Realistic or Modern 𝗮 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆 (𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗵𝗶𝗿𝗲)

[mother of sorrows]

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[mother of sorrows]

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[mother of sorrows]

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ji-ji

the worker bee

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just the worst luck...

this is a dialogue!

Everything was going to go perfect. This is not hope - it's a demand.

The fabric of her dress must be seconds away from falling apart with how often Ji-young has straightened it down with her hands. She turned and smiled and struck a pose in the long mirror of her room, turning this corner out and that earring more to the left. The posters on her wall judged the way she endlessly fixed escaped strands of hair, fighting her hair brush in agitation. Anxiety churned in her stomach like the world's worst stew, refusing to leave even with the words of encouragement she read off an online article. 'When trying to impress the guy of your dreams, always remember to be yourself! Show him your natural charm and charisma, and the rest will follow. #SlayQueen'

''Just be myself. Right.''

Ji-young murmured to her reflection, face uncertain and nervous.

''I can do that.''

A cheerful ringtone broke out. The girl startled out of her own thoughts, mouth falling open at the name displaying on her phone screen; he couldn't be here already, could he? Her heart hammered itself out in her chest as she practically dove for her phone singing away on her bed-side table, latching on to it as if anybody wanted to take it in the first place. She cleared her throat, flashed an award-winning smile to the mirror and tried to steady her urge to scream in terrified joy.

And in a high-pitched, not-at-all herself voice, Ji-young answered;

''Hiiiiiii, Byung-hoooon.''

・❥・
​

The ceiling shone like the undiscovered, lonely depths of the universe, crystalline chandeliers dangling over the attended tables. A quiet, intimate lightning filled the restaurant and the nightlife outside has only started to properly wake up. Soft, hazy voices fill the lull in the quietly expensive ambience, couples and families in their own bubble of conversation. White roses sat in a glass vase, the petals sweet. Ji-young's hands rested on the edge of the creamy table-cloth with careful, practiced daintiness, heart beating in her throat and red wine shaking ever so slightly in the glass she held.

Byung-hoon sat opposite of her, in a black suit and painfully handsome.

His smile is easy when he glances up at her. In the four years they've been together, the confidence that first drew her in has never waned - it only seemed to amplify, a natural trait that she admires. Ji-young has never been shy, not even as a child, but Byung-hoon's is an all-together different poise. Where Ji-young is loud and quick to befriend, he is cool and gentle in a subdued way; it's a contrast their friends have pointed out time and time again.

''So? What have you been up to?'' He asks, his fixed gaze making Ji-young almost cough out a gulp of wine. She's never quite this nervous - no, never, but his text still burns in her memories like an omen.

''Oh, you know. The usual.''

The woman swallows down the near-death experience with a generous tear of buttery garlic bread, gaze flickering every which way.

''I've started working at that company I told you.''

A hint of pride crept into the sentence - she had told Byung-hoon all about it, but she still couldn't quite believe she got a spot at Pang Technology - her! One of the biggest company giants in the country! A paid internship, maybe, but the thought of a more impressive title did nothing to dissuade her excitement. Long hours of painful studying and headaches no painkiller could stop have finally paid off and this was only an added motivation to try harder. Byung-hoon gave another one of his shining, too-bright smiles, reaching over a hand to put across hers. It was warm.

''I'm glad. It's what you should focus on now.'' There was something in his words, then. Something she could not quite place. It was gone as fast as it appeared the moment their food was served, the waiter offering to bring more water. Once again his text floats in her mind, the image clear in her head if she focuses now;

'Can we go out soon? I'd like to talk to you about something.'

The thought makes her vision swim again, chest tight with uncertain emotion; when she told her mom, the older woman smiled knowingly at the kitchen table, smug like the cat with the gossip. 'You're both old enough. It would be a good time to settle.' She had insinuated, eyebrows rising to the edge of her forehead - and when Ji-young told her friends they all looked at each other, breathless with elation. Each one of their theories sparkled like an engagement ring and they formed a gaggle around Ji-young, begging her to tell them straight after he asks.

And Ji-young?

She is not sure how to feel.

Marriage is terrifying. Marriage is one step from having children and a house and never getting a holiday again. And she loves Byung-hoon, but the way he was smiling at her across the table made her want to scream just the tiniest bit. She busied herself with pushing around a mushroom on her plate, taking a giant chomp. It seemed like an eternal curse until Byung-hoon spoke again, a thoughtful edge to his features. It make Ji-young swallow.

He laced his fingers together on the table, cleared his throat. Then;

''You know. It's been four years, Jiji. And I mean, I've been thinking...''

Ji-young gave a vague 'uh-huh', increasingly looking like a deer about to be hit by a Soviet tank.

''...we need to decide on the future. About what we want.''

His face was serious. Solemn. Ji-young took another chunk of garlic bread, wondering if your vision swimming is a natural reaction to butter.

''I care about you, Jiji. A lot. And I wish the best for you.''

She was sweating. Oh Gods, she was sweating. Don't some women lose their teeth during pregnancy? Doesn't it cost more than her entire life savings to rent out a church? Wait. A nice wedding ceremony can cost thousands...

''...Ji-young? Ji-young, are you okay?''

Byung-hoon was staring at her, now. He looked somewhat in between concern and alarm, beautiful eyes wide; Ji-young realised distantly that she must have been hyperventilating, hands gripping the table desperately.

''Yup. Totally fine.''

The woman lied, trying for a smile that ended up more of a grimace.

''Go on.''

Her boyfriend didn't seem too convinced, but he continued anyhow, gaze suddenly unable to meet hers. Tension, thick and coiling, made the air heavy to breathe like lead turned gas. Black dots swam in the corner of her vision, panic setting in. God, the average cost of a wedding is around 28,000... And she has maybe 15 von to her name...

''And I was thinking... Ji-young,''

Unable to keep the words to herself anymore, the woman blurts out,

''I don't think I'm ready.''

Just as Byung-hoon says;

''I think we should break up.''

Silence.

Very, very long silence. Ji-young took one last, quiet bite of the garlic bread.

・❥・
​

They say that when spring comes, that it never knocks on the door - that one day you wake up in your warm bed and notice that the air is light with the promise of bloom. The last snow stubbornly clung to the freshly-growing grass, but there was no denying the demand of rising temperatures. Frail little flowers began poking out of the wet earth, the grey and gloom packing up its bag and leaving in a huff. First-grades bravely stomped down the streets towards their schools, laughter and happy voices finally breaking the silence that winter brought; shrines were overpacked with starry-eyed people, praying for good luck and a beautiful spring.

Hope, brittle and new, but here nonetheless - it rose with every sunny day, even if the nights were still a bit too cold and snowflakes clung to leaning trees. Fresh, cool air drafted in from the open window, fluttering Aera's thin drapes like hair in the wind. Early morning commute went on in the road below, but today is a well-deserved holiday - even for students such as them. And especially for students such as Aera that knew stress like an old friend.

Ji-young knew she might not be helping, but she couldn't stop crying in her friends pillow anyways.

''And - and. Listen to this.''

She all but bawled, kicking her feet in frustration (and only so avoiding a fatal kick to the bedrame.)

''He. He said, 'you'll be too busy for me.'.''

Teary eyes snapped up at her friend, face blotched with hours of crying. She sniffled again, letting out another sob into the innocent pillow that was unable to escape her attack.

''And, and, that I'm too much for him.''

She grabbed hold of one of Aera's hands, squeezing it. In years of their friendship, this is not the first time Ji-young has practically lost it in front of Aera - they both have. Childhood is a frail, confused thing and they're both adults now, a long time down the line. Aera needs no more problems, she knows; not with school debt breathing down her neck and her job working her ragged. But Ji-young trusts her more than she does herself sometimes, and she couldn't help calling her so early to get it all out.

''After four years.''

Pain tore her chest into ribbons, even with the out-of-body realisation that she probably makes for an awkward sight. She doesn't like to cry, much less over men - but four years? It took him four years to find out he suddenly doesn't like her anymore? He has a right to fall out of love, but all over a job?

''I swear, I'm never talking to a man again.''

Her wild sobbing ebbed down to quieter tears, sitting up in her friends bed with the expression of a kicked puppy. Soreness filled her throat and her eyes stung with redness, lips downturned with each sniffle.

''Maybe we should just become nuns. Or live with tigers.''

Tigers might eat humans, but surely they're more agreeable than this. Maybe her and Aera could live among them and fight one for dominance?

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♡coded by uxie♡

 

[Stardust Galaxy]

cho aera

BROKE GIRL

Aera always knew that breakups were something difficult to go through. The pain of losing that special someone that you thought would be your ever after was for sure a tragic event in someone’s life, or at least that’s what she learned from binge-watching romantic movies and dramas, but to say she had the in real life experience was not really that accurate.

It wasn’t that she had never been in a relationship, but between juggling her studies, her part-time job, and the constant stress of having to join an internship with no luck whatsoever of being accepted didn’t let enough time to even think about relationships, even less thinking on developing a crush with someone. When was the last time she had a boyfriend? Oh right, it was in her senior year of high school, her first boyfriend. At that time, she felt butterflies in her stomach every time she saw him, but just like any puppy love, it wasn’t meant to survive when both of them got too busy preparing for their entry exam, and they didn’t spend any time together during that period she would have known that their relationship was doomed. Instead, they ended up breaking up amicably on their graduation day because they both knew a long-distance relationship was not going to work, and perhaps they didn’t want to accept they didn’t have any more feelings for the other.

So, was Aera really the best option to help someone in that situation and give advice? Probably not, but it was Ji-Young after all. Aera wouldn’t say no to her and would try everything to cheer her up even if she was clueless about this kind of situation. “But he is right, don’t you think? Like you are beautiful, you also have a great job, you are smart, and an incredible person. If he can’t appreciate that you are, then it’s his loss for being so blind and letting his insecurities decide for him,” Aera admitted as she took a bite of the chicken she bought so they could let their sorrows drown in fried food and beer.

Aera patted Ji-Young’s heart softly, trying to calm the crying mess that was her best friend.

“I am pretty sure none of us are fit to survive in the wilderness. Besides, I do love eating Tteokbokki a bit too much to consider giving it up to live with tigers,”

she said with a chuckle, trying to cheer up her best friend.

“You know I am not the best at giving love advice, but you know I’ll be here with you no matter how long it takes to pass this heartbreak, and whatever you decide, I am going to support you. We can key his car if you want, or I can help you get rid of that coworker you don’t like so you can get that promotion, so Byung-Hoon can continue feeling even worse than you are a successful woman!”

Aera said,

“Although I don’t know how I could do the second one without having security throwing me out of the building.”

mood: and for a man!?

outfit: here

location: room

tags: mother of sorrows

coded by Stardust Galaxy

 

[mother of sorrows]

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ji-ji

the worker bee

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just the worst luck...

You know I am not the best at giving love advice, but you know I’ll be here with you no matter how long it takes.

A soft wind rustled the clear curtains in a warm flush and carried within it the chirping of birds. Weak sunlight laid on Aera's bed and warmed the spots where it fell. There is a spot, right under Aera's desk; blotchy, like the landlord didn't paint over it properly; this single spot took Ji-young's attention for a whole minute, the girl staring at it to distract from the urge to roll into a ball and cry until she has nothing left to give. Her heart throbbed like the internal motor of a machine, shaking her entire ribcage with its painful force. There is a distant headache gathering behind her eyes and nose from too much sobbing, but a hesitant smile started at her lips. She knows she won't be okay, for a long while - but Aera's support made the awful weight pressing down on her life that much better.

It's one thing to lose a guy. But it's one thing completely different to have a true friend by your side.

''Please don't go to jail. Or at least, not without me.''

Ji-young said through a fresh spew of hot tears, squeezing Aera's hand. Part of the reason she's crying now is because she's glad; seriously glad that her friend listened. And also because she was hungry but didn't eat the chicken yet.

''But you're right. I won't let a man make me live with tigers. I guess we'll live in this city a bit longer.''

She rolled on her back to grin up at Aera, a wobbly cheerfulness coming back to her. A few tears still trailed down her cheek, but she rubbed them away to sit cross-legged on the bed. Her brain felt swolled with too many thoughts and Ji-young leaned over to take an opened beer, taking a swig like a soulful old man at a bar. Her appetite renewed, she slid to Aera's side to grab a pair of chopsticks and a packet of chicken that smelled so spicy it opened up her nose.

''We need a change, you know.''

Ji-young started, bumping Aera's shoulder with her own and giving her a disappoving squint.

''You especially. When was the last time you've had fun?''

Maybe it's not exactly fair to point it out. She knows Aera has too much to worry about to think about anything related to fun; school, work, debt and keeping up with bills. Aera has always been the type to exist without truly daring to live, having no concrete support system to allow her to dream. It's difficult and Ji-young gets why Aera can't afford to make mistakes; but still, she's of the opinion that Aera deserves to at least take a break, which is something you have force her to do. She would have more luck convincing a bank robber to become a priest.

song title

♡coded by uxie♡

 

[Stardust Galaxy]

cho aera

BROKE GIRL

Aera felt a bit uneasy. She wanted to support Ji-young, but her lack of knowledge regarding relationships made it more difficult. She wanted to empathize with her best friend, but when you had never been in that kind of position, giving some advice felt more like a catalyst to chaos than a way to fix things, and the brief distraction from Ji-Young almost felt like Aera messed up badly, she didn’t have a clue what would she do if her best friend continued crying, probably Aera would start sobbing too at any moment.

“But you’re right. I won’t let a man make me live with tigers. I guess we’ll live in this city a bit longer.’’ With those words, Aera let out a relieved sigh that she didn’t know she was holding in, with the sudden change of demeanor of her best friend, Aera’s face lit up with a brief smile knowing that her friend wouldn’t let herself go down from this situation.

We need a change, you know. You especially. When was the last time you’ve had fun?’’ Ji-Young said, and while Aera was happy that her friend wasn’t feeling gloomy anymore, she wasn’t expecting that sudden change in their conversation, a feeling of embarrassment took over Aera as she wondered when was the last time she had fun, sure catching up a good offer brought her joy but that couldn’t be accepted as having actual fun.

“If I said going to the supermarket last week and treating myself with some ice cream counted as fun, I doubt you will accept that.”

She said with a small shrug,

“I guess it has been a while since I had fun and that smug look on your face is making me believe you already had something on your mind so it’s pretty obvious I won’t be able to refuse to whatever plan you are already preparing in your head.”

mood: wasn't expecting this

outfit: here

location: room

tags: mother of sorrows

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[mother of sorrows]

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ji-ji

the worker bee

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just the worst luck...

“If I said going to the supermarket last week and treating myself with some ice cream counted as fun, I doubt you will accept that.

Cold horror drew Ji-young's face together like a scrunched up lemon, shaking her head as if unable to believe what her poor ears are hearing.

''That's your idea of fun?''

Her eyes widened to the size of dinner plates, taking a slow sip of her luke-warm beer. The fried chicken and very chappy alcohol did its magic to make Ji-young feel like she might have a shot at life still, and not for the first time she's painfully grateful she has friends that actually give a crap about how she's feeling. It's about time she returns the favor - the stress-born dark circles under Aera's eyes have grown darker and despite the smile she's practiced, there is a pink paleness to her that speaks of too much stress and not enough money.

When has she last seen a bar menu and not a student loan bill?

Ji-young poked her arm with a manicured nail, narrowing her eyes. She couldn't fight off the slightly evil smile though, already coming up with a mastermind plan.

''Just one question, my dear, sweet friend.''

Ji-young practically rubbed her hands together now, looking like she's practicing for a villain role.

''Do you have any cute dresses? And I mean a fancy one, not for going to a cafe or something! Something risque, mysterious!''

Something that would make them feel like brand new women stepping off a private plane! But, well, without the private plane money.

Aera looked with disbelief at her best friend at to what she was saying, wide eyes full of surprise which only end up to her laughing. "Stop joking, Ji-young, what are you trying to say? Me, a new woman? That sounds crazy." Aera said, but knew her best friend wouldn't stop. "I guess I have something, but you know my fashion style doesn't scream risque and mysterious."

That's about the response she expected. But Ji-young has an ace up her sleeve.

''That's why you have me.''

There is a touch of ominous plans in her voice, her lips twitching into a smirk that spells trouble.

''Don't worry, I have some dresses you can borrow.''

And makeup. And high heels. And a coupon for a hairstylist she's been putting off on using. Ji-young leans on her elbows to pick up a soggy fry, drenching it in spicy ketchup. Her nose has started to clear up from all the hot peppers, as well as her mind. And her mind is very dangerous indeed.

''Sang-hun works as a manager at this club, right. Really fancy, really expensive to get in. I bet I could get him to sneak us in if I needle him enough.''

Her poor cousin will probably lose a few hairs in the process from being so annoyed, but that's the price of being related to such a lovely woman like her. Ji-young gives Aera a wiggle of her eyebrows, looking mischevious and pleading at once.

''What do you say? A girls night out?''

Aera could already picture the money that was necessary to go there. It was basically being bankrupt for the rest of her life and the next one. "You know I'll love a girls night out, but I doubt I can afford it."

''That's why he's sneaking us in.''

Ji-young cast a sly look.

''It's not illegal if nobody catches you.''

And before Aera can protest, the woman is already on her feet. She looks at her friend now as if considering her from every angle. Ji-young turned her head like some curious mountain cat finding a mouse, her dark eyes gleaming with a mischevious glint that might ruin the world, if no one is there to control her. But that's what friends are for - Aera is serious enough for them both.

''Now.''

The takes hold of Aera's shoulders like a sculptor taking in a tempting clump of clay.

''I don't want another peep of you. Let the mastermind work.''

And by mastermind, she means herself and a couple of makeup brushes.

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♡coded by uxie♡

 

[mother of sorrows]

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chang-min

the reluctant heir

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a night out.

Night, in it's whole velvety shock, has both ended and characterized the city. Neon lights eat away at the frame of the star-sprinkled night, the sidewalks feel contradictory warmer than during the weak sunlight, screams and laughter flash out of moving cars to be lost amongst the tall buildings. It's easy to lose your friends in the bustle and even easier to lose yourself. Night shift bar and noodle stand workers reluctantly drag out brooms to clean before their doors, watching the already drunk passerbys with tired malice. Friday night, the holiest part of the week.

And Chang-min was hiding from all of this behind a dumpster.

The mask over his nose did absolutely nothing to prevent the stench of garbage from attacking his nose and his legs were really starting to hurt from kneeling out of sight, but this was the price of not being seen. Loose gravel crunched under his feet as he shifted, looking nervously up at the dirty neon sign blinking up above him.

God, he starts to pray, if this goes down well, I promise I'll start going to church again.

Neither the neon sign nor God gave any proof that they heard him; probably because he's made this promise at least fifteen times before, and yet Chang-min barely remembers what his local church even looks like.

He isn't on the run. He isn't skulking around here to rob someone, or break into an unlucky person's house. No, the reason the heir of the Pang Company is currently sitting in what might be dried throw up, looking extremely guilty in cheap sweats, is not at all related to crime - he's just really hoping to not be seen by his parents. They explicitly told him that if he goes out tonight, they might just sell him on the black market (or actually, more likely, sent him into military service or marry him off like some poor medieval serf.) Chang-min has racked up enough problems for his parents that those decisions are seeming more and more likely.

First, it was him driving his sports car into an abandoned warehouse. Second, breaking up with a more than shady businessman's daughter and sending her on a bloodthirsty rampage. Third. Well, that one accident with the ostriches...

But he's bored. So painfully bored in his high-rise apartment that even potential punishment is better than being stuck inside and watching the same re-runs of shows that he absolutely hates. Chang-min crafted a plan of the highest genius to escape and produce a few bottles of high quality alcohol, stuck in the plastic bag he has clutching onto for dear life. The club overcharges theirs and Chang-min has all the intentions of actually getting drunk tonight.

All he needs now is his best friend at his side.

He's sent about fifty desperate texts to Ha-joon at this point, all asking for the man's location every few moments. The longer Chang-min had to wait, the more miserable he's been, and Ha-joon is either stuck in traffic or taking his sweet time walking around. Chang-min lets out a shaky sigh as he shifts under the neon light, nose scrunching up as he smells something nasty. Ha-joon owes him at least two drinks for making him wait here for so long.

A noise makes his head shoot up. Footsteps. Chang-min licks his dry lips, shifting in his position to get a better look.

The figure walking through the muck is so familiar that it makes his shoulders sag with relief.

''Ha-joon!''

Chang-min hisses, waving a hand from behind the dumpster discreetly.

''Get over here, now!''

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