Lord Pug

That moment when you light on fire all of a sudden and you look at your hands like "Wtf is going on?"


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Trying...so...hard...not...to...cough...

Tfw your anime/manga husbando/waifu dies.


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Tfw you have "Welcome To Night Vale" in blue on your profile when it should be in purple


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When I was younger my grandma told me this story to try and make me not want to tell my location to people online:


A little kid is talking with someone online and they think that person online is a little kid like them but it's really an adult and maybe they meet at like a gas station or something and the adult thinks maybe they want a child and then they go and have a child.

Shameless advertisement...

Friend 1: My allowance right now is at 5 dollars.


Friend 2: Right now I have 8 dollars of allowance.


Me: Right now I have 272 dollars of allowance.


Friend 1: ....


Friend 2: ....


Me: I've been saving for a while.

Apparently no one told him of the deadly consequences of taking pictures of cats.

Oh, I know that forest! I like that forest! It complimented me! It whispered, ‘Kevin, that vest fits you well!’

"They don't want to leave!"


"They can't leave...but they don't want to! Why would they want to? There are so many fun things going on like....work!"


".......Yes!"

So much headache....so much....

My best friends are @Fleur, @jinkx, @AThiefOfSpades, and @The Mechanist ^w^

Your profile picture is so cute, I can't even deal. 

Why wasn't I following you? XD


This should've happened sooner.

Well, Valentine's Day is coming up...it's story time.


So, every year I've been alone for Valentine's Day until I had my first girlfriend. The day before Valentine's Day I pulled an all-nighter to make her the perfect card. I can't quite remember it that well but I think the card had a hand-drawn picture of me and her and some hearts and stuff...well, I gave it to her. She liked it. Sort of. She didn't seem to care that much. Of course, she didn't get me anything. I worked really hard on that card...


Also, my uncle got married on Valentine's Day. I predicted that they would get divorced. Guess what? They got divorced. When my mom told me, I was like, "lol I knew it" which was kind of mean since my dad was really sad for his brother but c'mon. This guy is an ass to me. I gotta get one or two good quips in every so often.


Well...maybe this year I'll give a Valentine to someone that will actually give a shit or two about it.

Hey, does anybody remember my old username?

Every year I go (or, I used to, at least) to my (ex) best friend's house to make Gingerbead houses. We all would eat the candy that we were supposed to be using to decorate. My friend's would all go insane from the sugar, screaming and jumping around around, but I would just get super self-conscious and paranoid.


I wonder what that says about me...

I hate being Transgender.


Today in class I had to go to the bathroom so I went to the teacher and asked him where the bathroom was but he didn't know so he brought me to the next class over and asked that teacher where the "girls bathroom" is. I nearly died of embarrassment. In my head I was screaming, "I'M A BOY." But I was too nervous to say anything.


Guys, don't ever assume someones gender. It just makes you look like an ass and it's really horrible for us Trans* folk that don't pass.

Talking flowers and five-headed dragons!

I don't get why people like soda so much. Then again, I've only ever had it, like, twice in the 13 years that I've been alive so...

Cecil be like:


*there's only two candidates for mayor*


*elects a third candidate instead*

Cecil: I am not dating a munchkin from the Wizard of Oz.


Steve: Are you sure?


Cecil: I am quite sure.

I defy logic.

Trying to figure out what element I am based on what my personality is:


Fire - Usually people with the fire element are known to be hot-headed and outgoing.


Water - Usually people with the water element are known to go with the flow and be very laid back.


Air - Usually people with the air element are known to be very soft-spoken and quiet.


Earth - Usually people with the Earth element are known to be very down-to-Earth and hard-working.


I suppose I'm probably...water? I guess. I'm kind of laid back? Sorta. Meh...none of these fit me, tbh.

*is reading story in which a girl says she hates nerdy, geeky, weird, slightly creepy boys*


*is a nerdy, geeky, weird, slightly creepy boy*


; - ;