Me as a parent:
Child: Dad, I swear I was asleep last-
Me: You did it poorly.
Me: I could tell by your fake snoring that you were awake and aware. Your phone was gone from your nightstand and you were sleeping in a unnatural position.
Child: How did y-
Me: Stick with the professional.
Teacher: You all remember this from
Me: Easy, obviously Six was tired of Seven’s murderous lust for Nines Flesh. So Six went to the comforting arms of Eight, thus it’s 48
Teacher: So the construction workers build a playground-
In my Mind: Why are they building it? Did they have their own dreams before they were thrown into this cruel world? Maybe they wanted to be cooks, painters, or architects, but the world spit on their passions and now they must go to a wife who only wants the paycheck and children too young to realize, and-
Teacher: Anyone know the answer?
Me: I think my distrust for the man started when he refused to give me a hug. I looked into those cold eyes and found no comfort or remorse. His smile was now dead to me. I can never forgive such a treacherous devil.
Therapist: So this was about Chucky from Chuck E Cheese not hugging you, right?