thread no longer active

[Redfork2000]

Age actually doesn't matter to me at all. I'm old enough and wise enough to know that age has nothing to do with creative responsibility. A fourty-year-old man with a wife and several kids will still play a melodramatic meathead who monologues mid-fight and grins after his blood is drawn. And a sixteen-year-old boy will still write a practical, realistic, interesting character.

Creative tastes and responsibility is what you're chasing, not a certain age group. Worst thing you an do as a role player is limit yourself to certain age demographics. It really means nothing, lol.

I agree entirely with this. And while I do my best to respect everyone's preferences and tastes, in my experience there really isn't much difference when it comes to age. In fact some of my best roleplaying experiences have been with users that are considerably younger than me, and I've also have some very good roleplays with users that are about ten or fifteen years older than me.

I think it's more of a matter of what you're looking to roleplay. See, if you're looking to play dark and gritty stuff, or themes like drugs, mental disorders and abusive relationships, that kind of stuff that is generally considered to be 18+, then I think it would make sense to prefer roleplaying with only adults. It may have to do with my own dislike for everything overly dark and gritty, but interestingly enough, I've seen teens that just love that kind of stuff as well, so even then there's something to consider. While my own tastes have changed slightly, to be honest I haven't changed too much since I was 12-13 years old in terms of my writing preferences and style. I've just become a better writer through experience, but my preferences have remained very similar. It's very unlikely there'd be something I'd be willing to roleplay now that I wouldn't have roleplayed several years ago, and while I understand that's not the case for everyone, I sometimes find it a bit odd that people seem to be so strict about this age limit thing. I respect everyone's preference and tastes, but sometimes I feel like it just limits and wastes the potential for finding new roleplayers to roleplay with.

And yes, I understand the mathematical and statistical explanation of why people tend to gravitate towards certain age ranges, but in my personal opinion that really overlooks the amount of wasted potential roleplay partners available. It also doesn't completely solve the problem of finding roleplay partners with the maturity level you're looking for. Sometimes I've roleplayed with people who are much older than me (and I emphasize "sometimes", as it's a low percentage of cases) yet I feel like I'm writing with someone who is younger than me, whether because of how they write or because of how they express themselves when we have a disagreement. While it's true that maturity increases with age, age limits aren't a perfect solution, and in my personal experience I haven't found a large enough variation in maturity levels between roleplaying age groups as to feel restricting myself to a certain age group will solve this problem at all.

It may also have to do with how people say things. Sometimes people are respectful about their preferences and will say it in a way that doesn't sound rude or offensive, and I'm ok with it. But then there's someone who is very rude or even aggressive over this, and that just draws me away from them immediately. It's more than just them being direct about their preferences, but rather it's because they say it in a way that doesn't show much respect for people who don't fit their preferences. I emphasize on the fact that this isn't the majority, and it's limited to a small fraction of the people who have age restrictions, so I'm not implying everyone does it. I'd compare it to when people are mean about their preferences in just about any other area, which is why I feel this is a very valid question to make. My answer would be to just try to make your preferences clear from the start, but respectfully. Personally, when I first message someone after reading their interest check, I don't limit myself to saying hello and that I want to roleplay, but instead I make sure to also add an in-depth explanation of my roleplaying style and preferences, so that the other person can evaluate if I'd be a good roleplaying partner for them. Everyone who has done a 1x1 RP with me knows I do this when I first message someone. And while it's not necessary to go all in-depth as I do, you could use your first post to make clear what you're ok with and what you're not ok with. For example something like this:

"Hello, I was reading your interest check, and I'm interested in starting a roleplay with you. Before I get into the plots and pairings that I'm interested in trying, first I'll tell you a bit about me as a roleplayer.

-I'm X years old, and prefer to roleplay with people that are X years or older.

-I'm interested in these genres, and play this type of characters.

-I write this much per post, and tend to reply to my roleplays this frequently.

-I prefer to avoid these themes or settings in my roleplays.

-(Anything else you consider important to mention)

I'm interested in these pairings and plots you mentioned in your interest check:

-Plot or pairing

-Plot or pairing

-Plot or pairing

Let me know if you're interested in roleplaying with me."

That's how I'd structure it. Make it clear from the start that you prefer roleplaying with a certain age group, and if in their reply they don't specify their age, then you could reply something like:

"(Answer to what they said in their post)

By the way, in my first post I mentioned I'm only comfortable roleplaying with people that are X years or older. I just want to make sure you're X age or older before we continue any further."

Keep in mind that the person could clearly see your age requirement from your first post, so if they ignored it that's on them. The key is to be clear from the start about what you're looking for, but doing so in a way that doesn't seem unrespectful. You don't even need to ask for a specific age, just asking them if they are X years or older should be enough. Keep in mind though that there's people that'll simply lie about their age so as to roleplay with you, so even this won't guarantee you play with only certain age groups entirely. I do believe this might be one of the best ways to mention age requirements without coming off as entitled or rude. You want to make it clear that this is an important point for you, but do it in a respectful manner.

Hopefully everything I said helped at least a bit. I agree that this is a very interesting topic, and I understand the worry about trying to not come off as rude when this question is asked. I've seen it done poorly in some cases, and it drove me away from those roleplayers even though I was in the age group they were looking for. I've also seen cases of people I've roleplayed with first pretending they're older than me, and then one day they reveal that they're a lot younger than they said they were, so there really is no way to make sure the other person isn't a minor. I had this one case where I roleplayed on another site with someone who said to be one or two years older than me, but they only revealed their true age once they turned 18 a couple of years later.

So... that's all I have to say. Hopefully it helps. have a good day!

 

[NesyCelvestian]

I typically accept everyone's age and whoever they are. I still do respect others age barriers anyway and what they prefer. I'm 15, but still quite creative and sometimes it gets a little ignored anyway.

 

[NesyCelvestian]

I do believe that our opinions are in different ends of the spectrum when it comes to age restrictions, and even though I don't agree with certain points, I respect your opinion and I can totally understand it.
Indeed, the roleplays I am interested in always touch issues such as drugs, abusive relationships, etc., and therefore, as these issues need a great deal of maturity in order to be portrayed, I don't feel comfortable to roleplay them with minors. In fact, slightly on line with what you mentioned, my interest in these topics was always present from a young age. My younger version wouldn't be as mature as me nowadays, but I believe that, having in consideration my life experience and emancipation, maturity wouldn't be a problem regarding such issues. With this last affirmation, I am not saying that having a troubled life is necessary in order to be mature, nor am I trying to put myself in a pedestal regarding such issue, nor brag about myself, much less creating a "pitty party". It simply means that my younger self would have the maturity to roleplay with me at the moment, for example.

But such uncomfortableness comes from a social side as well. It looks totally different to engage in social activities with children online and offline, you see? I feel definitely like relating to my roleplay partner is necessary if we are going to write together, at least when it comes to interests. When it comes to personalities, that would definitely be nice, as then maybe some sort of friendship could flourish, but in such matter, age would still be very important. Yet, when roleplaying, I don't really have friendship in mind, especially after a bad experience in the past, regarding friendships, roleplaying and maturity, this last one coming from age and life experience issues. Therefore, using such bad experiences of the past, I am extra careful when it comes to future roleplay partners. But the preponderant reason has to do with the generational alienation that comes from interacting with a minor online. Something about this feels off and definitely dodgy. It's a personal thing, maybe because I always preferred to engage with people way older than me. It's something very personal, and I deeply think that it is not negative. it is simply a preference, such as writing a certain word count per post, certain themes, etc.

This last topic, however, I couldn't agree more with you on that. Being respectful about such preferences is so important, and I always try to approach people in a respectful way. That's the reason why I never ask people for a certain age, I just ask them to confirm that they are over a certain age. And whilst this does not validate such claims, at least, it puts a responsibility on such roleplayer for their own maturity, for their principles too. If we match as roleplayers even though such age is not the truth, then, it is actually a good thing. But lying about something that was referred to as important to the other person reveals, in fact, some lack of maturity, right?

Thank you so much for your insight on the topic!


That is frustrating. I can tell you that I passed through the same, in my daily life, actually. And at the time I didn't understand such limitations, feeling completely alienated from the things that I enjoyed, because I couldn't participate in them freely, due to age restrictions. Nowadays, however, I understand why such restrictions were imposed, and I am glad that they were imposed, actually.
These restrictions do not invalidate your skills as roleplayer nor your overall maturity, I really want to emphasise this.
It might be disappointing, indeed. That's why I believe that, regardless if you have any intention of roleplaying or not, leaving a message or simply a "like" when someone posts a plot you enjoy is crucial, since it encourages people to keep up with their good work.

It's a pretty good thing to know when you post a like on someone's forums. I usually didn't do that because I felt alienated or scared at first. Of course, I do have to put the first step someday. But thanks for your insight, Its really enjoyable to have the same view as someone else!

 

[AndPeggy]

I'm in my 30s and it makes me uncomfortable to RP with teenagers. I won't do it, full stop. No one should be made to do anything they're uncomfortable with.

 

[Crayons]

I don't feel like most people are following the same criteria as the film association and some people don't state why they prefer audiences of a certain age. I'm sure most people are genuine when they ask for age restrictions with their roleplaying patterns but the abundance is absolutely alarming. My forming concerns are that there won't be any spaces left for minors searching for roleplays. It can be a frustrating process on its own as it is without worrying about age given all of the requirements people seek. Adding one more need in the haystack can be the difference between someone leaving their site out of a feeling of defeat or actually enjoying their time. The worst I can see happening is that this site basically becomes a community of adults even though the site says that anyone over the age of 13 is allowed to join, which I believe is a statement that should never have to change.

You know, I don't think it's as bad as all that. There's enough minors here and in roleplay in general that minors can rp with other minors, even if all adults refused to play with them which isn't generally the case.

 

[rae2nerdy]

Roleplaying "mature" topics is something that not every teenager is able of doing so with maturity. Obviously, there are so many counter examples to what was just mentioned, but statistically speaking the amount of teenagers that are able to handle such situations in a realistic and/or respectful way is more reduced than if you are speaking about an adult population. With this, I also want to emphasise that there are adults who are completely immature and that behave like children.
I am speaking statistically, and as any statistical analysis, certainties are never inferred. Therefore, statistical data shall never be used as absolutes, but rather as what is the closest to reality at the moment.

Aside from a maturity preference, it feels uncomfortable to just message a random child on the Internet.

It's a matter of comfort. Some people are comfortable with some things and others don't. And I think that, in the end, being comfortable is the base condition in order to have fun whilst roleplaying.

I mean I think Musicians point was more about roleplayers like me.

My roleplays are basically about slice of life topics such as : the magic of friendship, magical farms, campy superheroes, found family, etc.

I don’t do any kind of mature topic at all. I think the closest is some of my characters swear and I will as well in the OOC. But it’s like a 5% number of OCs and I am not emotionally connected to using naughty words. So if my partners were like “hey can you/character X not swear.” I would be fine.

So for myself I absolutely don’t mind contacting kids. If they don’t want to contact me that’s fine but I don’t have anything I am worried about when it comes to talking to them or roleplaying with them.

 

[Onmyoji]

Most people who put the restriction are those who rp 1x1 and a lot of them in PM.

Imagine you're, let's say, 50 years old. And you start a private 1x1 rp with a 13-yr old. Even if your rp is completely innocent and is only about friendship and adventures. One day the child's parents find your private roleplay and learn that you're a 50-year-old creep who is pretending to be someone else in a private conversation with their child.
Do you want all that negativity shoved your way? I doubt that.

The older you become, the harder it becomes to explain what you're doing in a roleplay community full of younger people. So naturally older roleplayers tend to gravitate towards their own age circle.
Inherently there is nothing wrong to roleplay with someone who can be the age of your kid / parents. But it just feels wrong for many people. Call it social pressure if you'd like, but a lot of people would say it's creepy. I've had minors refuse to rp with me when they learnt that I'm a lot older than them, and I hold no grudge against them.

When you're 20 and a 17yr old wants to rp with you it's not that big of a difference. But when you're like 25+ then suddenly roleplaying with someone who is 13-14 feels strange. And it feels strange for both sides. There is too big of a gap. I'm not talking about levels of writing. I've personally met 13-yr olds who write better than 25-yr olds. But interests, problems, life experience, would be too different.
And when you're holding a private conversation/roleplay you'd want to talk to someone... closer to the way you are?

Group roleplays have a lot less age gates, because there is not just two people, there is a group of players with different age and background. It feels less creepy when you're not alone. And people can still socialize more with others closer to their age, and it often happens.


I agree that there is a lot of age gating, but most of that applies to private 1x1 roleplays. There are still plenty of minors and adults who don't mind the age, there are group roleplays. New people keep coming to the community so I doubt it will ever become 'too old' and exclude all minors.

 

[rae2nerdy]

Yes, I can see that such restriction on age would be a bit looser if we are speaking about topics that are not mature.
However, I don't think that such invalidates people that, still not roleplaying heavy topics and being adults prefer to roleplay with people from their age range.
I guess that this is really a personal preference, and it is great that people are totally fine with opening up their restrictions when it comes to age-related matters.

Yeah I am fine with people having a preference. I think Musician and I were pointing out an assumption people have. That because you are an adult you must automatically talk only about mature adult topics.

Or that if an adult contacts a child than it must automatically be because that adult is trying to tak about mature topics with someone under age.

Meanwhile I am like - excuse you I and my fifteen year old partner are talking unicorn subspecies and sustainable farming.

 

[Crayons]

Most people who put the restriction are those who rp 1x1 and a lot of them in PM.

Imagine you're, let's say, 50 years old. And you start a private 1x1 rp with a 13-yr old. Even if your rp is completely innocent and is only about friendship and adventures. One day the child's parents find your private roleplay and learn that you're a 50-year-old creep who is pretending to be someone else in a private conversation with their child.
Do you want all that negativity shoved your way? I doubt that.

Not only negativity, but if you work with children, something like this could cause you to lose your job if the parents complain, even though the roleplay in question was perfectly innocent. It could be considered to be grooming of a minor or at the least look creepy. I don't have any kids, but if I did, I definitely wouldn't want them having private roleplays with a much older person online. I'd feel better about it if I could chat to the person and get to know them a bit but even so...

Group RPs are different, because it's more of a public situation.

Issues of maturity are second to that imo. I've known super mature 17 year olds, and 25 year olds still playing crappy Mary Sue edgelords.

 

[Onmyoji]

Not only negativity, but if you work with children, something like this could cause you to lose your job if the parents complain, even though the roleplay in question was perfectly innocent. It could be considered to be grooming of a minor or at the least look creepy.

exactly. There were quite a few teachers who got scolded for being too friendly with children like talking about their hobbies on their Facebook and such. Laws change, and the way people react to these things also became more extreme nowadays compared to what was a few years ago. Not everyone is willing to risk it.

 

[Onmyoji]

As a teacher, that problem can be avoided by simply knowing how you need to act around children. Knowing not to ask strange children about their personal lives should be common knowledge whether you're a teacher or not.

Yes. I fully agree with that.

But can you be certain that a roleplay, which is pretending to be someone else and writing about 'personal life' of a fictional character will be taken well if such matter arises?
And would all people be fine not knowing anything about their rp partner, like at all? Some people would be, but things like 'what hobbies do you have?' or 'do you like anime?' can also be viewed as strange and personal, depending on how you look at it. And can still be viewed creepy if it's an adult asking a child.

I know it already sounds like paranoia, but I'm talking about hypothetical situation.

 

[rae2nerdy]

Also I would think you aren’t using your real name or identity on RPN? So how is anyone supposed to contact your employer to tell them that you are on a relatively niche website talking to minors?
1. How are you supposed to talk to anyone if you can’t definitively prove they ARENT minors and just lying about it or not bringing up their age?

2. How are you supposed to be doxxed by concerned parents in the event you do end up talking to a minor? If anything I would be more concerned about a parent that is so controlling of their kids lives that they are doxing total strangers online.

Like I think sometimes people come up with scenarios to justify a preference that are just absurd. Or that point to a totally different much worse problem. Cuz essentially the root of all the scare mongering is that someone is going to find out your real identity and share it with the cops. Which to me is a waaaaaaay bigger red flag than whether I talked to a fifteen year old about unicorns.

Just say it makes you uncomfortable. You don’t have to justify it further than that.

 

[Onmyoji]

Yes that's right. But so far it's still an issue. And it is an issue many people explain their unwillingness to rp with people who are too young / too old with.

And yes, it makes me uncomfortable. The doxxing cases I've witnessed were not pretty.

 

[rae2nerdy]

Doxxing can be used as a powerful weapon. I am not saying that a stranger on the internet is going thought any type of effort of actually exposing you, but there have been many cases of people close to the one who was doxxed actually took the time to hack some of that person's accounts and go through a lot of their internet activity, decontextualising it and then present it as evidence of some sort of criminal activity.

I think that something similar can happen with roleplaying. Honestly, I think it is a valid reason to worry about.

Yeah but that isn’t linked to the age of the person on the other side of the keyboard. I have heard of significantly more cases of people who are the SAME age or of a similar age doxxing their partners because they have a toxic sense of entitlement to their partners time/attention.

So I am not saying doxxing isn’t a thing. I am saying it is a totally separate issue to age based preferences.

Like if you are scared of doxxing you would be far better off ignoring toxic roleplayers who spam your inbox if you dare to take a pee than you would be not roleplaying with kids. Unless those kids happen to also be toxic role players who throw a tantrum if you leave the site for five minutes.

I mean I get spiraling into worse case scenarios (I have anxiety myself) I am just saying you don’t have to be worried about some worst case scenario to just say “No thanks, I don’t roleplay with kids.”

Most people aren’t so thin skinned and self-absorbed that they need you to justify yourself beyond that.

 

[Onmyoji]

It was mostly in response to statement that adults are too engrossed in rp with other adults which makes it harder for younger roleplayers to find partners. So we were exploring the reasons why adults often age gate their rp.

Which doesn't mean all of them use those reasons.

There is clearly age gating issue, but it's also a matter of preference for many people without any extra reasons.

 

[Reid]

Honestly, I have since put my age on my profile and the current thread I've been bumping in the interest checks mention that I prefer 18+ roleplayers. It's much easier.

I've been in the roleplaying scene since I was really young (9 or 10 I think?) And while to me, it's not weird and it's pretty normal, to an outsider roleplaying can look... Weird. So I can understand why adults might not want to roleplay with minors, even if the roleplay itself is innocent enough. Because an outsider is just gonna see "40 year old writing some fake strange scenario about magic rainbows with a 13 year old" and think they're looking at an episode of TCAP. Roleplaying is a pretty niche thing as a whole.

I personally have never been turned down or anything when I was a minor, because the spaces I gravitated towards we're usually filled with other minors (for example, I started roleplaying in elementary school in a game aimed at kids). And actually, I did join this site when I was about 14 as well and never really was shunned for my age. Now that I'm on the other side of the spectrum, I can see why an adult wouldn't want to rp with a minor. It's not because they want to do a smut roleplay or anything like that, it's just out of comfort and you don't feel like a weirdo, I suppose.
I know I'm personally still pretty young and even though I'm not longer a minor, I wouldn't be offended if someone quite a bit older than me didn't want to roleplay with a 19 year old lol. It's just how it is, you can't force someone to do something they're uncomfortable with.

 

[Crayons]

Also I would think you aren’t using your real name or identity on RPN? So how is anyone supposed to contact your employer to tell them that you are on a relatively niche website talking to minors?
1. How are you supposed to talk to anyone if you can’t definitively prove they ARENT minors and just lying about it or not bringing up their age?

2. How are you supposed to be doxxed by concerned parents in the event you do end up talking to a minor? If anything I would be more concerned about a parent that is so controlling of their kids lives that they are doxing total strangers online.

Like I think sometimes people come up with scenarios to justify a preference that are just absurd. Or that point to a totally different much worse problem. Cuz essentially the root of all the scare mongering is that someone is going to find out your real identity and share it with the cops. Which to me is a waaaaaaay bigger red flag than whether I talked to a fifteen year old about unicorns.

Just say it makes you uncomfortable. You don’t have to justify it further than that.

Yeah but that isn’t linked to the age of the person on the other side of the keyboard. I have heard of significantly more cases of people who are the SAME age or of a similar age doxxing their partners because they have a toxic sense of entitlement to their partners time/attention.

So I am not saying doxxing isn’t a thing. I am saying it is a totally separate issue to age based preferences.

Like if you are scared of doxxing you would be far better off ignoring toxic roleplayers who spam your inbox if you dare to take a pee than you would be not roleplaying with kids. Unless those kids happen to also be toxic role players who throw a tantrum if you leave the site for five minutes.

I mean I get spiraling into worse case scenarios (I have anxiety myself) I am just saying you don’t have to be worried about some worst case scenario to just say “No thanks, I don’t roleplay with kids.”

Most people aren’t so thin skinned and self-absorbed that they need you to justify yourself beyond that.

If someone wants to get the police onto you, they don't need to doxx you themselves. They report you to the police and the police find you.

You can only control your own actions. There are a lot of odd people in the world, and whether their actions are worse/crazier or better/more rational than mine is not something I have control over. I can only make moral decisions for myself. If I say "I'm not going to shoplift" and you counter with "but some people rob banks!!! That's worse!!!" like ... how is that even relevant to me? I still don't want to shoplift.

 

[Delinquent]

They report you to the police and the police find you.

Nah, any parent who reported this to the police would be laughed out of the police station.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with not roleplay with minors. But I just think that doing so to avoid legal trouble is a bit silly.

 

[Onmyoji]

It depends on place and country. Don't forget that different countries can have different laws.

So far I see two sides that don't want to accept each other's arguments lol Too paranoid and silly for one side, not cautions enough for another side. And both are valid as long as they don't force their views on others.
It all comes down to preference. There will always be adults who prefer to rp with adults only and adults who don't mind the age of their partner, there will always be minors who would have a lot more fun with other minors and finding adult roleplayers creepy and minors who don't mind the age of their partners. There will always be roleplayers on either side of the spectrum who will struggle to find partners because of their preferences.

It's just better to be upfront about your preferences to not end up being uncomfortable with rp partner for whatever reasons, be it age, gender, favorite characters or story development.

 

[Delinquent]

Don't forget that different countries can have different laws.

Yeah, but a) in no country is it illegal for an adult to talk with minors b) regardless of what country you're in the police is gonna have better things to do then investigate this.

 

[rae2nerdy]

If someone wants to get the police onto you, they don't need to doxx you themselves. They report you to the police and the police find you.

You can only control your own actions. There are a lot of odd people in the world, and whether their actions are worse/crazier or better/more rational than mine is not something I have control over. I can only make moral decisions for myself. If I say "I'm not going to shoplift" and you counter with "but some people rob banks!!! That's worse!!!" like ... how is that even relevant to me? I still don't want to shoplift.

How? Like I am trying to figure out how the local police track me down from a niche website where I don’t give any identifying information.

I mean I get that it’s possible on TV but I am pretty sure the IRL police can’t just “hack” into random people’s computer for no reason. In fact I am about certain of it as I work at a library and one of the things we are taught is what the police can and cannot ask for.

So I am sure a parent could try to call the police but
- the police station in middle of nowhere Arkansas can’t do a thing to me if I live in cornfield Iowa. So you would have to know where I live to even contact the correct police force to begin with. And I am obviously not required to tell you that.
- I believe if the “crime” crosses state lines it is the juristiction of the FBI, but you run into Deliquents point. You call the FBI and say my child is writing a story about Harry Potter with someone who is claiming to be in their thirties they aren’t going to follow up.

Honestly unless the site itself was going to give out information to help some law enforcement agency track me down I am pretty sure I am fine.

I mean I get this is a moral issue for you. I am just telling you that thinking it’s a LEGAL issue is a little silly. It’s not. Unless you are sharing child pornography or otherwise violating the terms of service for this site you aren’t breaking the law if you talk to a minor

 

[Crayons]

I think something that's being slightly overlooked here is that the word "roleplaying" outside of our little hobby has sexual connotations for most of the normies. If little Alice has been "role playing" with a fifty year old man that is going to look like grooming of a minor to most people.

IP tracing is absolutely a thing and unless you have a vpn law enforcement can very easily find you and request all your internet data from your service provider. Being the subject of a search like this can be damaging even if you haven't been doing anything dodgy or braking the law.

The legal issue, again, is not really the point. It's about being responsible if you're an adult and not opening yourself up to potential creepy weirdos as a child. We had a whole thread here at one point about weird stuff people had been asked to do by rp partners and it was full of creepy creepy stuff. Normalising one on one relationships between minors and adults is not a great idea.

Obviously there are exceptions, but in general it seems like a bad idea to me.

 

[Hella Downweather]

Technical opinion here!

The police, and especially the section dedicated to fight Child Exploitation, have dedicated hackers and IT people dedicated to fight cases like this. IP tracing (like mentioned by Crayons ) is an option that is not only used to find people, but also to convict them. Social hacking is another pretty powerful tool used by the police. Most governments also work together closely for these kind of cases. So while we are "anonymous" on RP Nation to a trained hacker it often doesn't matter, and to an accredited one, even less. It is safer to assume that when online, you are NOT completely anonymous, and I would 100% recommend NEVER picking the same username between websites (that's one of the way you can track people with social hacking ...and it lessen the risk of having multiple accounts hacked at the same time).

Sexual roleplays and erotic poems have been used to convict predators in the past, even if they were not photographic evidence but textual evidence. Though, there must be proof that 1- the convicted party knew they were dealing with a minor and 2- created these pieces of content with that in mind.

Also, you never know with whom you are dealing with. Maybe the minor you are talking with has pretty wealthy overprotective parents, that have the means of hiring a private investigator/hacker to trace you. Maybe you have been flagged on another website and are talking to a cop. Maybe the 16 years old, is an old person wanting to trick you.

Now.

Dramatics aside.

Just because something is unlikely to happen (previous cases up there) doesn't mean it can't happen. And while you probably don't think that what you are writing with a minor happens to be of a sexual/weird tone, someone else may interpret it that way, especially with the word roleplay having some pretty weird significations in our current society. This fact is enough to make a lot of people, including myself, quite skittish at the idea of roleplaying with minors. Even more so in roleplays involving romance.

Take for example anime, what is considered completely normal in that culture, can be viewed as obscene by people outside of the community.

And even if you don't end up convicted, having the charges pressed against you can be quite detrimental for your future and your mental health. Even more so if the press is making a show out of it.

 

[rae2nerdy]

I am not sure if it is that simple though. After all, if we are speaking about a European child whose parents suspect that their kid might be involved in something dangerous online and if the suspect is based on the US, cooperation between European and American authorities is something that is required, I believe, even though I guess that the trial process is conducted according to US terms since the suspect is acting from their home country. I am not sure about this though. Therefore I believe I will ask it to some of my acquaintances that study Law and/or Criminology.

I have been scrolling down through the Portuguese Constitution, and I have come across the fact that authorities cooperate with each other (which you definitely don't need to look up to in the Constitution, as it is common sense, but it was the only more useful thing that I was able to get. With a more careful search I'll probably find more useful info), but I am not sure if it happens in every single case. Still, I believe that this issue defies the true purpose of the initial point, as it can totally work differently depending on a lot of factors, I believe. Security s a factor that also can play a huge role on one's decision about roleplaying with minors because as it was mentioned, Laws change from country to country, and even if the site is hosted somewhere else, there might be consequences for people from other countries that are not the US.

It is states in the various PSA’s about sexual content that because this is a US based website they follow the US based rules about what constitutes child pornography and inappropriate content.

Further this is not consistent across the entire US so it’s possible that specific details would be in accordance with the state their server is in? I am actually not sure about that. It was sort of my point,

You can’t actually just get on the phone and call your local police force (or honestly even your equivalent of the FBI) and make a complaint about something like this. It would be seen as nothing more than time wasting unless you could

1. prove the person was breaking the law in your country
2. prove the person was breaking the law in their own country
3. have the crime be severe enough to devote man hours to an international investigation

Like if you are doing something bad enough to tick all three boxes it is very unlikely you would be allowed on this site in the first place. As we are talking a clear pattern of inappropriate behavior with multiple minors of a severity that international law enforcement gets involved.

 

[rae2nerdy]

Yes, I am aware of such. This means people need to follow American laws when posting on the website. Yet, in an hypothetical situation where parents of a minor find out that their child is into some dodgy thing online, if the child isn't American, they won't call the FBI. Here they'd call PJ, for instance (funny enough XD). And then PJ must contact American authorities and work together in order to solve the case.
And things become way more dense when we are speaking about the fact that the suspect is not in the US either.

Picture, for exame, someone who is, in fact, committing a crime using RPN, but that does not live in the US. What happens to that person? Are they bonded by American law? What if the American law is not the same as the one in their home country? What if the law says that they are committing a crime in the child's home country, but not in the US? What if the law says that they are committing a crime in their home country, but not in the US?
I don't think it would be fair for the parents and the child to have the suspect judged only solely based on American law.

Unfortunately, one must always be cautious online. As mentioned before, I don't think that what you mentioned in your last paragraph is that straight forward in every case, and taking in consideration several different international laws.

I am definitely not sure about all the facts, therefore I actually asked someone who knows about these things regarding, at least, our national law and EU laws, to make things a bit more clear.

However, delving into legal matters was never the argument's point, it was rather about being a responsible adult online, and Internet security was pointed out as one of the things to be cautious about when taking in consideration the social and cultural aspect behind adult and minor's conversations.

Again, as mentioned before, there is absolutely nothing wrong in being fine about roleplaying with children. I cannot emphasise that more than I already did.
Our side of the argument was simply commenting on what our hobby would look like to sn outsider and what such misunderstanding might imply.
I truly think that it is something rooted in our social views, that can have legal consequences, indeed, but that has a huge social side.

To be clear my point was that

1. Talking to children online is not illegal. That’s a moral issue not a legal one.

2. You can absolutely find something morally repugnant without worrying about legality. Case in point people have religious issues with homosexuality. As such they do not find it morally acceptable to talk to LGBTQ players. But if they were to say it was illegal to talk to LGBTQ people that would be a silly argument.

So that was all I am saying. Talking to an minor is not inherently illegal. It might be morally questionable to certain individuals but that is really just an opinion, not the law.

Personally I don’t ask my partners their ages so I have no idea how old they are unless they tell me. And since I am talking about fairly benign topics (Harry Potter, unicorns, sustainable farming, etc) I am not super worried about anyone getting upset regardless of their age.

If anything I would think people are more likely to dox me for my politics than they are for my age