James did and because others kept acting like Snape and Remus were similar, when Sirius knew there was no one else quite like Moony.

But you know where both of them did enjoy spending their free time? The Library.

Unless one was having an affair with a Ravenclaw or sneaking into the Restricted Section Sirius Black had no idea why one would willingly come to the library. Even now as he stood outside of it, planning its demise, he still practically growled at the door, his body cringing at the thought of actually entering it. Sirius had of course touched books before, but most of the time he used magic. Books were boring, lifeless objects that put small children to sleep and big children through exams. They were the least magical thing at Hogwarts and Sirius really didn’t understand why they had become so popular.

But he knew he had to be strong now. He had to infiltrate this dean of evil and rescue Remus from books, the library, and perhaps even himself. There was no time to waste. And so Sirius took a deep breath and slipped into the library.

The first word that he though as he entered was stuffy. Another might be claustrophobic. Sirius stumbled his way across the library to hide behind a stack of books looking and breathing as if he was in the middle of a duel and had been hit with a hex. A few students looked at him shocked that he would be in the library and acting so very…un-Sirius. He gave a few people glares to warn them to look away and leave him alone, after all he couldn’t have them giving away his position. He had a plan to make the library as unattractive to Remus as it was to himself. But first he had to find him.

Sirius knew that if Remus was not in the library now he soon would be. James had stolen the Marauders Map earlier, which had caused Sirius to swear a bit more than he’d care to admit, but also meant he couldn’t pinpoint Remus’ exact location. In other words James’ obsession with Lily Evans was once again ruining Sirius’ day. But no matter, the library drew Remus like a magnet. It was only a matter of time until Sirius found him there.
 
Remus Lupin had started to have a very predictable schedule the last months, going on the second. Going by a pattern that someone could figure out by following him a single day: If he wasn't eating, sleeping or in class... he would be at the library. Studying something new all the time. He had always been studious, even reading more than average, but now it was almost bonkers. He acted like he was always cramming for NEWTs, sitting by a table near a window and the only moving part of him would be his eyes trailing over the pages. Sometimes he would cross his legs, uncross, put his head in his hand, flip a page, but that was it.

Maybe people wouldn't have stared or whispered so much, if Remus hadn't previously been an active participant of his friends' prank and goofs. Yet lately marauder activity had honestly been minimal....

Going from seeing each other every hour of the day, to suddenly spending several days apart had been a little bit of an adjustment.

It would be a stretch to say the Marauders had 'split up'; they still saw each other all the time. It was just more... practical. They sat together for dinner, they greeted in the halls and they paired up in classes. No one was mad at anyone, or avoiding someone. So Remus didn't know why he, for a long time, felt like their group was falling apart; just because they weren't doing their usual mischief and hanging out in secret parts of the castle, didn't mean they weren't still close as blood. But... something had changed.

The first falling domino had been Lily finally giving their love-struck James a chance. Which was a bloody miracle, if he had ever seen one. He fully enjoyed her company, because she was clever and incredibly kind. However, as many new couples, James and Lily often wanted time for dates and private moments. Remus, Sirius and Peter would often be a trio when that happened. Reluctantly, but gradually Remus chose to accept that James was there less frequent, and decided to just be happy that his endless efforts had paid of. He knew one person who wasn't as happy about that arrangement though...

These were the days he got much closer to Sirius. He could tell that James was a missing piece, but they still had a lot of fun. One day Sirius had seemed especially bummed out, so Remus had been the one to suggest that they skipped classes (which was rare the last few years). Using James' cloak, they had snuck off to Hogsmeade through the Weeping Willow to drink butterbeer and treats. He remembered that trip well, because he had been laughing so much his sides hurt. They had a few more good evenings, but that had been the last real hangout in a long time.

Suddenly Peter started disappearing more often as well. They had spied on him on the map, but the rat animagus was always new places and he didn't seem to want to talk about it if they asked. Yet, when Peter was with them, he would be his normal self and acting like he always did, so Remus wasn't sure if he had actually gotten new friends or were just in some kind of trouble. Remus had to force himself to see that as normal too. Yet, there was no denying it... were they all growing apart?

It had given him a bit of a shock.

Maybe because their friendship was so deeply rooted. Besides their good chemistry as pals, his three friends had gone as far as to turn themselves into animagus for him; to support him doing his midnight changes. They always stood up for one another, and he could never imagine betraying them, which was especially important these days where the dark was rising. It was like they were family.

So yes, the sudden realisation that eventually they might be going their separate ways had shocked him a little. The idea that he might not have as strong friendship as he thought, and eventually have to fend for himself, with his monthly... habit. Suddenly life beyond Hogwarts entered his mind way to realistically and that's when he started hitting the books. Remus had always been reading more than average, but now he was practically blasting through the library as if his hands couldn't flip the pages fast enough. It didn't even cross his mind that he now, also was adding to the damage of newfound distance.

Which was why, yet another evening, Remus was sitting in his usual seat in the library. Scarred face in a calm expression, green eyes scanning the pages of Magical Items Vol. 22 and too deep in thought to even notice the looming presence behind him.
 
It had taken a bit of time, particularly since Sirius Black was inexplicably in what looked like an elaborate game of hide and go seek as he kept low and practically crawled through the library searching for his Mark. Remus may have had a usual spot of course, but since Sirius very rarely entered the library he had no idea where that could have been. But eventually he found Remus and was quite giddy about it to say the least. Of course he had to stay quiet, a phenomenal task for one Sirius Black, but apparently not impossible.

Sirius could not see Remus’ face from the position he was in behind the stack of books, behind the resident werewolf. Although after pulling a few books gently off of the shelves he had managed to give himself a bit of a window with which to see Remus from the back and to be able to point his wand when needed.

Sirius Orion Black had always been a prankster, but he had not used half of what was in his arsenal, and Remus for certain was not his usual target. Of course Sirius had no intention of harming Remus per say, but he could certainly make the other boy uncomfortable. And while he didn’t relish the idea of Remus even being uncomfortable he was very much able to imagine the joyful times to be had when Remus disliked the library as much as him and boy was Sirius ready to make that a possibility. He was so ready that he had a few surprises, one of which even he was shocked that he’d managed, but that was to be stored for later, if Remus stayed long enough that it became necessary.

He looked around making sure none one was watching as he reached into his bag and covered himself with the invisibility cloak, very happy that James hadn’t ruined everything by taking that too. Of course he’d probably want Lily seeing him doing whatever annoying romantic gesture he had in mind anyway. But Sirius did not want to think about that right now. He had plans. For now he would start off slowly and see how Remus reacted to a little heat.

Taking out his wand and angling himself out of sight of even the peephole he’d made himself through the bookshelves, despite already being under the invisibility cloak. Sirius began a somewhat complicated move before pointing his wand just barely through the space there, hitting the spot surrounding Remus with a stream of hot air. The library was already a bit warm, but Sirius always did like to heat things up. He ducked down afterwards making sure to not be caught as he reached inside the bag at his hip and pulled out his next trick. Stink pellets. With any luck Remus would believe it was just a few other library goers with a bad smell, but it wouldn’t endear him to stay now would it?

Sirius snickered internally as he threw the pellets through the peephole, which is when he remembered something rather important. Having just recently been in animagus form his nose was still extremely sensitive to smell and he’d just created a bad one and had to keep it quiet. Needless to say it was not his best plan of yet, but somehow he was keeping it together, although had the invisibility cloak not been on him he would have looked even crazier than he normally did. Once he had developed a way of breathing through his mouth again, Sirius looked back through the hole to see how Remus was reacting so far.
 
Was it getting warmer? Remus tugged a little in his collar and looked up from his book. There were definitely people here who could generate heat, but not enough to explain the sudden desert climate. He tugged his tie loose, and pulled a little more in the shirt. His eyes searched a little for what could have made it so warm, but in the end he turned his eyes back down to the page. Deciding that it was probably just his imagination and that it might have happened while he had sat there and focused. He breathed out heavily from the warmth, and put his finger along the next sentence to continue.

However, as soon as he started reading the next line on the page, something even worse happened than the temperature. Remus cringed back by the sudden attack on his sense of smell.

"Urg! Merlin's beard," he exclaimed under his breath, and his hand flung up to his nose and mouth. A stench hit him. Something foul and rotten. It smelled like last time they had created a stink bomb in potions class. He felt it creep into his nostrils, despite his protective hand, and potently make him feel sick.

Remus coughed and reached over to snatch his wand from his rope, fumbling through the pocket until he got a hold. He turned toward the window behind him and with a quick swipe, he flung it open. Then he moved his hand from his mouth, making a face, and mumbled out. "Ventus Jinx!"

A gust of wind swirled from his wand, and spiralled around him, making his open books flutter their pages. His hair rose a bit as the air whirled around him, and temporarily dimming the scent. He coughed one more time, and scrunched his face a bit. It picked up the smell, and without him knowing, slid the pellets back under the shelf. Then he directed the magical wind out the window, and lowered his wand. The pages fell back in place, and his hair staying messed up on his head.

"Shh!" Came a sharp hiss from a few shelves away.

Remus looked toward the witch who had hushed him, and nodded. "Sorry..." he answered apologetically, and rubbed his nose, still feeling the prickling of the nasty smell linger. He still wasn't sure where it had come from, but his prankster radar was flashing red. Suspiciously he gave his surroundings a once-over, eyes clearly not trusting the area anymore.

Yet, after a moment, he slowly slid back in his seat and left the window open. Turning his eyes back at the page, but a part of him still a bit on alert now.
 
So the stink pellets may not have been one of Sirius’ better ideas. Not only had he attacked himself with it inadvertently, but Remus had been quick to deal with it and still seemed quite content to stay in the place-that-shall-not-be-named according to Sirius Black. Still, Sirius was nothing if not determined. He only took a second to glare at the student who dared to shush Remus, before deciding that if he didn’t want to get caught he was going to have to make his actions less focused on Remus’ section.

Thankfully the lovely shusher had so clearly volunteered when messing with his friends. Sirius tapped his wand against the top of his hands a few times as he thought it over, and then he got it. Scurrying a few paces to the shelves just behind the shusher, Sirius pulled out a few books to make a new peep hole before waving his wand at the table the shusher was working on and whispering,

“Mobiliarbus.”

Instantly the wooden chair the other boy was sitting on rose a few inches off of the ground and Sirius turned his wand in the direction he wanted the chair to go, which was just out of reach of the other boys book. Sirius enjoyed the shocked and then annoyed look on the boys face as he was moved, but was less than pleased when the boy assumed that it was Remus who had moved him, since he had told Remus to stop. In response to being moved away from his book he stood up, grabbed another book off the shelf, and hurled it in Remus’ direction.

Before Sirius looked over to see if Remus had actually been hit, he walked over, still under the invisibility cloak, and kicked the other boy so hard in the butt that the boy went flying over the table he’d been using and hit straight into the bookcase behind it. Sirius glared at the boy, though the other couldn’t see and though he couldn’t reveal himself now since the invisibility cloak was very much a secret. So as the other boy growled, “What the hell was that?!” Sirius ran to his original spot in the bookcase across from Remus and looked through the peephole there to see if Remus was at least alright.

‘See,’ he thought to himself as he checked his friend over, ‘one just does not meet respectable people in such a stuffy establishment.’
 
All the surrounding people reacted to the small exclaim the boy made, when his rogue chair suddenly floated off the ground. Remus gaze lifting as well. His face split in an amused smirk, as he recognised his "shusher", who was balancing to keep onto the furniture. Then his smile fell though, because the boy singled in on him and tossed a book quite forcefully. "Wai-?" he began, managing to shield his face with an arm.

"What the hell was that?" the boy demanded. Remus straightened back up.

"I think the simplest conclusion is that we're haunted," he answered, and eyes seemed to search the shelves a little. Now he was starting to have an idea what was going on. Either Peeves was having some fun with students, someone was getting back at him or it was someone even more familiar to him, playing games. He was counting on the latter. Yet, the Shusher didn't seem to appreciate his answer, and pulled out his wand. Remus noticed and lifted his hands with a diplomatic, yet slightly strained smile. "...really there is no reason to- merlin's-!"

Lucky for his quick reflexes. He managed to swipe up his wand from the table, when he saw the boy make more books float upwards from the surrounding people. Instantly they flung toward Remus, and in the last second he managed to avert them with a counter-spell that send them off to the sides. A girl who had lost her book let out a 'hey!'.

"Expelliarmus!" Remus countered and the boy's wand flung out his hand. Then he let out a sigh. "I'm a prefect. Why would I-" He dodged a book coming from one of his friends now. Suddenly the girl stood up, having not seen the initial fight and hurled a book in the back of the head of the Shusher for taking her book. By the time Remus re-appeared back up, more people had started throwing books around, the situation escalating. There didn't seem to be any teachers close by, so the library suddenly turned into a warzone of flying books.

While he was trying to come up with a good spell for stopping the ruckus, another book aimed for his head.
 
Thanks to the shenanigans of one Sirius Black the library was now in chaos. A book war had erupted and hilariously, it made Sirius suddenly interested in the library itself, or rather at least appreciative that it housed objects that could be thrown with great affect, even better, or rather more dramatically than food. Of course a typical Ravenclaw or general bibliophile would have looked on in horror at the chaos and general disrespect for literature that had unfolded, but as a non-book learner Sirius was actually amused.

The library now appeared to be a war zone, which left Sirius somewhat giddily excited. He was a bit annoyed now to be under the cloak, for he so wanted to be part of it. He’d never cared about getting into trouble, rather the opposite mostly as it was just a further stain on the Black family name as his parents said, which Sirius particularly enjoyed. But he couldn’t give away that James or anyone of the marauder’s owned an invisibility cloak. They were after all rare and it was already strange that he didn’t wear it from the dorm to the library, but he supposed he was always a bit of a risk taker.

For now he contented himself with continuing to bombard the shusher on all sides from various directions so as to confuse the boy, who was clearly quite pissed and now, thanks to Moony no longer had a wand to fight with. Despite having ultimately practically started or at least escaladed things, Sirius was more fond of the idea of blaming the shusher over his own self, at least this time. He was distracted from Remus for a few minutes due to his delight of chaos and his focus being on annoying the shusher and for fun the occasional bop at someone else, but when he turned he noticed that a book was heading straight at Remus and Remus looked a bit unprepared.

Sirius refused to have Remus harmed by such a thing, but he needed more room then the peephole he had created, granted it had gotten larger with people flinging the books. So still under the invisibility cloak Sirius stepped in front of the book shelf and called out,

“Protego!” and then jumped as close to in front of Remus as he could to block the book, because of course it mostly protects the caster.

But of course as soon as he did it he let out an,

“Eep!” since he very well may have given himself away.

But until Remus said something or did something he still had hope, particularly in that amount of chaos. So in case he was in luck he attempted to make a run for it, back behind the book shelf.
 
"Protego!"

The familiar voice made him whip his head around, to look for the spell-caster. Remus lifted his hands surprised when a book slammed into an invisible force in front of him, and dropping down uselessly. One page ripping loose and fluttering to the ground. He might have hesitated, if it hadn't been for the small exclaim being his final clue. The Gryffindor lunged forward in the empty air, grasping out to get a hold of something solid. his fingers brushed something made of thin cloth, and that was enough to seal his suspicion.

He followed blindly down the aisle of some bookshelves, dodging an oncoming piece of rogue literature before he was behind the wooden shelves. Back in the library the scene had evolved, and now no one probably remembered who had been the initial target. It was a bit too noisy to be listening for footsteps, but that didn't deter him from making a guess to where the intruder had headed. Touching and reaching, so any outsider would probably think he looked like he was bonkers.

"Padfoot? Prongs?" he asked under his breath, wand lowered.

Then he trailed his hands along the shelves to see if the person (likely friend) had stopped. Remus threw a quick look back over his shoulder, to check for students and saw that no one was here; everyone likely fighting the war. In the case that his fingers would catch onto soft cloth again, he would grab the edge of the cloak and slip under. In the case that the culprit was already far gone, he would have no choice but to go back to the warzone to retrieve the book he had left there.
 
Sirius nearly peed himself when he heard his nickname. He had felt a slight tug at the invisibility cloak while trying to run, but he had merely thought it was the tail end of a book, since a ton of them were flying around. His name had come up first but for a few seconds he held on to hope since Remus had also mentioned Prongs. So the playing field was narrowed down, but there was still another contender for the culprit so he still attempted to keep out of Remus’ reach.

As if sensing him, Remus moved closer and closer in a very un-Sirius fashion, Sirius froze. He couldn’t think, even about escaping the area and so he just stood there in horror as Remus finally grasped on to the cloak.

His mind reeled as he tried to think of an excuse, think of anything. Could he pass as Prongs at such a close proximity? No, decidedly not without planning, and he certainly wasn’t holding a polyjuice potion in his pocket. How angry would Remus be that he’d messed up the library? Did he actually accomplish his goal? He wasn’t sure, but he certainly knew that he would have a harder time now convincing Remus to hangout with him specifically after all this…or would he?

As much as he knew Remus there were some things about people that one just didn’t know until they experienced it. Remus tolerated a lot in his friendship with the marauders, even specifically with his friendship with Sirius himself. Could he tolerate this? Would he yell or laugh? Sirius’ palms began to sweat as he thought and the invisibility cloak lifted letting in Remus. He stared across at the other boy in the dark before weakly half-whispering,

“Fancy meeting you here.”

It was a silly statement, but maybe it would diffuse the situation and it was decidedly better than his initial thought to say, ‘So do you come here often?’ He stared, adjusting to the darkness as he glanced upwards into Remus’ eyes, still afraid of what he might find there for all the bravado he pretended he had at the moment when he spoke.
 
Victoriously Remus' fingers felt the fabric to his touch, fine as silk and invisible to the eye. He dodged underneath James' heirloom, and his nose was suddenly less than a inch from none other than Sirius Black. Sirius' familiar grey eyes looking back at him, seeming a bit apprehensive to see him, but despite that he was still throwing a playful turn of phrase. His greeting made Remus furrow his eyebrows with a scoff.

"Hi..." he said very slowly, with a hesitant hint of a smile, more perplexed than angry. "...What in the world are you doing in the library?" he whispered back at him, because he knew Sirius didn't believe in reading over action when he could be choosing.

Bam! A loud thud against their bookcase alerted Remus to look upward. He froze for a second. The books were sliding to the far edge of their shelves apprehensively, likely from an impact on the other side. For a second he though they wouldn't fall, but then as if he jinxed it, several pieces of literature went raining down. He swung his arm around Sirius and pulled his friend with him out of the way. The books slamming into the ground behind them, and piling up the mess that this place was becoming.

Before further questioning, he looked over toward his table and saw that his book was still there. He looked a bit relieved at the sight, since it had actually been a book he needed for a class. "Accio," he whispered and pointed his wand at the book. It sprung up from the table and toward them, and slipped in under the invisibility cloak with the two marauders.
 
Sirius literally hissed when he heard the word library said aloud, which honestly wasn’t going to help him make up any excuses as to why he was there. He was happy to see that Remus was not particularly angry with him though. Of course, Sirius was somewhat indulged by the group as a whole at times for many of his antics, which probably was not good for his general development as a person, but he supposed they gave him some slack because of his upbringing.

Sirius was about to answer when all of a sudden there was a loud sound and then Remus was pulling him towards him and out of the way. Sirius was suddenly nervous for other reasons as he was practically held by Remus. His heartbeat sped up and his face flushed, which was abnormal for someone generally referred to as a Casanova. Of course Remus did not seem to think much of the situation himself, at least it didn’t seem like it as he casually accio-ed his book, which was when Sirius went from being flustered, straight back to being pissed. Suddenly he was quite ready to explain what he was doing at the library, but since he didn’t want the cloak to be discovered he pulled Remus a few rows down by the boy’s wrist, somewhat away from the book war, looked around until he found no one, and pulled it off of both of them, quickly stuffing the cloak inside the bag, somehow still miraculously bouncing against his hip.

He glared up at Remus as he ran a hand through his hair, pointed to the book in Remus possession and stomped his right foot hard on the ground as he said,

“That is exactly why I’m here at the Place-that-shall-not-be-named!” Sirius snapped, “we almost just got crushed by these evil objects of distraction and the first thing you do is accio a book directly to yourself while talking to me?! Do you love these things and this place so much that you have to practically live here?”

Just thinking about that possibility caused Sirius to turn around, grab the first book on the shelf that his hands could reach and push a good deal of force against it, knocking over a good portion of books on the same shelf in his wake in order to get out some aggression, before rounding back to look at Remus,

“Is there something so wrong with me that our group has given up on me? That you have? Originally I thought I was forgiven for the last major issue that came up in our friendship, but now I have to wonder. James is chasing after that annoying redhead who stole him, Peter is nowhere to be found but that I can deal with, but you? You specifically come to a place you know I’d not step a foot in? Why? Is it me?! Is this how you and everyone gets space from me?”

He could tell he was getting louder. Once again that part of him that was out of control had surfaced. He tried to shove that crazy part of himself down, before people began to notice, before he ruined something else, but he couldn’t help himself. He’d never done well with being alone or when he wasn’t being paid attention to, and ultimately there were two people in this world that he could not bear to imagine avoiding him or not in his life, James and Remus. But James seemed to no longer care unless Sirius was making trouble, getting in his way, or had a family issue, and Remus…Remus always seemed like he was the most in touch with others feelings, but then even he’d gone and avoided him.

“Do you know what happens to my mind when I have a long time alone to think?” Sirius hated how pathetic he sounded, which helped him calm down some, he was acting irrationally, it wasn’t Remus’ job to babysit him or stay with him all the time and it was unfair of him to push the whole groups issue on him. Sirius should have just made some more friends to fill in the gaps, to give less concerns to his best friends, but it was so hard for him to trust anyone. He had seen such darkness and manipulation most of his life so when he was a friend he was fiercely loyal, but also fiercely needy. It wasn’t really fair to them.

Sirius let out a self deprecating laugh as he stepped back and pressed the back of his neck against the bookcase behind him,

“I know it’s not your job to be with me all the time and I know I’m being irrational and dumb like always but I just hate change so much. Especially this one. I had so much once and now all I can see is it slipping through my fingers. James abandoning me for a girl, Peter for secrets, and you for books. But there’s nothing for me to hold on to. No hobbies that aren’t cruel, no happy thoughts to distract me. There’s only the darkness. No wonder you all are starting to go your own ways come to think of it. What do I have to offer, but neediness and destruction?”

Sirius was a very emotional person, but from a very young age he was taught to hide it. His parents told him not to show weakness and when he rebelled against them as he aged he’d refused to let them see him cry no matter how harsh it got. Even when his name was eradicated from the Black family tree. Even when he was kicked out. Even when he had to leave his younger brother, who he’d always loved despite being compared to, in the hands of his parents. But now they wanted to spill over. Still he couldn’t let anyone see his face when he was like this. The shame he felt quadrupled at the thought of doing such a thing in public, especially in such a place as this.

And was this really the place to have this discussion anyway. Sirius couldn’t think straight in this claustrophobic walls of books. He hated how he was being and how pathetic he looked. He had just wanted to scare Remus away from the library without getting caught and now neither had worked really. He let out a growl of frustration at himself as he turned and started to walk towards the exit door of the library just trying to keep himself together.
 
"What is it?" he whispered, when Sirius firmly dragged him away from the ruckus. Then his dark-haired friend turned toward him, cloak off and eyes roaring with emotion. Remus mouth closed slowly, as if registering that it was time to listen and not interrupt.

Remus went through a wide range of emotions in the span of Sirius' outburst. At first he found it a little comical and endearing how he was wildly calling the library 'the-place-that-shall-not-be-named' and books 'evil objects', throwing his hands around. Secondly, he turned wary when he started throwing the books; this was the point where he was the closest to interject, but then came the third emotion. Realisation and regret, maybe even a bit of sadness by his phrasing. It suddenly became less about the library and more about the marauders splitting up. In this case, specifically Remus having acted like he was cutting his friend out. The werewolf had thought he was the only one who was worrying about it, but it seemed that Sirius was very aware as well. Not just aware; he was angry about it. From his perspective Remus could see how it looked like he was avoiding him, even if it had honestly never been his intention.

His last words made his mouth drop in surprise. ".... No wonder you all are starting to go your own ways come to think of it. What do I have to offer, but neediness and destruction?”

"Sirius!" he intersected and he put his book down onto a nearby shelf quickly. As if proving to him that the book wasn't important to him. He saw that his friend was starting to leave and took a few quick steps over and grabbed his shoulder. "Nothing!" he blurted and turned the other toward him. When they were facing each other, his voice went surprisingly gentle, but his eyes deadly genuine. "...Nothing is more important to me than the marauders."

He let out a sigh and his eyes softened up. He slipped an arm around his shoulders, and held around him. "You're right about one thing though. You shouldn't be alone too much, you start thinking crazy," he reminded him and offered a small smile. Then he walked with him out of the library, still having one arm slung around him. He didn't admit that his thoughts had steered in the same direction. The two friends exited the library, because Remus could tell that Sirius wanted to leave the room. While walking down the hall saw a teacher hurriedly run toward the library with a student. Probably someone who had alerted her about the incident.

"I wasn't avoiding you," he clarified, when they were alone in the hall. Feeling like an explanation was in order, even if he was feeling a little apprehensive admitting it. He took in a breath, and then elaborated. His hand slipping down from around him. "...the reason I am always in the library is that, James and Lily made me think about... after Hogwarts," he looked a little thoughtful. "...and I thought, what would I be? Someone with my issues. Who would want to work with someone like me? Besides Dumbledore. I can't live with my parents my whole life, so my best option would be to be a teacher."

He send Sirius a side-glance. "I should have told you."

He dug into his bag all of a sudden, and pulled out a rustling item. He peeled off the outside paper a bit, enough to reveal the sight of square pieces of milk chocolate. He flashing him an urging gaze and pushed it toward him, for Sirius to pick off some of it. A peace-offering of sorts, and also because he had genuinely been nervous to hear some of the things Sirius had proclaimed earlier, and he had a theory that chocolate helped with unhappiness.
 
Sirius nearly jumped at the sudden interjection of his name, but was somewhat vindicated by Remus putting his book on the shelf. He was turned towards his lupine friend as Remus said words that Sirius wanted, and needed to hear as he said nothing was more important than the marauders. Sirius had always felt that way. The marauders were his everything, give or take Peter. Without James and Remus, Sirius didn’t know what he’d do.

His body relaxed as Remus put his arm around his shoulder and teased him for thinking crazy when he was alone. Sirius already knew that as a truth. He had pretty much proven that just a few minutes ago as a matter of fact. Allowing himself to be lead, just happy at being touched by Remus at all, Sirius listened to Remus closely.

Remus was working in the library because he was nervous about his future? Sirius was puzzled. Of course it was difficult for Sirius to understand how life would be like for Remus as a werewolf. This was mainly because Remus was so…normal outside of his ‘furry little problem.’ Indeed it was hard to think that a good, intelligent, charismatic, talented young wizard like Remus would not be accepted at any job he choose. Despite seeing the werewolf side of Remus many times, Sirius had never seen a problem with it. For him that was just a part of who Remus was, similar to how women ended up hormonal once a month and wanted to rip a guys head off. He never understood why it should effect whether one goes to school or not, or how one is treated. In fact, sometimes Sirius really wished that he could take Remus’ curse for him, as Sirius was already rather unhinged and if anyone was to be thought of as a monster, he felt it should have been him. Not kind, rational, good Remus.


“I’ll never understand wizarding society as long as I live. I’ve never known anything but it, yet it can be so unfair. How can this world of magic accept a monster like my cousin Bellatrix, but reject a gem like you? If I had a cleaner record I’d have joined politics and crushed their stupid laws against what they don’t understand and know about other beings. Unfortunately if I tried now it would involve an aweful lot of sleeping around and I’d really rather not. I guess I could try to convince James to do it, after all he’s become something of a goody-two-shoes as of late,” Sirius said with a sigh, calming down at the mention of someone else not liking it, “speaking of which I can’t stay with them forever even more so than you can’t live with yours forever, but I’m not really one who should be trusted living alone. So how about this…” he began looking Remus in the eyes, “I’ll get a job and an apartment and you can live with me.”

Sirius had been something of a charity case for a while now and lately it had begun to bug him. It wasn’t like he even supplied James with something anymore. Once he was entertainment at least, a brother at best, but lately James had Lily and didn’t need him. If anything he became more and more of a burden. He was sure that James wanted more family only events, particularly with Lily. Sirius had deluded himself for some time playing house and pretending to be one of them. But as kind as they were and as much as James wouldn’t say something, nor kick him out Sirius could feel it. He knew the end had come. Now that he had an idea of Remus’ feelings, at least about what to do and he knew his friend wasn’t dating he figured he could be useful again. If Remus needed a place outside of his parents and someone to at least be able to be with him for Moonlit nights then Sirius could at least be helpful there. Sirius was pretty sure he could make money in good or bad ways. He had never feared tough work, he had merely feared loneliness and isolation. If they could live together wouldn’t that solve either.

“Do you want to be a teacher Remmy?” he questioned looking for truth, “I think you could be anything you put your mind to if you fight hard enough. So if you want some time to think it over. If you need some time to fight for what you really want then let me be your support. A brilliant mind like yours should not go to waste, just because a bunch of stuck up pretend to be Purebloods don’t understand you. If you want to be a professor I’ll support that too, but someone like you should be making history, while others can only hope to become a footnote.”

Sirius was glad that he wasn’t being avoided and that there was someone else who missed the marauders and cared for them so much and so deeply as him. Also as far as their futures went Sirius could understand more what Remus was talking about then the other two. James would have no problem earning money. He knew what he wanted and how to get it. If James married Lily then they’d be financially set as she would be able to get many jobs as well. Peter may not have as many prospects as James, but he was not well known for good or bad, he would very likely find a job with the ministry and if his luck continued the way it had in school he’d manage just fine adjusting to another group. But Sirius was fairly well known and often thought of badly. He didn’t know what he wanted outside of not wanting to be compared with or under the influence of his family and their prejudices. And Remus’ only sin was something he couldn’t help, just for being a werewolf.

But Sirius knew he could make money if needed, if not have a career he wanted, not that he knew what that was. But he’d do anything if he could just help Remus with his dream if he had one. Dreams were such miracles to Sirius after all. The only dream Sirius knew he had without question was to not be alone and until Remus found his future partner and his dream was fulfilled

“What do you say Remmy, do you want to live with me?” he asked, his eyes focused on the other boy, breath as even as he could make it.
 
"What did you- a gem?" Remus laughed under his breath by his compliment, and touched his cheek lightly where the marking of the scars dented from his face. Long lines of scarring announcing to everyone that there was something a little off. "Yeah well..." he let the hand drop. "...until that revolution, I will just have to find loopholes, won't I?" he flashed him a smile. It was nice of Sirius to say, even if he had major doubts that anything would ever change in regards to werewolf policies. It was probably at the bottom of the ministry's agenda, and more likely on the rising dark lord's.

All such dull thoughts left him quickly though. His face twisting into true surprise, as if Sirius had just handed him the cheat-seat for all their exams. "You and me, living together?" he asked, when he suggested they got an apartment. He couldn't say the thought hadn't crossed his mind, but Sirius had always been... James'. They had always been the best friends, and lived together. Remus put out his hands. "It's not that I don't want to, but I thought you would be living with James honestly," he admitted truthfully. "...I'm sure he will be expecting you to move in after the last summer like you always do."

Honestly the thought of living with Sirius in the future was making him pretty happy. What a team they would be, probably struggling to get by daily, but it would be a lot of merry times without a doubt. When he saw that Sirius was looking over at him, he stopped walking and glanced back at him. Behind them one of the huge windows with one of the grant Hogwarts views. He sometimes noticed the little things when he looked, like his focusing gazes, the line of his nose, the strand of hair askew or how his collar was a bit crooked. All in all it was pretty clear to him why Sirius was popular. He was definitely handsome, and sometimes he found it ridiculous that his friend didn't just pick a girl if he hated to be alone so much. Although deep down maybe Remus didn't want him to pick one.

"I think I could teach alright," he confirmed and stuffed his hands in the pockets, suddenly averting his gaze, as if catching himself in something (like admiring his male friend's appearance).

He suddenly changed the subject. "Hey, why don't we go for some dinner?" he asked him.
 
Sirius was a bit confused when Remus questioned the gem part. Had he said it wrong? Did Remus consider it cheesy? He tilted his head in a very similar way that he did when he questioned things in his animagus form, but didn’t bother to comment as he listened to Remus’ next statement. He could tell that Remus didn’t believe it and Sirius, for all his wishing and fighting of the system, knew that the system was as hard to change as his mother’s mind. But loopholes were at least hope and if anyone could find a loophole it would be a marauder.

Sirius was surprised by Remus’ surprise about living together. Had it been such a crazy thought? He listened as Remus stated his conjecture. He supposed historically speaking yes, it might have once been James, but James was no longer his really, no matter what the other boy said. James now belonged to a red head who in Sirius’ opinion did not appreciate him half as much as any marauder. Sirius should have stopped James in the beginning, when it was just a little boy teasing a little girl. Instead like usually he had egged James on. It was good when Evans refused his friend. Then Sirius was still able to be the good guy on James’ side, give him pep talks and advice, whether purposely good or bad. But eventually it had gotten out of hand and now that Lily was going along with it, Sirius didn’t have a place there. So upon Remus assumption that he’d live with James Sirius could only give out a humorless laugh,

“You must have had your nose pretty far into those books Moony. James isn’t the same anymore. Sure he’s still kind enough to allow my presence, but I’m just in the way now. Love has changed James dramatically. He tries to change for her and yet has to pretend to be the same for me, each of us pulling him in different directions, but his head doesn’t turn my way anymore. I may be a fighter by nature, but I know when I’ve been defeated,” Sirius said sadly, but tried to lighten it up by adding, “I’ll tell you one thing it’s not often that Sirius Black is on the losing end of a flirtation.”

Sirius ran his fingers through his hair slowly and pensively, letting out a breath before continuing,

“I haven’t told him yet, or any one really, but I’ve already been working on saving up for a place of my own for this summer. I don’t know how he’ll take it, but he hasn’t really tried to keep up with my life much lately so there’s not much he can say. I get the feeling that he might be confused about it, but at least secretly relieved. As much as I care about him and will miss him I can’t keep deluding myself that we’re really brothers. He’s an only child so when he was younger it was fun for him, but now and soon he’ll start to feel like I’m in his way. I want to leave before he resents me. Before I make it awkward for him…besides I bet he’s already thinking about his future with Lily. Moving in with him after Hogwarts would just be holding a place that’s not mine, a false sense of security before I’m asked to move out to make room for Lily and eventually the family he creates with her.”

Sirius flexed his fingers, really wishing that he had a firewhiskey in his hands for such deep, depressing admissions. He hated being such an emotional person, but he supposed there wasn’t much stability with inbreeding,

“I want to move in with someone who needs me for once. Someone I care about that I can help. That’s a pretty short list to be honest. I know someday you’ll do something wonderful, probably for all wizarding kind, and one day you’ll likely fall in love and won’t need me anymore, but I’m okay with being a footnote as long as I’m not on the wrong side of things. Hell considering my family I’ll consider myself a success if I just don’t end up on the evil side and I don’t marry a cousin, the second of which I can pretty much promise.”

Sirius didn’t notice the gaze Remus gave him while he tried to avoid eye contact for the serious conversation they were having. Sirius opened up rarely, but when he did it overflowed like a river and made him feel weak and pathetic. But his eyes drew back to his friend when Remus said he could teach alright. He smiled a little at that,

“You could teach brilliantly actually, and who better to deal with trouble making students than the brains of a troublemaking operation to rule them all,” Sirius teased at the end trying to lighten things up, “but only if you want to.”

Sirius snorted when Remus mentioned dinner,

“I suppose we could sneak into the kitchens if you want, but my dear Remus I do believe that you sometimes use food to coax a problem,” He teased as he glanced around checking for teachers, “let’s go then.”

Sirius reached behind him and took Remus’ hand, leading him towards the direction of the stairs that would head to the kitchens. As they reached the staircase he looked over his shoulder with a smile to say,

“You don’t have to answer me tonight about living with me you know. I have to get my own apartment either way so there’s no pressure, but just know that you’ll always have a place with me as long as I have one.”

With that to not pressure Remus he turned back around and led him onto the stairs, towards there destination.
 
Remus made a mental note to force James and Sirius in a room together, so they could talk this out. He was still internally a little excited about the prospects of living with Sirius, but honestly he also thought it was a matter of time before James and Sirius were back 'closer than blood'. They were like brothers, fighting and making up. Which was why Remus listened, but wasn't too worried about that pair. Besides... Remus actually liked Lily, she seemed like a kind girl. Which was why, even if he wanted to live with him, he took Sirius up on the offer of holding back an answer.

"...there will always be space for you at the Potters, and at the Lupin's for that matter," he told him, matter-of-factly, as if it was something Sirius was suppose to know as general fact.

He was a little flattered of how highly Sirius thought of him, both in regards to teaching and his future. "Thank you... You must have really missed me," he chuckled, in response to the nice words on his future. "...but please, if anyone is going to find love first, it will be Sirius Black. What about that girl who send you a note in potions class? The Hufflepuff." He pointed out with a teasing smile in his direction. The girl had tried to make it secretive, slipping her note toward their popular friend, but James had noticed first. Tapped Remus, who had tapped Peter. Soon all three of the marauders had pretty much stared her down curiously the entire time, making the scene quite obvious. Then when Sirius went to open it, they had all leaned in to read.

When he felt Sirius hand, he glanced down at it quickly. "I don't coax with food," he mumbled, although the foil on his chocolate moved noisily as they rushed across the hall. Then he followed after him to the staircase, ignoring that all his senses were hyperaware of his right hand. "We should take the armor passage down to the kitchen. Do you have the map?" he asked him. They could take the passage without the magical parchment, but it helped to know if someone were walking by on the other side. They had always liked to be the only ones knowing certain doors, moving statues and passable walls.

As they took the stairs, he suddenly heard a familiar voice ahead. When the two came to the next floor he recognised Wormtail's meek whisper, and had been about to call out, until he saw that he was speaking to... a Slytherin. His excited smile fell into confusion. Especially when he saw that it was not just any Slytherin girl. It was Bellatrix, Sirius infamous cousin and Black's pride these days. Naturally, as Sirius friend, he hated her, which was why it was confusing that Wormtail was standing in front of her. His hands twisting in front of him, as he did when he was nervous. Unfortunately their voices were too low to properly hear.
 
Sirius would like to think that there were spaces for him in this world like the ones that Remus talked about, but it was hard when his own mother didn’t want him. Not that he particularly wanted her, but it did mess with a young boys heart when he saw beautiful mother son relationships like the ones of his friends and knew that he didn’t have the same. His mother had always been cold, cruel, and judgy. He knew people like the Potters and the Lupins were kind and would offer him a home, but it would be out of pity and charity. Sirius for once wanted to be charitable himself. It was amazing how many people viewed him as the epitome of popularity at Hogwarts, but to himself he was more pitiful then the people he sometimes bullied, or used to anyway.

At the words that he must have missed Remus Sirius chuckled,

“You have no idea.” He breathed.

But Remus’ words made him actually laugh out loud. It was funny how many people saw him as a Casanova. Of course he played up that role he supposed, but it was all false physicality helping him deflect from his real problems. Women went out of their way to get his attention and he was sure that he was the envy of many a male student at Hogwarts, but the very same letter that had lead the Marauders to curiosity Sirius had thrown away. He’d made out with her for a bit and then they went their separate ways. Sirius knew that girls didn’t go to him for relationships or love, they went for the same reason he allowed it, a momentary distraction from the pain of the every day.

“Love you say? Ah Remus you’ve not been paying very close attention if you think that’s it. What girls want from me is not love, it’s a few moments of pleasure and a story to tell their friends, maybe one day their grandkids. Girls know I’m very good at physical pleasure, but none of them really want me. They want my reputation, my rebellion, my motorcycle, my mouth. They aren’t trying for love and I’m not offering it. They just want to see if the rumors are true, taste a bit of me, take a memento, and then find someone more stable. Women mess around with Sirius’s, but they fall in love with Remus’s.”

Sirius listened to Remus’ directions and nodded acceptance but let out a huff when Remus mentioned the map,

“Unfortunately no, I wanted it, but of course James had to go stalking Lily again so it was nowhere to be found. So basically with James. I do have the cloak if we need some extra cover however.”

Remus was the first one to hear Wormtail as Sirius was only paying attention to Remus at the time, but soon he found his gaze following Remus’ until he saw her, Bellatrix Lestrange the biggest psycho of his generation and a Black that would have actually made his own mother proud on the other side of a nervous Pettigrew.

“Bloody hell now we’ll never get food.” He growled.

As much as Sirius didn’t particularly like Peter Pettigrew, particularly compared to Remus or James, even he couldn’t let Peter be fed to the wolves. He had no idea how it happened that Bellatrix had even bothered herself with someone so low on the totem poll, but there was always the chance that it was to get to him. Bellatrix had always had an obsession with him, which he had always hoped to Merlin was not because she had a thing for him. Merlin knew that the Black Family genes did not swing far from the family tree, which was why they were all messed up in his own opinion. Sirius was not in the mood to really deal with his psychopath cousin, but he had to do what he had to do and this time it was such it up.

Of course he couldn’t allow any emotions when going into a pureblood conversation so he quickly turned himself around, used his wand to wash his face, dried it with his robes, pulled his body up to its full height, and began to march in their direction. The already too quiet to hear conversation died down to nothing as Sirius made a point of stepping in front of his cousin,

“Well, well, well what do we have here? ‘Trix your love interests seem to have changed dramatically. I hate to break it to you but my friend Peter has no familial ties to us, guess you’ll have to go look for Regulus or play with me instead,” He said pretending to tease, but eyes haughty and nose slightly upturned as he leaned in towards her, “my friends are not your play things you black hearted wench. Let the boy go.”

Sirius may have been disowned but he was born and bred Pureblood. He could fight on her turf and if he had to he would. No one messed with Sirius’ friends. He had made a big point of that when he came to school, especially when he was disowned and the Slytherins, vultures that they were came for him, but he was not an easy target and if his friends were messed with he had no problem reminding people of that.
 
"They would love you, if they got to know you," slipped from his mouth softly.

Then his green eyes went to focus on the encounter in front of them. Remus felt Sirius hand slip from his, as his friend seemed to mentally prepare himself for the interaction. It was as if Bellatrix had a sixth sense in that moment, because her head whipped over almost unnaturally fast, and locked eyes with first Remus and then Sirius. As soon as he stepped forward a smirk spread on her face, her arms crossed and she leaned a little over on one foot. Remus walked beside Sirius without hesitation, and his eyes going a stern now.

Peter made a small jump when he spotted his friends.

"Oh, you're quite right sweet cousin, I am a Black of heart, unlike you as a filthy bloodtraitor," she said in her usual thrilling tone, walking a step up to meet him. "...hanging out with your half-breed friend I see, couldn't even keep the pureblood one around after he got a little girlfriend? So, you had to settle," the end followed by her small giggle. Everyone aware of the new power-couple between the Gryffindor's head boy and girl.

Remus wasn't dumb enough to take her comments to heart though. Voice perfectly composed. "Keep away from us, Bellatrix," Remus told, but the girl just send him a look as if he was beneath her. His half-blood status clearly playing a role more than ever these darker days.

Peter hurried to scurry over toward the two marauders, with his hands up, as if to diffuse the situation. "Sirius!" Peter quickly said and hurried in front of him. "We were just talking about a thing about class. Just about class. She didn't bother me, so we should leave now." Remus hadn't realised his hand had touched the wand in his pocket, but now his fingers relaxed a little, even if it didn't move entirely.

"Yeah, let's go," Remus said, and touched Sirius arm lightly.

Bellatrix leaned over on the other leg and eyed her cousin, as if to see if he was actually going to listen, or had more to say. Her eyes clearly hoping that there was something else coming, because her own wand was resting in her crossed hands. She would love a reason to throw a spell toward him that would really show what she thought of him leaving the family.
 
Sirius heard the comment about loving him if they knew him. It was a sweet statement, but unfortunately Sirius couldn’t buy it. And in a way it was okay, because Sirius didn’t take them very seriously himself. He used them to hide from his true demons and his true self. Actually to a degree he preferred that they wanted to use him, otherwise he’d be a horrible person for using them first.

Pureblood interactions were generally rather much of the same. How many times had Sirius and Bellatrix danced this same dance? He couldn’t count. Even before he entered Gryffindor and became Black family persona non-grata he’d never gotten along with her. The half-breed friend comment did cause him to wrinkle his nose in distaste and as if she could sense his current issue with James and wanted to dig Remus in the process she spewed her bile out of her wicked mouth. But of course Sirius wouldn’t and couldn’t allow Bellatrix to call Remus settling,

“Bellatrix your I know it’s hard for you to process things having had one too many blows to the head from your deranged father while growing up so I’ll try to make it easy on you. This is Remus, he is not second best to anyone, and I know it’s difficult for you to make any friends so this may come as quite a shock, but you can have more than one and no one has to be lesser than another.”

Despite what Bellatrix felt about Sirius he could tell the difference between dislike and disrespect. Bellatrix looked at Remus like he was disgusting, but she couldn’t help but view Sirius as an equal, and all because of blood. She could hate him, but she still couldn’t help but come at him and respond when she got a chance. But what he was confused about was why she was not specifically mentioning Peter in all this. Still, maybe it was because Peter was beneath her. He did come across as a lackey of sorts.

Sirius watched as Peter exclaimed that they were just talking about a class thing. Sirius almost looked at Peter as if he had three heads, but then just felt sorry for the boy. He supposed he shouldn’t get in the way of Peter’s class work. After all Pettigrew was a less than average student and could not afford to do worse than he currently was. He tried to keep up with the other Marauders but Remus actually loved school and thus studied for fun, James was already fairly good at it without trying and now that he was definitely showed brilliance, and Sirius did well in most classes without even studying, after all had he not grown up in a family that only knew the magical world.

To be quite honest the Black part of himself wanted to push the envelope, wanted to duel his cousin and make her pay for her words, her deeds, and beliefs. But Peter and Remus would very likely be caught up in the fight. Bellatrix was a cruel witch who would be quite satisfied to cause his friends pain and convince him that it was his own doing. So he did the harder of the two options, the braver of them, and for now at least, he walked away, allowing his friends to lead him. But his fingers itched to grab his wand and send a spell her way.

“Whatever class you have with her tell the teacher that after this project you don’t want her as a partner again Peter,” he said to the smallest marauder as Bellatrix headed the other way, “I have a lot of cruel and crazy relatives, but she is the craziest and the cruelest.”

Peter fidgeted for a few moments before stopping abruptly in front of him, which almost caused Sirius to ram into him,

“Oi, what the bloody-” Sirius began as he worked at stopping himself.

“I just remembered I still have an essay to write.” Peter said wide eyed at him.

“An essay? I don’t remember an essay-“ Sirius began but Peter was already off, scurrying like the creature he could turn into.

Sirius let out a sigh,

“Well that was odd, but that works for me I’d rather have some personal Moony and Me time anyway.” Sirius said with a smile at Remus.

Then he paused as he was reminded of what his cousin said,

“I hope that you didn’t take what Bellatrix said to heart Remus, she wouldn’t know real friendship if it came and bit her on the arse.”

Truthfully Remus would never be second best to Sirius, indeed he would always have a special place for him in his heart and now was no different.
 
Bellatrix just smirked at the insult, but a look of genuine disappointment did flash over her cold gaze when Sirius didn't seem interested in taking it further. She would have enjoyed a reason to blast the Gryffindors with her spells. She pursed her lips, rolled her eyes, but in the end just headed in the opposite direction. "Always nice talking to you, cousin," she sing-song'ed with a giggle as she left. Remus always got the creeps from that girl, no matter which tone of voice she used, it always seemed to come off.... evil.

Remus had been glancing after her, just in case she decided to throw a nasty spell over her shoulder that he needed to block. So when Peter abruptly stopped in front of them, he not-so-elegantly tripped into Sirius' back. He swiftly caught onto his arms though, so none of them tumbled over, or fell into the shorter Marauder. "Essay?" Remus glanced over at Peter confused, because he knew all the marauders classes, but Sirius beat him in saying that 'there was no essay'... unless Peter was doing some kind of make-up paper. Remus was at least aware of why Sirius and James might be busy, but he had so many questions to Wormtail about his whereabouts. He wanted to ask him more, but the guy always seemed to have somewhere to be.

"See you later," Remus told him softly, before the boy ran off.

Then he walked up on Sirius side, shaking his head when he asked if he had taken his charming cousin's comment to heart. "No. I can't believe you're family," he stated. "...Sometimes it amazes me how different you are from people like Bellatrix. And that is the deepest of compliments, by the way." He glanced over his shoulder, as if she would pop up again like Bloody Mary upon hearing her name.

"...speaking of different," Remus mumbled and looked over at Sirius. "...Wormtail is acting very different. Normally he is following us around daily, but lately I sometimes don't see him for days. I thought maybe it was just with me, but I don't think he hangs around you or James either, right?" Since they were sleeping in the same dormitory, usually ate dinner together and had various classes that was actually very strange.

The two came to a long corridor with a large armor, standing lonesome, against the wall. Remus walked over toward it, and lifted his wand up to tap on its head and then on its breastplate. With an abrupt metallic rattle, the armor saluted them, then promptly stepped aside. Just for the fun of it Remus saluted it back, and then walked right into the newly exposed wall. Without any difficulty stepping through the solid-looking rock, and came out on the other side. It was dark, but Remus knew exactly how it looked. They had stepped out on a small platform, with a long stair that he knew went directly down to the kitchen, this stair was normally only used by house-elves.

"Lumos," he whispered and lit up his wand, to illuminate their path.
 
Sirius snorted at Bellatrix’s comment, but was pleased to note that she at least didn’t start something herself. Remus was smart to keep looking until she was gone. There was no telling with a deranged woman like Bellatrix.

“I swear that woman will be the death of me one day.” Sirius said shaking his head.

A sigh of relief escaped him when Remus promised not to believe his family. That was a smart call give or take a person here or there. He smiled a little upon being complimented about being nothing like his family, but he feared that wasn’t exactly accurate. He did try though,

“Unfortunately I have my moments, I was raised by similar people after all. But if I ever become too much like that one just put me down. I don’t think my heart could bear it.”

The conversation soon moved to Wormtail which made Sirius wrinkle his nose,

“Yeah, considering how much of an obsession with us when we were younger I was expecting him to latch onto me when James started to go M.I.A. If James hasn’t made much time for me there’s no way he’s hanging with Peter. Honestly I’m probably the only Marauder that hasn’t been M.I.A though as my stalking the library may prove. With James chasing Lily’s skirt I was wondering if Peter got himself a girl as well. I can definitely understand if he wants to avoid us then, not only to see her, but also to not let her compare him with us. If I were him I wouldn’t want that comparison, you know?”

Sirius walked alongside Remus as the chatted. He paused while Remus played with the armored passage way and smiled fondly at the other boy before adding,

“It would be nice to get everyone together soon at least for a little while, but I don’t know if I have the heart to be turned down by James so we’ll see. One on one time works for me for now anyway.”

Sirius followed Remus onto the path and didn’t bother with his own wand since Remus found his. Soon they were too the last portrait they needed to be and Sirius ticked the pair leading them in where excited House elves greeted and seated them. Sirius smiled at Remus,

“So how hungry are you exactly?”
 
Remus imagined the scenario of Wormtail having a girl, and tilted his head as he thought about it. Remus had never seen him with girls ever, now that he thought about it. Yet Sirius last words, made Remus flash him a slightly scolding look, since his friend was saying that Peter would be inferior to the rest of them. He was still their friend, even if Remus was aware that the rat animagus had always preferred Sirius and James - even more after they found out that Remus was a werewolf. Peter never said it out loud, but Remus could tell he feared him a little more. He had always just promptly ignored it.

"Well, if he really has a girl, we haven't seen her on the map, unless he is dating one of those Slytherin's. In that case, he could be hiding her from us," he pointed out. Then he added a bit playfully. "...maybe he was dating your cousin earlier, Padfoot." Naturally that was all a joke though, because he doubted no one would be initiating that.

His gaze softened when he said he was fine spending time with Remus only. "Me too," he agreed and lit up their path down to the kitchen. Once they opened the last portrait he turned off the light in his wand, and was greeted by the wrinkly house-elves on the other side. His lips lifting by the hospitality.

The elves didn't hesitate to bring them out various dishes of food, and Remus had just taken a bite when he noticed something over in one of the closets. He nudged Sirius side, and directed his gaze over to a container with fire-whiskey. Definitely not for students, and the elfs would probably never let them try to take it. He send him a questioning look, wether they should try for it or not. Fine with any doing it or not. There was no tests tomorrow.
 
Sirius saw Remus’ scolding look, but he knew from past experience that his friend would let it go. Sirius had never understood when Peter had followed him around as he had certainly not been the one to invite Wormtail into the group. Sirius felt like he didn’t quite fit with them. He wasn’t good looking or brilliant in anything particular, nor was he a big trouble maker. He was just so average that it was strange compared with the other marauders. Remus had always been the nicest to Peter and James had enjoyed the praise. But Sirius had just accepted it because of the other two. Still sometimes before the individuals began to separate Sirius would be confused how Peter actually ended up with the others.

The thought of anyone dating Bellatrix made him gag, but he was still quite sure that with Bellatrix’s high, but horrifying standards Peter wouldn’t stand a chance,

“Thankfully for his sake Bellatrix is quite particular about the type of person she’d give it up for. Last time I checked, Peter was not even loosely related to the Black Family or any of the upper echelon Pureblood families, the lucky sod. Then again I’m not listen on the Black Family tree anymore myself despite blood, so you never know about some of the lineage. Either way Peter is very lucky that Bellatrix wouldn’t set her sights on him, one would have to be deranged to date ‘Trix.’ As for Peter dating a Slytherin in general that is definitely a reason to hide her, but that would be a terrible idea for Peter. He’s more of a follower than a leader and that can be quite a dark path so I sincerely hope not.”

Sirius thought about the looking at the map and seeing anything suspicious, but if he thought about it honestly he didn’t really look for Peter when he had it,

“Now that I think about it I don’t really look for where Peter is much, so I probably wouldn’t notice even if he was with someone. Right now the only one James looks for is Evans. So only you’d be able to tell us if you’ve been looking. Besides that we all share one map including Peter, so it’s easy to miss something like that. We’d have to pay attention more consistently if we really wanted to know.”

Sirius smiled at Remus’ statement of enjoying his time alone, before setting down and beginning to eat with his friend. As he was wolfing down a treacle tart and a steak and Kidney pie at the same time, he was nudged by Remus. Sirius looked up and followed Remus’ gaze to the firewhiskey, swallowing and the smirking hard. It was always funny to him when Remus wanted to do something naughty, since he was really the moral compass of the group most of the time. Of course he was still a marauder, so he had his mischievous side as well. Sirius loved that dichotomy.

Reaching into his robe, Sirius gently took out his wand before giving Remus a signal to distract any house elves that might be looking in case they weren’t okay with underage drinking. When the coast seemed clear he pointed his wand in the direction of the magical alcoholic beverage before whispering,

‘Accio firewhiskey.’

Once it was within reach Sirius smoothly slipped it into his robe pocket, tucking his wand next to it,

“Dorm?” Sirius questioned Remus, as they couldn’t drink the bottle in so obvious a place.

Since it was well hidden now Sirius turned to one of the house elves and got their attention,

“Can you please pack this up for us, we’d like to bring it back to our dorms thanks?”

Sirius watched as the house elves got to it, all seemingly busy all the time, it was no wonder that things could slip pass them when they seemed so harried all the time. He smiled at Remus feeling rather pleased with himself,

“And please throw in some portable butterbeers if you can.” He added for effect.

Once the food seemed prepared he said thank you to the elves and then looked at Remus,

“Ready to go?”
 
Remus threw the last bite of a scone in his mouth, before he dusted his hands off and reached for his wand. He exchanged a glance with his friend, but already knew his role. Maybe it was because he had been holed up in the library for weeks, but he had really needed a day like this. His eyes trailing over the elves to make sure that none of them could be thinking about looking in Sirius direction. One of them had headed over to get something on that shelf, and Remus swiftly made a few apples roll off the counter. The elf immediately let out a gasp, and started collecting them. The time it took to get them all, was plenty for the bottle to fly through the air and magically out of sight.

He turned his head and mirrored Sirius' smile. "Sure. Dorm."

Not long after, the elves had been kind enough to wrap up their food and Remus took it with a grateful nod of his head. "Thank you so much. It was delicious," he told them genuinely.

"Black and Lupin are always welcome in our kitchen," the elf told him in a pitched voice, as it folded its hands.

Remus send them another smile, before he followed with Sirius back out the path they had arrived. Once the painting closed, he lit up his wand again in a Lumos. "That might have been a bit close," he admitted under his breath, and held the bag of food toward him, in case he wanted to drop the Fire-Whiskey in there. "Is it a good brand?" he asked him with a smile and leaned over his shoulder to light up the label for him. His eyes lifted to Sirius face, vaguely lit up from his light. He hit his foot against the stair, and quickly turned the light toward the staircase instead. Realising that he should probably be paying attention to where the walked in the dark.

He cleared his throat. "James is going to be so jealous that we are drinking without him," he pointed out, and concentrated more to ascend the steps that led up to the corridor.
 
Sirius grinned at Remus admonishing him about being a little too close, but Sirius had always been the biggest risk taker of the group and tonight was no different. If Remus was the brains, Sirius was the braun, whether physically or magically,

“Without risks there are no adventures…besides I’ve always lived dangerously.” Sirius said cheekily giving Remmy a wink before following the light from Remus’ wand.

He chuckled a little when Remus mentioned brands. Sirius was not one to pay attention to such things, for him anything risky to get tasted good enough for him, but in case Moony did have his own preference about it he slid the bottle out of his pocket and rotated it so that Remus could illuminate the label,

“Firewhiskey is all the same to me, its sweeter because its forbidden, as many things are for that matter, how about you? Is this brand to your liking?”

Sirius snorted a little at Remus hitting his foot into a staircase while focusing on the firewhiskey,

“Really Remus you’d think this is your first night drinking.” He teased as they hopped on to the second rung of the moving staircase.

At the mention of James being jealous Sirius smirked, but it didn’t reach his eyes,

“Well if he is he knows where to find us, as I’m pretty sure that he is the one with the map right now.”

Soon they were standing in front of the portrait of the fat lady and then they made their way up to the room, Sirius dramatically throwing the door open and singing,

“There’s whiskey in the jar,” before noticing that Peter was oddly not there despite having run off, but he preferred at this point that it just be himself and Remus.

He grabbed two pillows and sat himself down on the floor in the middle of the dorm, the other pillow thrown across him waiting for Remus to sit on it as he popped the top off of the firewhiskey with the side of his bed and began to lay out the food.

“Picnic ala Moonfoot style,” He announced offering Remus the first taste, “friends before firewhiskey,” He said before, “Cheers.”
 
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