Among the Stars - Main thread

InsanEleven

King Allyn the Autistic
INTRO


"This is echo-delta 7 to Betelgeuse 8A-IX, in case any of you are actually listening and these comms work, we're leaving to obtain Target One. Mainly because it turns out the previous Target One was actually a bit of an asshole. Am I right Cap?" The INANES nonchalantly had both of his feet up on the dashboard of the spaceship, though it was more or less a bathtub with wings at this point. While speaking he grinned slightly to the woman beside him, knowing full well he was pissing someone off, if not perhaps himself. "In any case, this poor little broken robot will get you one that's a bit prettier to look at. Because personality in machines is overrated amirite? Now I believe it is time for the captain to do the exits, because I might accidentally call you fuckers something mean that'll hurt your poor princess feelings." Still grinning like the devil Saami held out the radio to Adira, but halfway through a very annoyed "Who's the princess here Snow White?" crackled through. Which only had the effect of making him laugh impishly.


At least he had to admit he preferred this type of interaction, which just about equalled to him simply not caring anymore what he said to whom. In fact he seemed to care a little bit too less about how he did anything as long as it got done, the proof of that being he was increasing the acceleration by pressing the hand-operated throttle forward with his foot. But at least for now he was still too vain to be a slob. Meaning that despite wearing the standard mechanic pants, a T-shirt and his hair being makeshift cut to half length with kitchen scissors, he was still clean. Somehow even a bomb didn't manage to blast that out of him; in fact, metal feet were surprisingly hygienic.


When he had hit the right speed, he removed his feet from the dashboard and sat up right again. Taking out a pack of cigarettes while at the same time straightening his hair somewhat with his other hand, he got out of his chair, watching Adira handle the comms. "Don't forget to tell them we'll be meeting up with the rest of the fleet after the warp, at about the height of Galila. Inbefore we have to try make this snail of a ship catch up. I'll be checking in on the rest of the crew and attempting very slow suicide." Not making any more words dirty to that he tapped a cigarette out of the packet and pulled a lighter from his pocket. Not lighting it yet, but twiddling it between his fingers as he walked to the back room of the ship.
 
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Adira chuckled and rolled her eyes a bit as she took the radio from the second-in-command. Saami had become a borderline asshole in the time since the bombing, but he was still getting used to his freedom, and by her figuring, if anyone had a right to be cynical and rude, it was him. She mayn't have had that right but she took it anyway. That seemed like the only way to get things in life anyway, at least recently. To take. And she was good at taking. "Excuse the pilot, we needed your attention. And he was telling the truth about the original Target One. Now that we've got your attention, though, I ought to get to the point. We'll be rejoining the fleet later. It's going to take about two hours to reach the warp port to get to Target One, but we'll catch up somehow. Rik out."


She turned off the comms before a reply could come through. If they had anything good to say, well that was good. If they didn't, she didn't care. This allegiance to this rebellion hadn't exactly been her idea in the first place. Unlike some of the others, she didn't really want to have a cause anymore, at least nothing legitimate. She'd been all for just buying or stealing a ship and heading off with the crew and working on a few bounties or the like. But in the end, the group decision had been this.


Now that they were flying steady for a bit, Adira stood and stretched. A twinge in her leg reminded her all too well of the bombing a few months back, in which a number of important muscles and tendons in her right leg had been damaged by shrapnel. Doc had had to replace the damaged parts with cables or some such, and her muscles were still adjusting. At one time, Adira had prided herself on being fully human, without any replacements, but those days had passed. The bombing had made a lot of things pass.
 
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3488/07/14 20:14:23


"And this is why we commend these brave souls here today, for their actions have shaped not only our own, but the futures of generations to follow as well." The applause rang through the large, open auditorium. The people lined up on the stage awaiting it gracefully but most not able to hold back a grin. After all the hardships they had gone through, all the pain and hurt to achieve this, it wasn't surprising though to see everyone happy to finally be lauded and honoured. They deserved it, each and every one of them. On the other end, hiding behind the blaring light of the spotlights were undoubtedly hundreds of young faces. Students who were about as eager to be in that hall, perhaps hoping themselves they would one day be on the other end. Or even moreso: to one day be where they had gone. When the applause finally simmered down again, the announcer called Captain Adira Rik forward towards the microphone. "Before we will continue with handing out the personal awards, first a few words from Captain Rik."


Those words never got said, as the moment she had taken a step forward something small and round reflected in the light of those spots. Most wouldn't even have seen it, but Saami's eyes shot into action immediately at the slightest shimmer. Burning bright blue, then violet as within a split second all his systems were enhanced. Bomb. There wasn't time to even think of anything else, and he didn't even know why he was running forwards toward it. Training most likely, his personality perhaps. Within two steps he had reached Adira, pushing her back hard so she'd fall and slide back. But the crew wasn't the only thing in that hall, and he knew all those faces in the dark had family waiting. Eager to see them home. Death was in their own line of work, not in that of a students. And a certain calm ran over him when he made his decision, even though he knew he would soon have twice as many deaths on his name. Kicking the small silver orb down in mid air, he watched it roll below the stage into the crawlspaces. In his head he saw the statistics run down, his possible actions reducing to zero when he hit the floor. Realising he was at least facing feet first towards the stage he pulled them up and placed his arms over his head, and he never remembered finishing that action. Silence. Yet it was so loud. Filling his head with mist.


Where am I? Should it be quiet? With the greatest effort he turned his head.


Only to see chaos. Running. People screaming in silence.


A white layer of something. Snow... I like snow...


no... dust.


And the darkest red liquid mixing through it.


It was still quiet. When he stretched out his fingers he wasn't trying to ask for help. He simply wanted someone to break that silence. To hear someone's voice. Instead he got more than he asked for. Blood curdling screams swelling and swelling. From everywhere, everyone, from inside. Barraged by intense pain he could feel his unwilling screams leaving him. Spitting out large amounts of blood. Blood coming from places it shouldn't. At least he felt, at least he heard, which meant he was alive.


I don't want to be.


It hurts. It all hurts. Why not my legs?


Where are my legs?


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3488/12/08 14:36:14


With shivering hands he lit his cigarette, having to try a few times before he actually got it. His breath had become somewhat short, but he tried to pretend he didn't notice it by taking a long draw from the cigarette. Like he could lie to himself it was a nicotine withdrawal, when his systems indicated that wasn't the case. He'd never had one anyway; his body countered it unless it got really bad. Still he didn't want to accept. It was easier to fix an addiction to cigarettes than a mind like his. Breathing out again he forced himself to continue to take deep breaths immediately afterwards. Then laid down on his bed and stared at the dark ceiling for a while. Memories were running wild in his head again, and the cigarette never proved to be as good of a distraction as he thought.


A chuckle escaped him the same moment tears ran down his cheek. Tears he quickly wiped away. I killed them I don't deserve to cry. Weak. Weak. Laughing slightly at his own pathetic attempt to crawl away in the dark. Like his own cowardice was something he could run from. I wanted to die. Why am I still here? Because he couldn't pull through with it when it came to it. He could've caught that bomb, and he doubted splatters of his blood would have been as damaging as the splinters were. Even if he rationally knew he had done the right thing for the moment, he didn't believe it himself. It hadn't felt right from the moment he woke. Now he just had to live. There was no other curse he could think of that would be worse. To watch what he had done, and was still doing. I hate it. All of them, but mostly himself. The person he was the biggest prick to was himself. And he felt completely justified doing it.


By the time his cigarette was gone, his mind had cleared to somewhat lighter places again. Finding a strange solace in that he was at least punished right, whatever belief helped him live, right? Wasn't that how it worked?


"Because wooptydoo life is always so fucking great." The sarcasm dripped off his words when he flicked the butt of the cigarette away, managing to bounce it into the trashcan without looking. "Let's see how all the other idiots stuck here are holding up... might still get a laugh out of the sight of it." With what appeared to be the biggest effort, but was actually just the permanent despondency he had gotten used to, he stood up and went into the hallow light of the hallway again.


END INTRO
 
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<span style="font-family:'Titillium Web';">3488/12/08 14:48:20 </span>


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<span style="font-family:'Titillium Web';">Jericho was very fortunate to have already gotten used to constant whirring that surrounds him. The source, at this point, is very convoluted, for it could be the ship and its endless hum, his arms which servos groan when strained, or the latest addition to his body—his cybernetic eye. Either way, the sound has already become an empty echo in the space of his head, and added a rather pleasing melody to his day-to-day tasks. The mellow monotone often mirrored the task at hand, and Jericho could appreciate the beauty in its harmony. Not all was well though. A piercing shriek replaced the hum, followed by waves of ringing and screams. He closed his eyes, and placed his metal fingers to his temple. In the different, spotty heat patterns, he could almost make out the explosion again. In the phantom feeling of his robotic eye, he could almost feel the mix of blood and debris that tore the original to shreds. A bad memory, he called it. Nothing more than a hiccup in the fifty-two years he has lived. A tragedy, no doubt, but nothing worse than something he has faced before. That was until he felt the ghastly grip of a freshly warm corpse. In the memory, he recalls opening his eyes to a young cadet, no older than eighteen, clinging, in pieces, to the dress shirt Jericho was known to don. The clothes of both of them were tattered at this point, but while Jericho could see the different shades of his injured body, only a mop of red could be found just below the corpse's rib cage. Effectively blown in half. The mouth of the individual was open enough to see the shiny teeth, newly whitened for the occasion, but never enough to let out all the words the cadet was dying to tell. A cry for their mother. A confession to their loved one. An apology to those done wrong, or an acceptance of those that have wronged them in the past—all locked away now behind the opaque face of an apparition. A soul leaving the body, and an aura, like Saami's, that he saw fading away before his very eyes. He clung to them. In that moment, for comfort, and even now, in his remembrance, to honor the life he still lived and the life that was so forcibly taken from the youthful. It was unfair, but he figured life takes the best of them. Nobody knows when they are going to be gone, and it is imperative to make the most of any situation like this cadet did. There is something to be proud of at least, something much less painful. The universe giveth, and the universe taketh—ashes to ashes, dust to dust. Jericho's eyes open. The ringing stops. The humming returns, and his chest still feels heavy. It always does. He silently continues his work on an air regulation duct, even as footsteps resonate against the tile, and a familiar face joins him in the hallway.</span>


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When Saami saw Jericho he simply lifted his head in a nod of acknowledgement of him being alive. Well, about 2/3rds of him at most, but good enough. However, seeing the broken air duct made Saami switch from his original plan of not talking, giving a simple "what's up with the duct?" after his nod. Though his tone was annoyed and he didn't appear in the mood for anything more than a to the point answer, it could be seen as an improvement of his usual choose of wording: there no 'fuck' 'damn', 'stupid' or any denomination of those three included. A subtle but sure sign there was still some respect to be found for the man; only the man, as all the irritation in his voice was aimed at the ship. The only reason he hadn't kicked the metal walls in frustration was because he was afraid he'd hear something vital tumble down through it. Even though he wasn't a dedicated mechanic, he carried some tools with him in the pockets of his cargo pants just to be able to tighten some nuts and bolts on the go, as they somehow always managed to untie themselves again by the next time he passed. For now though it held, and even if the state of the ship was shitty all around, it's original design had been good and sturdy. Yet however good and sturdy a design, it wouldn't quite matter if they all died of suffocation. Then it'd just be a sturdy, rust covered coffin.
 
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<span style="font-family:'Titillium Web';">Hearing the familiar voice, Jericho twisted his hips and faced the INANES that approached him in the hallway. The white tile of the corridor was frankly blinding, but carefully diverted eyes settled on the nearly just as pale skin of the boy, and he took in the company. It was obvious that Saami was clearly changed, and over the course of the year, Jericho has taken mental notes on all the little quirks and mannerisms of the new person and while Saami may hold a degree of respect toward Jericho, and Jericho held respect for him, Jericho ultimately had to adjust to the new personality. He was almost an entirely new person, but a person that deserved his respect nonetheless. There was a fundamental rudeness, but the rudeness, Jericho believed, was going to be short-lived. Saami oddly reminded Jericho of himself before his entire adventure aboard the Lullaby. The cynical nihilist that despised everything that moved, could move, or ever thought of moving, but Jericho hoped he moved past such small hold-ups. And he hoped the best from Saami. </span><span style="font-family:'Titillium Web';"><span style="color:#006666;">"What's up with the duct?"</span></span><span style="font-family:'Titillium Web';"> The voice joined his symphony of hums in his head, and the words jumbled around for a solid couple of seconds before he registered it into his brain. A response followed suit. </span><span style="font-family:'Titillium Web';"><strong>"A simple clog, Saami, nothing too crazy. I must ask you to stop your smoking habit on this ship until we upgrade the ventilation though. The loose ash is messing with the central air filter."</strong></span><span style="font-family:'Titillium Web';"></span>


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Saami just rolled his eyes and grumbled internally, biting his lip to hold back a very irritated scoff. <span style="color:#006666;">"You sure it isn't, you know... Adira's hair or something?"</span> Already knowing the answer himself, he nearly immediately followed with a shrug.<span style="color:#006666;"> "Fine, whatever... not like I needed it anyway."</span> <em>One or two a day wouldn't hurt though, right? </em>If anything just to ease out of it. The idea of withdrawals of any kind in a spaceship didn't seem that optimal either. Before he'd snort the damn ash out of the vents. <span style="color:#006666;">"Seriously though, I'll tell Cap we're getting that fixed ASAP when we're back. My face's too pretty to choke in this sardine tin."</span> That last part wasn't exactly necessary, but he felt like it needed to be said anyway. The smug raise of the corner of his mouth revealed that he was also pretty happy with himself for saying it. <span style="color:#006666;">"Just... keep making sure we don't die, or something. I dunno."</span> As he said it he was already moving away one backwards step at a time, his hands in his pocket. Until he just decided he didn't actually care about goodbyes or dying, shrugged weakly and turned around so he could walk away normally.


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Adira wandered about a bit until she found a window to look out of. Funny, sometimes space looked the same wherever you were. Aboard the <em>Lullaby</em> there had been plenty of windows, but on this thing there were few.... She still questioned if she shouldn't have remained Captain of the Lullaby. But there were so many memories there, it would hurt too badly. And as much as she had loved leading exploration searches, there was just too much anger in her heart now. She wanted this terrorism, this <em>Illuminated Revolution,</em> this Black Market, this bloody mess, finished, she wanted it all ended, she wanted closure of her own making, and the military couldn't give it to her. How many promises to herself had she broken by going back to this illegal world? They would become vigilantes, vagrants, rebels, any number of words could describe them, but none of the words truly explained what she was rejoining or what she was bringing her crew into. There was no heroism in murder. There was no heroism in torture. There was no heroism in theft or kidnapping or bribes.... But when had she ever been a hero? No doubt about it, Captain Rik had gone back to her roots, and she was almost ashamed. Almost. Those years leading exploration trips, two crews, two families, it had been so nice, it had been such an escape. Even if she had returned to the underworld during shore leave, she'd become a Captain with positive influence. One of the good guys. One of the ones who stood in the light and said, "I added to the world." Now her positive influence was whatever good she could do by her crew, and whatever murderers she could kill. Mercy was the mark of a great man, but she had never claimed to be great. Her reasoning for joining the Free For All, or at least, attempting to, was to stay with her crew. She would have just left and gone to be a vigilante on her own, but her crewmates...? No. She wouldn't leave them. As much as she hated the idea of being under someone else's orders, it was clear to her that she would have to keep her mouth shut and go with it. As their application to the FFA, Adira had led the remainder of her crew in stealing this crappy ship, and was now leading them in a mission to an old military base, where they would steal/kidnap a number of new and untrained INANES. Adira held no issues with the military (most of the military), they did their job, she did hers, sometimes her job required messing with theirs. No big issue. While some were with the FFA for robo-rights or INANES rights, Adira was a bit more... old-fashioned. Saami was her friend, so of course she would help INANES, but she could never say it was her priority. After all, Saami had been special... not all INANES could feel, right? He was basically the only one? They would find out soon anyway. But her main priority was the advantages in destroying the Black Market, especially the slave and drug trades. Her big issue with IR was that they were now attacking people based on species or just for having a different opinion, besides just randomly murdering innocents in cowardly attacks. And they had killed half of her crew, which meant they had painted a giant target on the backs of anyone with any association to them. Adira sighed a bit and opened her eyes. Same shitty ship they had stolen... no waking up to being back on the <em>Lullaby</em> with her crew. This was life again, and if it meant that she had to ally with an organization instead of going rogue... then so be it. She could manage it, as long as the orders remained reasonable, and as long as her crew stayed safe. Maybe someday she could even find a way to clear their records and get them back to the free, good world they had left... she knew she could never go back. There was no more hope of clearing her record or becoming the best person she could be. The choice had been made: to give in to old habits and just make her own rules. And as much as that hurt... the finality of it kind of made her feel better.


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Saami passed the captain a brief moment in making his rounds, and remarked without ever taking the time to stop: <span style="color:#006666;">"Yo cap, looking for space whales? Cause if the air filters get any fucking worse we might see 'em soon." </span>Half and half he expected some answer, but he just kept walking; he hadn't said it to get an answer, just so she would know. Thing brought to attention, mission complete, on to the next boring task. Which was one he admittedly had even less patience for. It wasn't easy to make knocking on a door sound annoying, but Saami sure as hell pulled it off when he racked his knuckles over the metal surface. <span style="color:#006666;">"Hey Princess Parsnip, you alive in there? Yes or no will do."</span> For some reason none really understood he had started calling Kira 'princess something' every time he needed to interact with her. Only it was never the same noun attached to it, and by now he'd gone through all the very insulting words he could think of. So instead he'd just started listing off random items. <span style="color:#006666;">"If you're dead we'll have to send you out through the airlock though. And it's not that I wouldn't like doing that, but I have better things to do with my time."</span> Like watching movies, or playing games, hell, even sleeping counted at that point. It was also not exactly clear from his voice how much he meant of it, and whether the disdain was either really well acted, or actually there. One could think it was a joke, but then again he wasn't exactly laughing.


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Kira groaned at the clang of Saami's knocking, setting down a sheaf of papers on the tiny table. Even with technology it was her favored way to get down her thoughts, a journal of sorts. She rubbed her eyes, she'd pulled an all nighter again, even after several months after leaving home she still didn't feel comfortable when trying to sleep and had taken to writing instead. When she opened the door, she probably looked like death warmed over. Her disheveled knee length hair pulled back in one long braid, bangs sticking up in every which way, a result of shoving her fingers over her forehead, and the dark circles around her eyes lent to the effect. She was greeted first by the sight of Saami's chest and looked up at him, feeling shrimpy compared to him.


While looking a bit like a disgruntled demon being woken up she still had the straight back and dignified air of the princess he kept calling her. Her tone flat and tilted with a might of sarcasm,” If you really wanted to do that, I’m sure you’d have just barged in without the politeness of knocking first, what can I do for you Saami?”


Even now, she was surprised that the crew had trusted her so quickly after presenting her case, but she was still wary of them. She hadn't had a clean life, having ties to terrorists, even if it wasn't direct was a serious stain almost as black as her hair. She wouldn't have doubted if the crew was suspicious of her, even if they wouldn't say so outloud.
 
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Saami simply raised an eyebrow at the surprisingly unsightly lady, and though her form still upheld some honour despite the layers of unkempt, he couldn't exactly say it looked particularly gratifying. He didn't have any right to judge seeing that as his nonchalance and attitude were the things making him appear sloppy at best, but honestly he didn't exactly give a damn anymore about what rights he had and didn't have. Hence his very eloquent reply. <span style="color:#006666;">"Well fuck you look horrible. I wanted to see if you're alive, but nevermind that."</span> Yet his facade of not quite caring seemed to be broken a little bit by curiosity. Enough for him to actually ask a follow up question. <span style="color:#006666;">"What in the world are you doing in there anyway? Having a three day chat with your secret overlords?"</span> Yes, he didn't trust her. But quite frankly, he didn't trust anyone anymore besides himself. It wasn't like he didn't make that clear either, his eyes already peering past her quickly taking in everything he could see before returning to her to await her answer. Even if his stance and the way he held himself showed nonchalance and carelessness, there was a very slight sharpness to his eyes that hinted at him being more than just a very distrusting and cynical teen.


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Though she gave the slightest smirk it disappeared as quickly as it had shown itself," Thanks for the compliment." she stepped aside, having insisted for days that she had nothing to hide, she invited him into the room. " Yeah, listening to a three day lecture from the imaginary embodiments of justice, honor and righteousness...you wouldn't believe how nosy they are." she stepped further into the room. Crossing to the table to tidy up a bit, with the sparsity of contents inside, it largely meant that she was straightening the papers into a pile and tossing a pen into a makeshift holder. All of her personal belongings were stored in a suitcase under the bed.


" Writing, actually." she said turning to face him, her hand resting on the tabletop. " My thoughts, recalling my experiences before I got here...sometimes just for the sake of writing. Think I might be able to make an autobiography after all is said and done." holding out her arms she moved them as if presenting a title," The Hanover Rollercoaster...has a nice ring to it no?" she looked at him and smiled slightly," Or perhaps The Princess Diaries."


She was doing her best to be friendly, make conversation but she couldn't help feeling a mite uneasy.
 
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Saami reluctantly stepped in at the invitation, looking at the stacks of papers and then snickered. <span style="color:#006666;">"Wow, you're running a museum in here or what?"</span> Taking one of the papers he held it in front of him flopping it a bit as if he was disbelieving that it was real.<span style="color:#006666;"> "You know, I didn't expect you to be so stupid as to have to use this ancient shit to write on. But then again, you're writing a book about yourself while on a life threatening mission for a rebellion."</span> The disdain dripped from his words, looking at her in contempt as he dropped the paper. <span style="color:#006666;">"Whoops, you should pick that up. And maybe take your brain off of the floor while you're at it."</span> His glare slowly fell from Kira to the stack of papers beside him, a his lips curling in a grin as he took some of the top papers. Pretending to read them carefully he started his descent into hate. <span style="color:#006666;">"Boring,"</span> with a flick of his hand he threw the paper away, continuing on to the next, <span style="color:#006666;">"stupid, grammar mistake, oh, fucking boring again." </span>With each paper he appeared to have more and more fun in throwing it, laughing at her despite trying to look serious. <span style="color:#006666;">"I think the problem is just that you're boring. Might as well try again once you find that shred of intelligence."</span> With a careless gesture he dumped all the papers in his hand on the floor. <span style="color:#006666;">"Here, have some extra time to look."</span> Still grinning he turned around and walked out of her room, pretty pleased with himself over putting the prissy princess in her place. Though for a slight moment his grin seemed to get less, his eyes darting sideways for a second. He didn't look back, never turned around to help, but still knew that what he had done was wrong. He just couldn't find something in him that actually cared more than that. So instead he just laughed it off trying to forget he was guilty.


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Adira had begun walking through the ship once she was done reminiscing. There would be merit in learning the layout of this ship well, as well as the <em>Lullaby</em>'s. Though, she didn't plan on keeping it for long. This was a shitty ship, after all. As she walked through the halls, she passed the crews' quarters just in time to see Saami walking out of Kira's room. What had the prick been doing in there? At one time she wouldn't have thought anything of it, but he had begun lashing out wherever he could. A peek into the room revealed papers scattered everywhere, and a rather bedraggled Kira. It was rather easy to assume Saami was at fault here. Adira sighed quietly and smiled slightly to the girl. <span style="color:#006600;">"Dare I ask what happened?" </span> <span style="color:#000000;">The young Captain stepped into the room - she didn't need to be invited in, she was the Captain, it was technically </span><span style="color:#000000;"><em>her</em></span><span style="color:#000000;"> stolen ship. Without asking permission, Adira knelt and began picking up the papers. "</span><span style="color:#006600;">You have to be careful miss Hanover, papers are easily lost."</span><span style="color:#000000;"> After picking up a good-sized pile of paper, Adira stood up, held them out to Kira, and quietly said,</span><span style="color:#006600;"> "I'll talk with him." </span><span style="color:#000000;">She couldn't quite bring herself to be mad at Saami, but she was rather... disappointed? They could sort it out later. At the moment, Kira seemed understandably upset. So far, Adira had nothing against the girl, but she was inexperienced in battle and seemed to have rather few practical skills for a rogue ship. But crew was scarce, and Kira was supposedly allied with their side. Though Adira had never really had an actual conversation with the girl, so maybe she shouldn't have been so quick to judge, in their line of work one needed to be practically cautious. Now was a moment for a conversation though, if the mafia princess was wanting to speak, anyway.</span>


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Kira had watched Saami drop the papers, they scattered like the pieces of her old life, fluttered all over the floor. The only sign she'd been affected by his act was the fists her hands made. She got distracted by the pattern the papers had made and didn't notice when Adira had come in until she was picking up the papers," Oh...thank you captain." she held out her hands to take the pile from Adira," <strong>It's alright, not a big deal...really. A bit of hazing is all. He's right at least a little bit, this is practically a museum huh?</strong>" she said with a soft smile, indicating the papers. " <strong>I couldn't sleep....didn't want to use up computer space on something so frivolous. It's a journal.</strong>" she explained. "<strong>Uh, I know that I'm more of a passenger here, but, I'm good with computers, programming and such, so if anything comes up, please let me give it a shot. I won't let you down. I'm also pretty good with numbers, I worked with my father who is the CFO of Hayanase Enterprises.</strong>" She pulled her braid forward over her shoulder, a self-conscious act. She sounded a little eager, even to her own ears, but despite the practical pleading in her voice, her face remained a monument to neutrality.


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Adira shook her head a bit, dismissing the thank-you and handed her the papers. "<span style="color:#006600;">It wasn't okay. He knows I don't tolerate general assholery, and I've just been going easy on him lately. If this is how you wish to pass the time, then so be it, but that doesn't make it ridiculous or okay for Saami to mess with.... And, personally, I don't think it's frivolous."</span><span style="color:#000000;"> Adira was honest in that: maybe putting thought on paper was a good idea. She didn't do it, but if it made Kira happy and didn't hurt anyone, who cared? Saami had been out of his bounds in behaving as he had. Kira's comments about her skills in programming and technology surprised Adira a bit. Well, at least the girl knew her place; she was more of a passenger at the moment, after all. But those skills could come in use once in a while. Adira smiled kindly to her. "</span><span style="color:#006600;">If anything comes up in that area, I'll let you know."</span><span style="color:#000000;"> Did Kira even know the other skill she was showing? besides her voice and her moving her hair, the girl was nearly a statue. With a bit of training, Kira had the potential for an excellent liar, which was useful. Now that Kira was seen to, Adira politely said, "</span><span style="color:#006600;">Now, if you will excuse me, I need to go find that asshole," </span><span style="color:#000000;">before walking out and after Saami. She already knew where to find him, the observation deck.</span>


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ThIs new vessel, this new crew, they were so much more rugged than what Yalyax was accustomed too in the human embassy. They weren't part of the Solar Empire anymore and just like the they called their adversaries, were vigilantes and criminals alike. Is crime ever justifies if the best intentions are at mind? The alien couldn't decide if he knew the answer or not, he supposed he must believe it as he threw his life away at the comfortable embassies and excited council meetings for the dangers of a rouge lifestyle. We'll within his mission parameters, he was experiencing the Humans at what he decided was their best possible outcome. Even the few can save the many, and when many decide that a life is worth less than another, it is up to those few to show them the err of their way.


Still, this cramped new tin-can of a vessel was insultingly low-tier. It was as if he were being drawn by a chariot by his own standard of technology and his sleek, sharp, armored suit reflected such. The black was deep and contrasted the vibrant white plates that made up the suit, it was difficult to tell what was skin, and what was armored plate thanks to his pale complexion and the only Vista of true color on the xeno was his eyes. Glowing like two illuminated pools as they scanned the rusted interior of the vessel.


Hunched ever so slightly, Yalyax remained in the engine room, vigilantly dedicating his time to make what repairs, improvements, and corrective and preventative maintenance he could preform with what primitive and mediocre tools and supplies were available. Still, he was a bonified genius among the humans and surely impressed those who witnessed his art. Like a surreal movie, the alien's hands flashed from console to console, his feet gliding across the deck without a sound. Around him floated several tech manuals that his eyes escaped too from time to time only to have the manual fall from the air and a tool replace it and begin working on the machinery. Like a hall of ghosts, the alien controlled the tools with his mind and effectively killed two birds with a single stone, as small as the birds were.
 
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Saami was still grinning a little bit by the time the captain came in, but didn't even try to pretend not to be enjoying himself. Pressing a few last buttons he nonchalantly leant back in the chair, not facing her or acknowledging her beyond his talking. <span style="color:#006666;">"You came to defend Princess Potluck? I was just having some fun."</span> He made it sound as if it was innocent and nothing foul, just a game. And maybe to him it was, but it also appeared that he simply couldn't find a better argument for his behaviour than that he had wanted to. Yet he appeared too stuck in it and he'd defend himself to the grave even if there was nothing worth defending. <span style="color:#006666;">"I was just teaching her her place. It's not like I fucking hit her, so don't start whining."</span> He was already replying to an accusation that hadn't been made yet, revealing that he did know he was wrong. Just too stubborn and not daring to admit he was the bad one, as it would destroy most of the sliver of self-worth left. Mostly he was trying to defend himself against his own conscience when it came down to it.


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Adira leaned against the doorframe as she listened to him, then walked up and smacked the back of his head lightly. "<span style="color:#006600;">And that's me teaching you your place. It's not like I really hit you, so don't whine."</span><span style="color:#000000;"> She crossed her arms and looked down at him. Yes, this was better than fake-robot Saami, but did he feel like it was? He obviously knew that he'd done wrong. So why was he lashing out in such a manner? Just to feel like he could? Or to get attention, maybe? To assert dominance somehow? Saami was still new to the "being normal" thing, so Adira felt an obligation to help him.</span><span style="color:#006600;"> "I'm not here to defend her, I'm here to tell you that you're an ass. You could have done nothing wrong, but I still need to tell you, you've been a real asshole lately and it's getting very annoying very quickly." </span><span style="color:#000000;">That had been brewing for a little while, admittedly. She couldn't hold too much against him, but then again, she was his friend and his captain, so she needed to curb his self-destructing behavior early, before it was too late and he was permanently and asshole. </span><span style="color:#006600;">"Look, I'm not going to nag on you, because you know how you're acting and you know what you did was wrong. I </span><span style="color:#006600;"><em>am</em></span><span style="color:#006600;"> going to tell you that it's getting annoying, and that you're not making any friends here." </span><span style="color:#000000;">Her voice softened some. How could she get him to understand? She wasn't mad, she was disappointed.</span><span style="color:#006600;"> "You're just making things harder on yourself, Sam. I know you're a nice guy in reality, but acting like this is only going to hurt you."</span>


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The disappointment was somehow far worse than if she had been angry, and the light smack had even less of an impact. Still his first reaction was to get angry instinctively, biting his lip and having a hard time not making fists. He'd try to automatically dismiss anything she said as being stupid and simply not seeing the fun in it, but it was hard to ignore her words when he couldn't really either. Yet the more the words hit him, the angrier he became, not quite sure if it was directed at her, the world or himself. Maybe he did just hate everything for leading up to here: Kira for not defending herself, Adira for not just keeping her mouth shut, the world for making him and himself for not doing anything right. But by the end of it Adira had made the wrong assumption, or perhaps better said the right one in the wrong light. Finally his silence broke, and in his anger he nearly fell over the loudness of his words. <span style="color:#006666;">"Why would I want to make any fucking friends? To watch them getting blown up again, or torn apart or just... just hate me for what I am!"</span> Standing up he was clearly having trouble not to lose control and shout at the top of his lungs. All the anger not in his voice redirected in his gestures and stance. <span style="color:#006666;">"I'm gonna get fucking hurt again anyway!"</span> <em>So I'll just do it myself?</em> By now the near powerlessness in holding back his rage had made him slam the button to open the door slightly too hard. Feeling his arm go hot with pain only made him progress from pissed into seething rage and then finally led to a high pitched, whiny 'ah'. It could have been nearly comical if it weren't for the sound being filled with shame, sadness and hurt. Yet in the end it only made him embarrassed and angry, leading him to just storm out into the hallway faster. Though halfway through getting to his room the rage settled and he was just left with the shame and grief it originated from. Realising that he had just half cussed out one of the few people who still cared, his arm hurting and his mind was just a broken mess, he still tried not to show, but the more he thought about it the less control he had. Starting with his lip quivering and by the time he had entered his room he could barely see the outlines through his tears. Sulking in the corner he laid his head down on his knees. The dim thud of metal being the last thing he wanted to hear right then; sending him over the edge into heavy sobs. <em>Just leave me alone. I'll get you hurt anyway...</em>


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Well, that had been an outburst. Adira watched as Saami stormed away and sighed. The poor kid needed to catch a break somewhere, but life wasn't giving him one. It wasn't giving any of them one. But she still knew that she was right: acting this way was only going to hurt him. Since Saami was one of the few remaining members of her <em>Lullaby</em> family - her only family - she felt responsible for him, and lately he'd been acting more like a child than a peer. And angry child, too. All she wanted was to keep her family together and happy, even if it took convincing and even blood she'd try to make things right by her family. As for Saami, though... well, she'd let him simmer down a bit and then go to see him, maybe help him, if he would let her. That was the big part, if he would let her. Like a tired mother, she sat down in the Captain's seat and sighed heavily. She could understand his sentiment.... <em><span style="color:rgb(0,102,102);">"I'm gonna get fucking hurt again anyway."</span></em><span style="color:#000000;"> Hadn't they all been hurt by that bombing, in some way or another? And didn't friendship or happiness or love usually end in pain? But had that made the good times they'd had together any worse? Sure there was that pain, but eventually it would wear off... right? Right?</span>


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It hadn't taken long after Adira left for Kira's stomach to signal that she hadn't eaten for awhile. As much as she wanted to simply leave the room her mother's voice reacted in her ear, a jumbled mess of words about being presentable and holding herself responsible, it was all interrupted by another large growl. Carefully unbraiding her hair she took a brush to it, working out the knots and then straightened her bangs down. Satisfied, she stepped out of her room and closed the door, she heard the sound of footsteps down the hall, followed by the sound of sobbing. She glided down the hall like a phantom, peeking into Saami's room, she stood in the doorway silent as a cat, slowly she stepped over the threshold.


Recalling how her mother would rub her back when she was upset, Kira slowly kneeled beside Saami, and touched his back carefully, running her fingers over his shirt, she didn't say anything, just let him know she was there. By all rights she probably shouldn't be there, by the way he'd treated her, should probably be angry, fuming. But...who was she kidding, she deserved their ire. Still though, her instinct told her he needed maybe just a little reassurance, she tucked her hair behind an ear, increasing the pressure just a little on his back, running her hand along his upper back.
 
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Saami had heard someone come in his room, but hadn't expected it to be Kira. Between sobs he looked up, only to be very confused about seeing her. So much in fact he fell silent for a while trying to fit it together. It didn't make sense, why would she try to comfort him? He'd been the one hurting her, if anything she should be the one returning that. Yet then the realisation set in that she was looking at him, seeing his most vulnerable side, and suddenly the confusion wasn't his biggest problem anymore with her being there. Averting his eyes he tried to stop sniffling and used his sleeves to wipe the tears away. <span style="color:#006666;">"Go away... I don't want you here."</span> Half because he was embarrassed, half because he didn't want to get close to her. It'd just be another person to worry about, someone to lose, and he'd had his fill of losing people. Besides, he didn't need her pity, it just made him feel like he was right to think of himself as broken. If even strangers attempted to comfort him, then it had to be obvious hadn't it? Then why, even if he had three perfectly fine other corners to go to, did he stay put? If he disliked it that much he could just go.


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<span style="font-family:'Titillium Web';">Jericho, after his initial embarrassment with Saami's first close encounter with death, has faded into the background of everywhere he goes. A silent workhorse, perfect for the enclosed interiors of the Lullaby and the new ship he has been tasked with caring for, he had gained an affinity for anonymity, and his occupation was now entirely behind the scene. He had been fixing the filters scattered throughout the corridor when the shout-fest in the bridge was heard, and after the boy retreated in utter defeat, Jericho watched behind his dull, matte and sunken eyes. Whatever ails Saami, he would need to find out later. He must first inspect the damage done. Like any good mechanic. His dress shoes made satisfying scrunches and taps as he walked to the bridge door. While initially walking quickly to cover sufficient distance, he began to slow down his stride to listen for any hints as to what was happening behind the door. His hands by his side, the whir of his mind ever present, he looked for disruptions in the uniform sound of his body. Anything to prepare him for what lay beyond. </span>


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She smiled at his reaction, and while she did stop the back rub she didn't leave, instead she dropped down beside him, her back to the wall. Pulling her hair forward over the shoulder farther from him and carefully pulled her fingers through the ends to keep them from tangling. Still, she didn't say a word. He could kick her out if he wanted to, she'd leave on her own but only if he asked nicely. Her strange form of retribution against his angsty attitude. She sat for a good minute or two before she crossed her legs at her ankles, creating a crease in the black slacks she wore, she pursed her lips and shifted to get rid of the crease, straightened her pants and set her leg back down. She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye then examined her fingernails, picking a bit of dirt from her thumbnail, then holding her hand out. She glanced at him again and offered Saami a slight, friendly smile, just a half turn of her lips. There was no pity in her gaze, no teasing, no anger, just a gentle offer of silence and understanding.


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