Nokumi
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  • Wow… You look scary…
    Nokumi
    Nokumi
    People calling my song overrated and annoying ;-;
    Rekai Leon
    Rekai Leon
    Each person has a different taste, so don’t let that bother you ^_^
    Here is my favourite song, by the way: youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ
    Nokumi
    Nokumi
    Omg that meme- that song is total meme- but ya it's a good song. My number one favorite song of all time. Is "when your evil" by Voltaire
    You have something on your face.
    Nokumi
    Nokumi
    IM also one of the hurt humans... know the ones that are taken advantage of and me myself as a human being misunderstood as a human cuz of my disabilitys.
    Baphomet
    Baphomet
    Yeah. That tends to happen. Humans are cruel. That's why I try to spread love and kindness. <3
    Nokumi
    Nokumi
    That's nice. I try to do the same
    I lost a entire rpnation family... Depression is kicking in. I may avoid talking to certain people. But if they contact me first I'll respond. I haven't been this sad since my dog died... Worst part is I know I won't be missed...
    Here's a poem I made... For those who struggle

    Pain is short but life is for ever.
    Yet pain can scar deeper yet deeper
    The scarlet red of blood that drips from the results
    But they go unseen by those who turn a blind eye
    It sometimes seems hopeless as you lay awake at night
    Your silent screams and your unheard Cry's.
    Doubts filling the void of your mind.
    You feel perhaps its better you say nothing
    That you joke about your troubles and laugh at your pain
    But in truth it is something
    And will take your life one day
    So I urge you don't hold it in
    Say something like I ones did
    Before it takes your life like it did to my friend
    Your void of life will make others suffer
    If you ask for help it will get better
    HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYONE!!

    *does the skele dance as music plays in background and starts to sing*

    Spooky, scary skeletons
    Send shivers down your spine
    Shrieking skulls will shock your soul
    Seal your doom tonight!

    *salutes and falls backwards*
    Anyone else notice things are slow lately? Like NO ONE is responding despite your usual 12 pm notifications when you wake up and 14 other notifications in the bell icon? Just me?
    World's collide and hearts get broken,
    I want to live like I know I'm dying,
    Take up my cross, not be afraid

    [Chorus:]
    Is it true what they say, that words are weapons?
    And if it is, then everybody best stop steppin',
    Cause I got ten in my pocket that'll bend ya locket,
    I'm tired of all these rockers sayin' come with me,
    Wait, it's just about to break, its more than I can take,
    Everything's about to change,
    I feel it in my veins, its not going away,
    Everything's about to change.

    [Solo:]
    It creeps in like a thief in the night,
    Without a sign, without a warning,
    But we are ready and prepared to fight,
    Raise up your swords, don't be afraid,

    [Chorus:]
    Is it true what they say, that words are weapons?
    And if it is, then everybody best stop steppin',
    Cause I got ten in my pocket that'll bend ya locket,
    I'm tired of all these rockers sayin' come with me,
    Wait, it's just about to break, its more than I can take,
    Everything's about to change,
    I feel it in my veins, its not going away,
    Everything's about to change.

    [Solo:]
    This is a warning, like it or not,
    I break down, like a record spinning,
    Gotta get up,
    So back off,
    This is a warning, like it or not,
    I'm tired of listenin', I'm warning you, don't try to get up,

    [Bridge:]
    There's a war going on inside of me tonight,
    (Don't be afraid) [x2]
    There's a war going on inside of me tonight.

    [Outro:]
    Wait, it's just about to break, its more than I can take,
    Everything's about to change,
    I feel it in my veins, its not going away,
    Everything's about to change,
    It's just about to break, its more than I can take,
    Everything's about to change,
    I feel it in my veins, its not going away,
    Everything's about to change.
    My dog died last night... In his sleep... I'm not feeling up to rp... Despite knowing this time was near and despite the fact if he didn't fall asleep permanently by the end of the week we were going to put him down... Its still hard...it hurts my heart. I will be absent the rest of the day..... My apology for the unconvince
    Kaerri
    Kaerri
    *offers hugs* It's always hard to lose someone you love. I hope that his going now spared him unnecessary pain, and that knowing that brings you comfort in this difficult time. Wishing you peace and healing.
    Nokumi
    Nokumi
    Thank you...
    Changing name by adding a second character into my user name! Don't worry! I'm keeping surgess! I can never replace surgess....
    Next was a "trust fall" they sat me on a bed and told me that the goggled I had on had a cap to make it pitch black and blind me but the cameras would still watch my eyes. They put the cap on and I could not see. They made me keep looking to the left while they told me to just drop backwards. I did which was horrifying and I got dizzi. Only to hafto do it again but looking to the right! Then came the final and worst test!!! They had me lay down and pump water into my right ear with high pressure. The room spun out of controle even though I couldn't see anything and it was pitch black with the cap on I could still feel everything spin!! I was crying at this point! When they did this they were telling me to talk while everything was spinning and I just choked on words and couldn't think of what to say I just stuttered! Then they did the same with the other ear after the spinning stopped so I was yet again sent spiraling into outer space from dizziness! Again couldn't speak! And crying! Finally the test was over! My dad had to help walk me to the car because of how sick and dizzi and Nausea's I felt! Then it lasted that way until I got home which is a hour drive! I was still unstable! So I notified I was back on my profile as you can see. Then rested for several hours! So ya that's how that went.
    X_ghost
    X_ghost
    Ohh that is so bad, You went through a lot yesterday. I hope that all of that can fix your issue at the end. Be strong I believe in you
    Kaerri
    Kaerri
    My mom likes to say that hospitals are places where the nicest people do the strangest things to you. I hope these very strange things are worth it and that you're feeling better now!
    Nokumi
    Nokumi
    I do feel better! Thanks! I hope it fixes everything that had been making life hard for most of my life...
    Here's what happened during the test! They first attached pad stickers with wires attached to a computer onto my for head, face, neck and chest then had me move my eyes and lift my head while laying down. Super hard by the way I got a total neck work out! Next they strapped these weird goggles to my head that had cameras attached to it and had me fallow objects with my eyes. The next thing was with those same goggles but they had me watch one object while they grabbed my head and jolted it in quick but short movements. I felt like they were gonna snap my neck it was weird. And I got dizzi. Next they put me in this dome room with a spin chair they call of the rotary chair. And strapped me down with tons of straps! Two going across my chest in a X shape a third going across my waist. On going over my feet and another holding my head down with new goggles that also had cameras watching my eyes. And a strap on each arm. I felt like some lab rat prisoner! They first had me in pitch black fallowing a red dot with my eyes and after I was in even more pitch black but the chair was spinning in all sorts of directions!!! I got super sick and dizzi! All the while I was spinning they were trying to get me to talk which was super hard! I couldn't focus!
    I have returned from the test! Dizzi sick and tired but other wise fine! Results should be back in a few days and hopefully the issue will be fixed! #hopes
    Taking a test for medical related issues. Scared and worried but determined to go through and do the test! Hopefully the doctors find out what's wrong with me... Starts in a little less than 3 hours
    (I'm starting to think I may be obsessed with captain jack sparrow)

    My talents are so hidden even I can't find them!!
    -captain jack sparrow

    The deepest circle of hell is reserved for betrayer's and mutineer's
    -captain jack sparrow

    "A chance to do the right thing"
    I love those moments!
    ...I like to wave at them as they go by!..
    -captain jack sparrow.

    Not all treasure is silver and gold mate.
    -captain jack sparrow.

    Just close your eyes and pretend its all a bad dream.
    That's how I get by
    -captain jack sparrow.
    X_ghost
    X_ghost
    Lol Same here, I've watched this movie series more than 5 times
    TheWeapon
    TheWeapon
    Do some researches about Anne Bonny as well, I think you gonna like her character.
    N-On-E-Mus
    N-On-E-Mus
    Fellow Jack Sparrow enjoyer
    *captain jack sparrow shakes a empty rum bottle upsidedown* why is the rum always gone?... *gets up and drunkenly staggers about the ship* oh... That's why...

    *jack turns to master Gibb* its a pirates life for me..
    Its always the dishonest man
    You can trust to be dishonest.
    Its the honest man you should not trust
    For you would never know when he'd be dishonest.
    -captain jack sparrow
    Crazy people don't know they are crazy
    I know im crazy
    Therefore I am not crazy
    Isn't that crazy?
    -captain Jack sparrow

    The only rules is this:
    What a man can do
    And what a man can't do
    -captain jack sparrow

    If you love two people at the same time
    Choose the second one...
    Because if you really love the first one
    you wouldn't have fallen for the second
    -captain jack sparrow

    The problem is not the problem!
    The problem is your attitude about the problem!
    You see?
    -captain jack sparrow.
    I'm caught up in your expectations
    You're trying to make me live your dream
    But I'm causing you so much frustration
    And you only want the best from me
    You wanted me to show more interests
    To always keep a big bright smile
    Be that pinky little perfect princess
    But I'm not that type of child
    And the storm is rising inside of me
    Don't you feel that our worlds collide?
    It's getting harder to breathe
    It hurts deep inside
    Just let me be
    Who I am
    It's what you really need to understand
    And I hope so hard for the pain to go away
    And it's torturing me
    But I can't break free
    So I cry and cry, but just won't get it out
    The silent scream
    Tell me why you're putting pressure on me
    And everyday you 'cause me harm
    That's the reason why I feel so lonely
    Even though you hold me in your arms
    Wanna put me in a box of glitter
    But I'm just trying to get right out
    And now you're feeling so, so bitter
    Because I've let you down
    And the storm is rising inside of me
    Don't you feel that our worlds collide?
    It's getting harder to breathe
    It hurts deep inside
    Just let me be
    Who I am
    It's what you really need to understand
    And I hope so hard for the pain to go away
    And it's torturing me
    But I can't break free
    So I cry and cry, but just won't get it out
    The silent scream
    Can't you see how I cry for help
    'Cause you should love me just for being myself
    I'll drown in an ocean
    Of pain and emotion
    If you don't save me right away
    Just let me be
    Who I am
    It's what you really need to understand
    And I hope so hard for the pain to go away
    And it's torturing me
    But I can't break free
    So I cry and cry, but just won't get it out
    The silent scream

    My silent scream
    Beautiful silence
    Beautiful pain
    We're only human
    We're meant to dream
    Lost in a life
    Full of mistakes
    We do what feels right
    Then fall with no grace
    Chased by the sun
    Escaping flatlines
    Dreams are a curse
    Wake up you're alive
    Oh slowly fading from the misery
    I've accepted who I'm supposed to be
    I've accepted who I'm supposed to see
    Lady in the mirror
    Oh everyday I'm getting a bit older
    And every time I break I get stronger
    Everyday it's getting a bit colder
    When I grow closer
    To the devil on my shoulder
    To the devil on my shoulder
    Beautiful silence
    Beautiful pain
    Beautiful people
    But we're all stained
    Lost in a life
    Full of mistakes
    We do what feels right
    Then we fall with no grace
    I'mma sinner
    I'mma tainted saint
    I'mma savior
    It's all the same
    Chased by the sun
    Escaping flatlines
    Dreams are a curse
    Wake up you're alive
    Oh slowly fading from the misery
    I've accepted who I'm supposed to be
    I've accepted who I'm supposed to see
    Lady in the mirror
    Oh everyday I'm getting a bit older
    And every time I break I get stronger
    Everyday it's getting a bit colder
    When I grow closer
    To the devil on my shoulder
    To the devil on my shoulder
    We're all broken, it's fate
    It's the way that we're made
    All the pieces are there
    They just aren't in there place
    So I struggle to stand
    But don't ask for a hand
    My pride tells me no
    You're better alone
    I'm uncomfortably numb
    As I stuff what I've found
    And I start to shut down
    Freeze in front of a crowd
    It's what I don't say
    I don't love I don't hate
    Closing my mouth and turning my face
    But it's no way to live to have nothing to give
    Consuming the doubt
    Not letting them in
    But I'm not here to win
    To survive but I'm already dead
    So I picked up my head
    I picked up my head
    I picked up my head
    Oh everyday I'm getting a bit older
    Everyday it's getting a bit colder
    Oh everyday I'm getting a bit older
    Everyday it's getting a bit colder
    When I grow closer
    To the devil on my shoulder
    To the devil on my shoulder
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