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Shigume -surgess-

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  • World's collide and hearts get broken,
    I want to live like I know I'm dying,
    Take up my cross, not be afraid

    [Chorus:]
    Is it true what they say, that words are weapons?
    And if it is, then everybody best stop steppin',
    Cause I got ten in my pocket that'll bend ya locket,
    I'm tired of all these rockers sayin' come with me,
    Wait, it's just about to break, its more than I can take,
    Everything's about to change,
    I feel it in my veins, its not going away,
    Everything's about to change.

    [Solo:]
    It creeps in like a thief in the night,
    Without a sign, without a warning,
    But we are ready and prepared to fight,
    Raise up your swords, don't be afraid,

    [Chorus:]
    Is it true what they say, that words are weapons?
    And if it is, then everybody best stop steppin',
    Cause I got ten in my pocket that'll bend ya locket,
    I'm tired of all these rockers sayin' come with me,
    Wait, it's just about to break, its more than I can take,
    Everything's about to change,
    I feel it in my veins, its not going away,
    Everything's about to change.

    [Solo:]
    This is a warning, like it or not,
    I break down, like a record spinning,
    Gotta get up,
    So back off,
    This is a warning, like it or not,
    I'm tired of listenin', I'm warning you, don't try to get up,

    [Bridge:]
    There's a war going on inside of me tonight,
    (Don't be afraid) [x2]
    There's a war going on inside of me tonight.

    [Outro:]
    Wait, it's just about to break, its more than I can take,
    Everything's about to change,
    I feel it in my veins, its not going away,
    Everything's about to change,
    It's just about to break, its more than I can take,
    Everything's about to change,
    I feel it in my veins, its not going away,
    Everything's about to change.
    My dog died last night... In his sleep... I'm not feeling up to rp... Despite knowing this time was near and despite the fact if he didn't fall asleep permanently by the end of the week we were going to put him down... Its still hard...it hurts my heart. I will be absent the rest of the day..... My apology for the unconvince
    Kaerri
    Kaerri
    *offers hugs* It's always hard to lose someone you love. I hope that his going now spared him unnecessary pain, and that knowing that brings you comfort in this difficult time. Wishing you peace and healing.
    Shigume -surgess-
    Shigume -surgess-
    Thank you...
    Changing name by adding a second character into my user name! Don't worry! I'm keeping surgess! I can never replace surgess....
    Next was a "trust fall" they sat me on a bed and told me that the goggled I had on had a cap to make it pitch black and blind me but the cameras would still watch my eyes. They put the cap on and I could not see. They made me keep looking to the left while they told me to just drop backwards. I did which was horrifying and I got dizzi. Only to hafto do it again but looking to the right! Then came the final and worst test!!! They had me lay down and pump water into my right ear with high pressure. The room spun out of controle even though I couldn't see anything and it was pitch black with the cap on I could still feel everything spin!! I was crying at this point! When they did this they were telling me to talk while everything was spinning and I just choked on words and couldn't think of what to say I just stuttered! Then they did the same with the other ear after the spinning stopped so I was yet again sent spiraling into outer space from dizziness! Again couldn't speak! And crying! Finally the test was over! My dad had to help walk me to the car because of how sick and dizzi and Nausea's I felt! Then it lasted that way until I got home which is a hour drive! I was still unstable! So I notified I was back on my profile as you can see. Then rested for several hours! So ya that's how that went.
    X_ghost
    X_ghost
    Ohh that is so bad, You went through a lot yesterday. I hope that all of that can fix your issue at the end. Be strong I believe in you
    Kaerri
    Kaerri
    My mom likes to say that hospitals are places where the nicest people do the strangest things to you. I hope these very strange things are worth it and that you're feeling better now!
    Shigume -surgess-
    Shigume -surgess-
    I do feel better! Thanks! I hope it fixes everything that had been making life hard for most of my life...
    Here's what happened during the test! They first attached pad stickers with wires attached to a computer onto my for head, face, neck and chest then had me move my eyes and lift my head while laying down. Super hard by the way I got a total neck work out! Next they strapped these weird goggles to my head that had cameras attached to it and had me fallow objects with my eyes. The next thing was with those same goggles but they had me watch one object while they grabbed my head and jolted it in quick but short movements. I felt like they were gonna snap my neck it was weird. And I got dizzi. Next they put me in this dome room with a spin chair they call of the rotary chair. And strapped me down with tons of straps! Two going across my chest in a X shape a third going across my waist. On going over my feet and another holding my head down with new goggles that also had cameras watching my eyes. And a strap on each arm. I felt like some lab rat prisoner! They first had me in pitch black fallowing a red dot with my eyes and after I was in even more pitch black but the chair was spinning in all sorts of directions!!! I got super sick and dizzi! All the while I was spinning they were trying to get me to talk which was super hard! I couldn't focus!
    I have returned from the test! Dizzi sick and tired but other wise fine! Results should be back in a few days and hopefully the issue will be fixed! #hopes
    (I'm starting to think I may be obsessed with captain jack sparrow)

    My talents are so hidden even I can't find them!!
    -captain jack sparrow

    The deepest circle of hell is reserved for betrayer's and mutineer's
    -captain jack sparrow

    "A chance to do the right thing"
    I love those moments!
    ...I like to wave at them as they go by!..
    -captain jack sparrow.

    Not all treasure is silver and gold mate.
    -captain jack sparrow.

    Just close your eyes and pretend its all a bad dream.
    That's how I get by
    -captain jack sparrow.
    X_ghost
    X_ghost
    Lol Same here, I've watched this movie series more than 5 times
    TheWeapon
    TheWeapon
    Do some researches about Anne Bonny as well, I think you gonna like her character.
    N-On-E-Mus
    N-On-E-Mus
    Fellow Jack Sparrow enjoyer
    *captain jack sparrow shakes a empty rum bottle upsidedown* why is the rum always gone?... *gets up and drunkenly staggers about the ship* oh... That's why...

    *jack turns to master Gibb* its a pirates life for me..
    Its always the dishonest man
    You can trust to be dishonest.
    Its the honest man you should not trust
    For you would never know when he'd be dishonest.
    -captain jack sparrow
    Crazy people don't know they are crazy
    I know im crazy
    Therefore I am not crazy
    Isn't that crazy?
    -captain Jack sparrow

    The only rules is this:
    What a man can do
    And what a man can't do
    -captain jack sparrow

    If you love two people at the same time
    Choose the second one...
    Because if you really love the first one
    you wouldn't have fallen for the second
    -captain jack sparrow

    The problem is not the problem!
    The problem is your attitude about the problem!
    You see?
    -captain jack sparrow.
    I'm caught up in your expectations
    You're trying to make me live your dream
    But I'm causing you so much frustration
    And you only want the best from me
    You wanted me to show more interests
    To always keep a big bright smile
    Be that pinky little perfect princess
    But I'm not that type of child
    And the storm is rising inside of me
    Don't you feel that our worlds collide?
    It's getting harder to breathe
    It hurts deep inside
    Just let me be
    Who I am
    It's what you really need to understand
    And I hope so hard for the pain to go away
    And it's torturing me
    But I can't break free
    So I cry and cry, but just won't get it out
    The silent scream
    Tell me why you're putting pressure on me
    And everyday you 'cause me harm
    That's the reason why I feel so lonely
    Even though you hold me in your arms
    Wanna put me in a box of glitter
    But I'm just trying to get right out
    And now you're feeling so, so bitter
    Because I've let you down
    And the storm is rising inside of me
    Don't you feel that our worlds collide?
    It's getting harder to breathe
    It hurts deep inside
    Just let me be
    Who I am
    It's what you really need to understand
    And I hope so hard for the pain to go away
    And it's torturing me
    But I can't break free
    So I cry and cry, but just won't get it out
    The silent scream
    Can't you see how I cry for help
    'Cause you should love me just for being myself
    I'll drown in an ocean
    Of pain and emotion
    If you don't save me right away
    Just let me be
    Who I am
    It's what you really need to understand
    And I hope so hard for the pain to go away
    And it's torturing me
    But I can't break free
    So I cry and cry, but just won't get it out
    The silent scream

    My silent scream
    Beautiful silence
    Beautiful pain
    We're only human
    We're meant to dream
    Lost in a life
    Full of mistakes
    We do what feels right
    Then fall with no grace
    Chased by the sun
    Escaping flatlines
    Dreams are a curse
    Wake up you're alive
    Oh slowly fading from the misery
    I've accepted who I'm supposed to be
    I've accepted who I'm supposed to see
    Lady in the mirror
    Oh everyday I'm getting a bit older
    And every time I break I get stronger
    Everyday it's getting a bit colder
    When I grow closer
    To the devil on my shoulder
    To the devil on my shoulder
    Beautiful silence
    Beautiful pain
    Beautiful people
    But we're all stained
    Lost in a life
    Full of mistakes
    We do what feels right
    Then we fall with no grace
    I'mma sinner
    I'mma tainted saint
    I'mma savior
    It's all the same
    Chased by the sun
    Escaping flatlines
    Dreams are a curse
    Wake up you're alive
    Oh slowly fading from the misery
    I've accepted who I'm supposed to be
    I've accepted who I'm supposed to see
    Lady in the mirror
    Oh everyday I'm getting a bit older
    And every time I break I get stronger
    Everyday it's getting a bit colder
    When I grow closer
    To the devil on my shoulder
    To the devil on my shoulder
    We're all broken, it's fate
    It's the way that we're made
    All the pieces are there
    They just aren't in there place
    So I struggle to stand
    But don't ask for a hand
    My pride tells me no
    You're better alone
    I'm uncomfortably numb
    As I stuff what I've found
    And I start to shut down
    Freeze in front of a crowd
    It's what I don't say
    I don't love I don't hate
    Closing my mouth and turning my face
    But it's no way to live to have nothing to give
    Consuming the doubt
    Not letting them in
    But I'm not here to win
    To survive but I'm already dead
    So I picked up my head
    I picked up my head
    I picked up my head
    Oh everyday I'm getting a bit older
    Everyday it's getting a bit colder
    Oh everyday I'm getting a bit older
    Everyday it's getting a bit colder
    When I grow closer
    To the devil on my shoulder
    To the devil on my shoulder
    (For all the undertale fans out there.)

    Let me put this in a way you IDIOTS will understand

    I'm not the damsal in distress!
    I'm not your best friend
    Or distruat and clueless!

    I'm not like all the rest just trying to get by!
    Nope!
    I'm the bad guy!

    All these former humans that you see!
    Each of them, with shicken knees have knelt before me!
    So I'm not your teammate!
    Or your Partner in crime!
    What am I souls!?
    They're the bad guy!

    Oh its stellar!
    To watch a monster!
    Turn to dust and die...
    Oh its thrillin!
    To be a villain!

    I destroy their homes and then watch them cry!
    Cause I'm the bad guy!

    Alphys: oh my god! They're not trying to conquer the underground because they want to rule it! They want to destroy it! Man that's evil!

    Is this fantastic!
    I see something I slash it!
    And let me tell you why!
    I've always had a weakness!
    For barrenness and weakness!
    I crush all your hopes then watch you cry!

    See I find genocide rather fun!
    I don't want your assistance or your crimination!
    I'll erase this whole world and then bid you bye-bye!
    Why? Cmon guess!!
    Cause your the bad guy?
    That's right!!!
    The king and his men stole the queen from her bed
    and bound her in her bones
    The seas be ours and by the powers
    Where we will, we'll roam

    Yo Ho, all hands, hoist the colors high
    Heave ho, thieves and beggars, never shall we die
    Yo Ho, haul together, hoist the colours high
    Heave ho, thieves and beggars, never shall we die

    Some have died and some are alive
    Others sail on the sea
    With the keys to the cage
    And the devil to pay
    We lay to Fiddler's Green

    The bell has been raised from its watery grave
    Hear its sepulchral tone
    A call to all, pay heed the squall
    Turn your sail towards home

    Yo Ho, haul together, hoist the colours high
    Heave ho, thief and beggar, never say we die
    Hello darkness, my old friend
    I've come to talk with you again
    Because a vision softly creeping
    Left its seeds while I was sleeping
    And the vision that was planted in my brain
    Still remains
    Within the sound of silence
    In restless dreams I walked alone
    Narrow streets of cobblestone
    'Neath the halo of a street lamp
    I turned my collar to the cold and damp
    When my eyes were stabbed by the flash of a neon light
    That split the night
    And touched the sound of silence
    And in the naked light, I saw
    Ten thousand people, maybe more
    People talking without speaking
    People hearing without listening
    People writing songs that voices never share
    And no one dared
    Disturb the sound of silence
    "Fools", said I, "You do not know
    Silence like a cancer grows
    Hear my words that I might teach you
    Take my arms that I might reach you"
    But my words, like silent raindrops fell
    And echoed
    In the wells of silence
    And the people bowed and prayed
    To the neon god they made
    And the sign flashed out its warning
    In the words that it was forming
    And the sign said, "The words of the prophets are written on the subway walls
    And tenement halls"
    And whispered in the sound of silence
    Get up, get up
    Get up, get up
    Get up, get up
    Get up, get up
    Get up, get up
    Get up, get up
    Well, are you ready now
    For the revolution
    For too long your power has been taken away
    It's been taken away
    Does your heart feel heavy now
    Savor the solution
    Take those mental shackles off and throw them away
    You've got to get them out of your mind
    Don't you let their vision leave you blind
    Moving steady now
    It's a revelation
    For so long your focus has been taken away
    Now you're breaking away
    They may think they know you, but here's an education
    No, they can't control you
    Once you've broken away
    They're done patrolling your mind
    When they're searching for you, they will find
    A force they aren't ready for
    (Are you ready!)
    They aren't ready for you to be strong
    (Are you ready!)
    They aren't ready for you to prove them wrong
    They aren't ready for you to be turned into someone
    Who cannot be preyed upon
    That's enough already now
    You don't want to take it
    All your reservations have been taken away
    They've been taken away
    So you think you're ready now
    For the revolution
    Yeah, they can't control you
    Once you've broken away
    You've got to get them out of your mind
    When they stand before you they will find
    A force they aren't ready for
    (Are your ready!)
    They aren't ready for you to be strong
    (Are you ready!)
    They aren't ready for you to prove them wrong
    They aren't ready for you to be turned into someone
    Who cannot be preyed upon
    You've got to get them out of your mind
    When they stand before you they will find
    A force they aren't ready for
    (Are your ready!)
    They aren't ready for you to be strong
    They aren't ready for you to prove them wrong
    (Are you ready!)
    They aren't ready for you to be turned into someone
    Who cannot be preyed upon
    They aren't ready for us to be strong
    They aren't ready for us to prove them wrong
    (Are your ready!)
    Then you know your ready to be turned
    Into people who cannot be preyed upon
    We cannot be preyed upon
    (Are you ready?)
    (Are you ready?)
    (Are you reeeeedy?)
    Not tryna be indie
    Not tryna be cool
    Just tryna be in this
    Tell me, are you too?
    Can you feel where the wind is?
    Can you feel it through
    All of the windows
    Inside this room?

    'Cause I wanna touch you baby
    And I wanna feel you too
    I wanna see the sunrise
    On your sins just me and you

    Light it up, on the run
    Let's make love tonight
    Make it up, fall in love, try

    Baby, I am right here

    But you'll never be alone
    I'll be with you from dusk till dawn
    I'll be with you from dusk till dawn
    Baby, I am right here
    I'll hold you when things go wrong
    I'll be with you from dusk till dawn
    I'll be with you from dusk till dawn
    Baby, I am right here

    I'll be with you from dusk till dawn
    Baby, I am right here
    I've walked a hundred miles down a broken road
    And in my mind I carry such a heavy load
    The voices in my head I think are not my own
    But I will reap the seeds that my hands have sown

    My thoughts are dark and red and I am stained inside
    If I stop now there'd be nowhere for me to hide
    From the sins I feel crawling on my back
    You can't save a soul that you lack

    It's too late now
    I'm too far gone
    I've lost too many chances
    And now I feel myself changing

    I feel myself changing
    With every fight I am changing
    It's easier when you're changing
    Don't stop me now, I am changing
    With every save, I am changing
    Your every move keeps me changing
    Why don't you move? I am changing
    I'll strike you too, I am changing

    When you kill me again, and again, and again, and again
    Don't expect me to shed any tears in the end
    I am only human, after all

    I don't have very far to fall until I'm disconnected, done
    For eternity, that's me, what do you see?
    It's done, and nobody is free

    Because the blood that we spilled can never be undone
    I'd be lying if I said that I didn't have fun
    When I saw you fall down on the ground
    After what you've done to me don't expect any sympathy

    No more friends and no more foes
    No more monsters, no one here to oppose me
    I can finally be free

    From the burden of despair, the burden to care
    For every single person that I've met down there
    It's done, it's over and I've won

    Because the blood that we spilled can never be undone
    I'd be lying if I said that I didn't have fun
    When I saw you fall down on the ground
    After what you've done to me don't expect any sympathy

    You were acting out of self preservation
    But you didn't have enough determination
    Now the world resets to set the evil free
    So don't expect any sympathy
    I love you kitten ❤️😅
    X_ghost
    X_ghost
    *Looked at ur face closely * give me a kiss my little tomato * closing my eyes waiting for u to kiss me *
    Shigume -surgess-
    Shigume -surgess-
    *passed out in your arms from too much*
    X_ghost
    X_ghost
    I think I will take my kiss later * carrying u up and put u on the bed covering u with blanket then give u a forehead kiss * rest for now kitten
    Got a secret
    Can ya keep it
    Swear this one you'll save
    Better lock it
    In your pocket
    Taking this one to the grave
    And to show you
    I know you
    Won't tell what I said
    Two can keep a secret
    if one of them is dead
    Tonight and tommorow morning I will be absent.
    Shigume -surgess-
    Shigume -surgess-
    Sometimes 4... But the average person needs 8 hours at least for every 24 hour's. But with my medication I need at least 12 hours in 24 hours and at max can sleep 14 hours in 24 hours. But I ignore what my doctor suggested. So
    X_ghost
    X_ghost
    Don't ignore the doctor suggestions again at least u should sleep 8 hours u should take care of your health
    Shigume -surgess-
    Shigume -surgess-
    I was doomed since the day I was born. I was born with a lot and I mean ALOT of mental disorders. Meaning I've always been sick. And I got sick and threw up almost every week at least twice. There was then a short relief compared to my whole life of being sick. Just 2 years in a row I never got sick. After that I got more sick then I ever had and threw up when I was sleeping but managed to run to the bathroom. And I kept vomiting ever other minute none stop until my stomack was empty. My dad gave me some things to drink but I just threw that up too. And so he called my mom since she's a nurse on what to do ad she said drink Gatorade since its better for when someone's sick. It stayed down for like a few minutes then I threw it up. And it was a blue Gatorade. After that I threw up 5 minutes later and my vomit was orange and me and my dad freaked out. So he had enough and took me to the hospital and I stayed all night and thankfully since I was soooooooo dehydrated since I haven't drank anything in the entire day they gave me a water bag and hooked it up to me through a needle. By morning after 24 hours I was able to finally eat and drink again.
    (Dont look at the bottom just read the top and imagine whats going to happen by the way i word things)
    You move you lose. We both know your not gonna get away so surrender now. Face the fact! Its over. No one is going to save you now. Resistance is futile. Do you finally get it now? Are you surrenduring? Good. This makes my job alot easier.




    Tag! *runs away laughing*
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