Badly Describe a Game Here

Several avians are rather irate as a result of an army of green porcine absconding with their eggs. Clearly the only logical course of action is to fire themselves out of slingshots.
-Angry Birds
 
Nickelodeon: Toons VS Company Logo

Alternatively... "The Plunger of Doom" was the best part in the whole game.
Spongebob FT. Nicktoons Globs of Doom
 
yeah there's plot but first i gotta build my real estate empire. have you done the dominatrix side quest yet?

Yakuza 0
 
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The world wants you dead. Solve this murder case before it wins. Why? Who? Whats happening?

Disco Elysium.
 
Giant flying Cosmic meatballs that use glowy rocks to make more cosmic meat balls.

Deadspace 3 (and technically the series)
 
So the game starts with you getting arrested, right? And you wake up with this insurgent group led by this guy whom I could listen to read the phone book. But turns out he's a racist prick so frick that. Anyways, you and the insurgents are going to get executed until some evil king guy everyone thought was dead shows up and sets everything on fire. And I guess mysterious resurrections and arson are grounds for pardon these days, because it's basically never brought up again.

Anyways, then you wander around in the woods for a while and maybe shoot some people if you feel like it. Then you find a town and help someone who got robbed, then you find another town and help someone else who got robbed, and help some nerd finish his rock collection. This results in more arson, but that's okay because being around arson apparently makes you popular.

*Major Story Spoilers from Here on Out*
So next you get invited to this exclusive club where some crusty old guys tell you that your so bad at making conversation that it literally kills people. You hone this skill through murder. They want you to join their club, but first you have to find this old knick-knack one of their old friends lost. None of them had to do that, but that's what double standards are for. While you're trying to join that club, a lady decides to approach you about her exclusive club, which can't decide if it would rather fight the evil king or the Nazis. (Oh yeah, there's Nazis BTW.) Either way, she needs an army, and you start building this army by recruiting old people in the sewer.

Once this exclusive club is sufficiently manned with the elderly, you can finally go back and join the other exclusive club. First they tell you that saving the world is a bad thing, actually, but eventually they tell you the evil king can be stopped through the power of books, because apparently this game was written by English teachers. You steal the book from a bunch of disabled people and their pets (and kill them for good measure because you're the hero dammit). Once you steal the book, some dead people teach you how to have conversational skills so terrible that your small talk can reverse immortality.

The game also turns into a highschool drama here when the two exclusive clubs make you choose whose lunch table you want to sit at. With murder.

Now you can almost kill the king, but you need help from one of his arsonist friends. So you catch the arsonist in a trap. Made of wood. Nobody, including the arsonist, point out this design flaw. The arsonist tells you that the evil king went through a portal to heaven and is now eating the souls of the dead because going vegan just didn't work out.

Dying to get to the afterlife is for plebs, so you go through a fancy portal instead. All the ghosts there are pissed because the evil king is ruining the weather (and also maybe eating people's souls or something), so you use your terrible conversation skills to make him explode, the end.

Oh, there's also dragons, I don't know if that's important.
TES5: Skyrim
 
A prestigious college tries to make itself look better by randomly selecting a poor kid to join its ranks. This leads to several murders.
-Danganropa.
 
Force waifus (and I guess some other guys) to be your friends and then send them into battle. Also most of them are dressed like bunnies because apparently the artists have a thing for that.
-Fire Emblem Heroes
 
You fall in love with young, hot Colonel Sanders. No, really.
Then your best friend falls in love with a pressure cooker. No, really.

- I Love You, Colonel Sanders
 
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